Pregnancy and babies- what you would have done differently?

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prairieprana
prairieprana Posts: 71 Member
Hello MFP!!

My husband and I are wanting to start a family in the near future and out of curiosity to all you parents out there, what sagely advice would you give to your former selves around pregnancy and having babies?

Anything you would have done differently? Advice you would have ignored?

Thanks and happy Valentine's Day!!

Replies

  • blancoms
    blancoms Posts: 165 Member
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    My first pregnancy I should have exercised more. Exercise was almost non existent. Like take walks most days of the week. Due to no fault of my own, I retained water like crazy so I gained 60+ pounds which made me worry if other people were judging me.
    My next one, especially since now I'm overweight, I plan on keeping a closer eye on my diet and add in that exercise. Right now I'm trying to lose as much as I can before I get pregnant as a lot of problems can be due to weight!

    I feel like thats really all you can do. Be as healthy as you can, and remember that sometimes things happen you don't have control over (such as hormones - I became hypothyroid due to pregnancy).
  • myfavoriteyear
    myfavoriteyear Posts: 31 Member
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    Don't throw all your fitness goals out the window just because you're pregnant. Don't give yourself a license to just eat garbage fooling yourself that you'll just lose weight after the baby. Just redefine your goals. Keep striving for fitness and health.
  • TheChrissyT
    TheChrissyT Posts: 263 Member
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    What myfavoriteyear said. You aren't eating for two adults... and just because you're craving something, doesn't mean you should have it. I craved baconators and mocha frappes... eeeeessssshhhhhhhhh.

    Otherwise, my advice is to take care of yourself. Make taking care of yourself part of a schedule, because if you don't schedule it, it's easy to put it on the back burner while you're taking care of everything else. Make freezer meals that can go in the crock pot for the first couple of weeks after you come home so you don't have to work hard to eat healthy while you recover from child birth. I have a ton of mom advice, but you'll be bombarded with that from all sides, endlessly. I guess my last piece of advice is that you will know your body better than anyone else, and you will know your baby better than anyone else. Trust yourself. If you want to call the doctor, call them. They know that first time pregnant moms don't know what the hell is up. Funny story, I called my doctor in a panic because at about 7 months because I started lactating. (It was clear and sticky on my shirt, I thought I had gotten egg whites on myself while I was cooking at first... not what I was expecting). I panicked because I thought right after that started your milk came in, and I knew that babies needed the clear stuff because their bellies aren't ready for milk right away or something. They were really sweet when they explained to me, and I only felt moderately idiotic.
  • nats2508
    nats2508 Posts: 45 Member
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    Hi!

    Issue close to my heart, as I became a first time mum 2 years ago. I would say (as others have) take care of yourself! tecnically you don't need to eat for two and its not a licence to eat eat eat! take gentle exercise, walking, swimming or whatever is affordable for you. Watch your sugar intake and overall be good to yourself! relax and take things as they come. People always want to give you horror stories and traumas or difficulties of childbirth but take it with a pinch of salt (as they say) and just enjoy the experience. I didn't have the easiest time but I just tried to relax and think of the wonderful baby at the end of it all! Remember, every woman has different experiences so go with how you feel and not totally by the book. Obviously if something doesn't feel right you should go to the doctors but try and be informed and stick to your own decisions.

    All the best!
  • The_Weaze
    The_Weaze Posts: 512 Member
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    Research everything...what kind of care provider you want, what type of birth, how you hope your postpartum experience is...everything. I made informed decisions and have no regrets in regards to my pregnancies or births.
  • yayamom3
    yayamom3 Posts: 939 Member
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    I would have waited a few more years before starting a family. I was 24 when I had my first baby. You just can't fully comprehend (and no one can tell you) how much your life will change and how it will no longer belong to you. I'm very happy being a mom, but I wish we had taken a few more years to ourselves to travel, save money, buy things for the house, etc.
  • Iguessicandothis
    Iguessicandothis Posts: 2,132 Member
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    Sometimes I wonder if I should have had one...
  • PLTNM_INC
    PLTNM_INC Posts: 199 Member
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    Sometimes I wonder if I should have had one...

    Truth
  • chrysalis2015
    chrysalis2015 Posts: 212 Member
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    Sometimes I wonder if I should have had one...

    This

    I love my children. But my marriage basically ended when I announced I was pregnant. 15 years later we're likely separating.

    So be sure your marriage is the kind that can take it. Had I known...I wouldn't have.

