Tired of the roller coaster effect...

Good morning all!

I seem to have hit an all time motivational low. I am just so tired of losing the weight and it coming back on and then losing it again and so on. I am active. I can't always get into the gym but I ride horses, I go once a week to kickboxing and I also snow shoe and chase my kids... It's not uncommon for people to ask me how I have the energy to do all the things I do. I do try and eat as healthy as I can, but seem to have no will power for portion control and sweets. My will power sucks and the constant struggle is exhausting especially when you add in shift work, young kids and a small little hobby farm. 3 years ago I was down 22 lbs. I looked great. Slowly the weight has creeped back on. I am 5 lbs from my original weight! The thing is I would notice the weight creep up and then tighten up portions and lose it then I would get tired or stressed and say 'hey I only live once and I am hungry...' and it all goes down the drain.

Is anyone else tired of the struggle? I know I am. Why can't there be a magic pill for will power? Some secret? Wouldn't that be nice. I would be completely satisfied with being down 10 lbs and staying there. I don't even have to go back down to that weight I hit 3 years ago but the effort to struggle with that as well as everything else has me motivationally taped. I hate this feeling :(

Replies

  • monkeymermaid
    monkeymermaid Posts: 1 Member
    I am also tired of the struggle. You're not alone. I'm not really sure how to make things suck less.
  • CassidyScaglione
    CassidyScaglione Posts: 673 Member
    Try some yoga and/or meditation.

    Choose foods that are calorie sparse rather than sense, so that you can eat more and feel full, and don't keep things that tempt you to overendulge in your home.

    Ya, it takes willpower to resist some things, but you are a grownup. If you really want to lose weight, or even just maintain, then stick with that decision and find a system that works to keep yourself in check.
  • crispsandwich
    crispsandwich Posts: 177 Member
    I feel the same, and depresses me that I will be still battling the same 14lbs when im 80!
  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
    edited February 2016
    Try a different approach? If portion control and and eating sweets is a challenge, try the opposite approach?

    For me, it was a matter of completely overhauling how I ate. "Will power" isn't really involved for me. I just eat a particular way. With the exception of a bit of dark chocolate a few times a week, and the very occasional no sugar added ice-cream or pudding (less than monthly), "sweets" just aren't part of how I eat anymore. And I don't miss them.
    I used to have several Dr. Peppers, a donut, and a snickers each day, along with lots of fast food.
    It started with me going cold turkey on all of that stuff, and then building a new diet from scratch. But it also started with me KNOWING that I was starting a new way of life, not just cutting stuff out to lose some weight.

    Regardless, find what works for you and what doesn't require so much willpower. Best of luck.
  • jennkaufer89
    jennkaufer89 Posts: 69 Member
    I can relate! It's hard when you have so many priorities and others who rely on you to be able to focus on yourself.

    However, I've come to realize that there's no secret sauce for creating motivation. When I'm feeling in a rut I ask myself what is one thing I can do to push myself forward towards my goal - usually that's a 30 minute trip to the gym, or logging my most recent meal. Then I build on that, adding something every day. It's about remembering that you need to take time for yourself in order to be there fully for those in your life. If you're always tired, fueling yourself with the wrong foods, and neglecting your own health needs you can't bring 100% to the table for others.

    I'm in that stage right now having gained back about 15 pounds from August of last year and I'm really struggling to get back to a place where I consistently can lose (and keep) my weight at a healthy level. A lot of us on MFP can relate.

    Just keep trying one thing at a time. Do what you can, with what you have, where you are!

