The Fat Apron - A Secret Society

yes i have the apron too, and it sags and folds over more on one side because my 1st child was a c-section, i used to wear pants lower before but now i wear them right across my belly button, and when i sit i pull the pants even higher to contain and smash it down. i know my "ideal weight " is 115-125 but i guess my body structure is set weird because at that weight im a bag of bones, litterally sunken in looking very sickly to where if someone saw me they would be very concerned and might try to help me. i have big hips so even at 190lbs right now my hip bones are just under half and in from my skin. my big final goal is 140-135 lbs. there is where i look normal average woman and look like i was the medical standards for my weight, i look thinner than i really am. i think its my stomach that im most ashamed of on my body its covered in very wide deep stretch marks extreamly close together its a rippled mess despite cocoa butter thru preganncy id wake up belly bleeding from new stretch marks. i have 2 beautiful girls, and a very saggy lumpy belly and they are starting school soon. i still have lots of weight to lose, but skin removal i dont see as an option for me, lack of funds and id also maybe want to have 1-2 more kids. i know im going to be stuck with my tummy after i lose the weight. my recent ex husband left me saying i was too fat to love. but according to the attention from so many men, my ex is obviously a shallow prick who is wrong. heck right now im falling for a guy that is 270lbs. and he accepts and thinks every inch of me is beautiful. apron and all.