  • dublinrose
    dublinrose Posts: 10 Member
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    Worry less and enjoy more.
  • lisalsd1
    lisalsd1 Posts: 1,521 Member
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    I definitely would have eaten better with my first; I did keep exercising up until about 2 weeks before I had the baby. I ate better with the second one, gained a couple of pounds less, and lost the baby weight a bit sooner. I would have tried to get more sleep BEFORE I had the baby (that's something you will miss). I should have taken more pregnant pictures too. As cheesy as those monthly stomach pictures are...I'll probably wish I had those when my kids are grown. Oh and I would have refused the Staidol (sp?) with the first.

    The things I definitely did right: breastfeeding, birth classes/breastfeeding/CPR class, packed my freezer full of ready-to-go meals a couple of days before having the baby, go on 1 last vacation.
  • bluestarlight19
    bluestarlight19 Posts: 419 Member
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    Oh so much! but water under the bridge as they say!
    With my first...I wish I had listened to the doctors and taken my iron pill while pregnant. I didn't like the side effects from it so I didn't take it, but boy was I wiped from anemia after her birth. Also, to not beat myself up so badly because I was unable to breastfeed her. Pumping worked out just fine. And actually...for my second, in hind sight, I wish I had pumped instead of breastfed! It would have given me a LOT more sleep and also she would have bonded better with her father. And it would have better prepared me and her for when I went back to work.

    If you are breastfeeding: Stay hydrated! eat healthy but eat enough. Also, expect to be very hungry because making milk takes a lot of energy and healing from a birth takes energy. well, at least I was anyways.

    I would say, don't worry about losing weight for the first 6 weeks or so after birth. Just worry about you and baby. That was one thing I did right.
    One thing I did wrong was I kept that going...hahahaha....When I did finally get out of the house, I found that taking them for a walk, especially in the morning, helped me and also helped to set their sleep schedule a little better. Doesn't have to be a long walk, just getting outside and some fresh air and sun.

    They will all warn you, but no one can really prepare you for the sleep deprivation. Especially if you are a person who really needs/likes sleep. Try to aim for 4-5 uninterrupted hours. What really helped me was after the 2-3am feeding, my husband would take the morning one at around 6 or 7am so I could get that stretch to make me feel a little human.

    3 week growth spurt. No one warned me about that one! at least I was more prepared for my second child. There is also a 4 months one too, my oldest skipped that one but my youngest got nailed...that was a doozy.

    Morning sickness. If its bad, like I had it, I mean so bad that I lost 25lbs each time, just try to get by the best you can. I do feel guilty having to take meds to get through that but my kids would not be here if I didn't and they turned out fine so far. (all doctor approved)

    Babies are different. My oldest liked her sleeping space and wasn't as much of a cuddler, started sleeping 10 hours/ night at 11 weeks old, loved having her own bed/space. My youngest....we had to co-sleep for 18 months, she went straight to a regular bed because for some reason she was absolutely terrified of the crib and hated sleeping alone. She is a super cuddler and a very active kid and did not sleep through the night...until after she was a year old. zzzzz There is only so much you can do to help, they will do it on there own time.

    You can never take enough pics/video of your pregnant self, when they are born, sleeping, eating, first things, etc. They grow sooo quickly in the first year and you may be so sleep deprived that you have to grab that camera sometimes and not miss it. But make sure you are seeing it and experiencing too :)

    Right now...I regret that I have to work so we can live and have food, otherwise I would spend all my time with them. But they are almost school age now and daycare has been really good for them. They love making friends and experiencing new things and learning. So in the long run I do not regret daycare, I just miss the time I am missing.

    lol, so a lot of parenting is basically, relax, take a deeeeeeep breath. Your doing fine, each kid is different and results may vary.
  • HealthyBodySickMind
    HealthyBodySickMind Posts: 1,207 Member
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    Honestly, I wouldn't do anything differently. I loved being pregnant. I had a good pregnancy, a good birth, and a happy baby. She'll be two next week.

    I think we are going to quit while we're ahead though. I have a teenage step-daughter also, and the family dynamic just works right now.
  • kris10cass
    kris10cass Posts: 47 Member
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    Start prenatals before you get pregnant! Don't eat for 2.. but if you have a craving-- go for it! I didn't exercise, except for walking and I lost all but 4 lbs of my baby weight... what I would NOT suggest is listening to the people that tell you to eat extra calories when you are nursing because your body burns more calories... may work for some but DID NOT work for me.. I gained 15lbs AFTER baby! Ugh.. as far as life after baby-- yes it is different.. yes, there are good times and tough times... that is LIFE.... but it is the most amazing thing I've ever experienced. Would not change it for the world... :) Best wishes!