    Good luck!!
  • mich0821
    mich0821 Posts: 10 Member
    We would be millionaires if we could solve the motivation struggle!! I lost 88 lbs about 5 years ago on Weight Watchers. I didn't quite make my goal, thought I was cured, and played the "you only live once" game. I have slowly gained about 65 lbs back.
    I have tried to get the motivation back that I once had when I was dedicated to weight loss. Every week I battled with myself over and over again. Feeling guilty for eating this, or that. Feeling disgusted with how I felt in certain clothes, and wanting to bury my body in loose fitting sweatshirts, and sweatpants. Being mad that I can't eat, what I want, when I want!
    I have recently, and when I say recently, I mean in the last 10 days, gotten my motivation back. I bought a Fitbit at Christmas time, and I'm walking daily at work, on breaks, and lunch. I have decided to make sure I walk, at least, 10,000 steps per day, Monday thru Friday. I am also tracking what I eat daily.
    However, this does not stop that haunting question in the back of my head..."what if I lose my motivation?" The key is to not give up! Even if it takes some time to gain the motivation back. Celebrate the little steps you make, those non-scale victories that WW teaches. When the slice of cake you take is smaller than your normal slice. When you say no to that candy bar staring at you in the check out isle. When you opt for a salad instead of a burger. When you make a healthy dinner, and feel satisfied after you've eaten. When you have meal planned for the day, and made your lunch for the next day.
    Stop beating yourself up & focus more on the good than the bad. Treat yourself like you would a friend. Read stories on these pages, and allow yourself to be inspired.
    I wish you the best of luck & both of us long term motivation! We are SO worth it!!
  • eque_price
    eque_price Posts: 32 Member
    Thank you everyone for the reply. It helps to know I am not alone. It has also helped to give me a boost and try and climb back up on that wagon!
  • dubird
    dubird Posts: 1,849 Member
    edited February 2016
    Everyone would love a quick fix, alas, there isn't one. Frustrating, but unavoidable.

    If you're having issues staying with a plan, try starting slower. Maybe make one adjustment, give yourself a week or two to get used to it, and make another adjustment. It is slower, but I know for me it helped that I didn't just change EVERYTHING at once and try to maintain it! Doing it a little at a time kept me from feeling deprived of things I like and helped me build a foundation for where I'm at now. I still have a horrible diet, truth be told, but I did make adjustments to get the nutrition I needed, can stay full for the most part, and still enjoy what I eat.

    Also, motivation? Best gained from yourself, not others. External support and motivation are nice, but sporadic. Take a good, honest look at why YOU want to lose weight and make that your motivation. It doesn't have to be 'to get healthy' either. That wasn't mine. Once you find that, keeping that reason in mind will be your best motivation.

    Also also, you will make mistakes. Learn to forgive yourself for them. When you make a mistake, log it, learn from it, and start fresh next meal/day. Occasional mistakes aren't going to sabotage you or make your a failure. Just makes you human.
  • middlehaitch
    middlehaitch Posts: 8,486 Member
    edited February 2016
    If you are finding it really hard to stick to a calorie deficit you may just be trying to lose too much and are thinking of it as a 'diet'.
    Reassess your goal make it the way you can eat for life. Fit in those things you like, just less of them, less often.

    Look at what maintenance is now take 50 cals off, then 100 cals off, then another 100cals off. 250 cals off your maintenance is .5 lbs a week. Manageable for most.
    You can slowly drop to 1lbs if you find it sustainable.

    The other thing you can do is workout what your maintenance will be at your goal weight and eat that. It will be a deficit that will naturally slow as you get closer to your goal so patience is needed, but it does give you plenty of time to devise a plan that is sustainable.

    Don't eat less than 1200 cals net. And do eat back a portion of your exercise calories, unless you choose to use the TDEE method which includes exercise and spreads the calories over the week.

    Try fitnessfrog.com to play with different scenarios until you find a calorie goal you can work with.

    Cheers, h.

    Edit: http://www.fitnessfrog.com/calculators/tdee-calculator.html

    Here is another calculator that is really easy to play with as you can switch between scenarios.

    https://healthyeater.com/flexible-dieting-calculator
  • eque_price
    eque_price Posts: 32 Member
    Thank you you guys that's very helpful