How to promote healthy body image in girls

nikkijean8 · June 2011

I wasn't quite sure where to post this, but it's something I've wondered for a long time, and I'd like to hear some different opinions on the subject.

I have a 2-year old daughter (so yes, I'm a bit early to be worrying), and it always strikes me how she copies everything I do. Lately, she wants to play with my measuring tape and will wrap it around her waist the way I do. She also likes to step on the scale after I do (we're visiting my husband in Korea right now in his teeny tiny dorm room, so there's really no getting away from her).

I have to admit, it freaks me out a bit. Am I sending the wrong message? I mean, on the other side of the coin, she asks to go on runs with me and tries to stretch with me afterwards (its really cute to see a 2-year old trying to stretch her quads), so its not all bad. But, I guess I'm not so much asking about specifics as general help.

Over the course of her life - how do I promote healthy eating and exercise without making her obsessed with her body? Is it even possible with the way everyone gets bombarded by the media's image of the perfect woman? My husband and I both note that our parents didn't really teach us anything about healthy eating or exercise and we would both like to change that with our children. However, one of my best friends battled with anorexia and bulimia as a teen and young adult because her mother (who was a model) wouldn't allow ANYTHING unhealthy in the house. My friend told me it just made her want it more and she would gorge herself at friends' houses that had junk food. Sorry - didn't mean to oversimplify - she battled with eating disorders because she took after her father, not her mother, and so was naturally bigger than her mom who was constantly bringing up her weight to her (and she wasn't an unhealthy weight).

And - is it too early to worry? I've already tried to stop saying things like "I'm so fat" in front of her - is it silly at this age to worry about her seeing me step on the scale everyday? I've done a search on the topic, but I thought I'd re-introduce it and see what kind of replies I get (I'd love to get replies from both men and women - parents and not!). Thanks all!

skinnyhopes · June 2011

I can relate.
I have a young brother and he thinks he's fat (4'3" and 60 lbs so not fat at all-you can see his ribs!), and I think it's just because of how kids at school rave about 6 packs and stuff. I even thinks it's because of me. Whenever I'm on MFP, he's like you should make me one, and I'm like no your to young and already thin. But the good thing is they'll kind of watch their diet, and not eat that unhealthy.
I even know a mom who made her overweight daughter lose weight, by not giving her junk food and forcing her to play, while letting her thinner sisters eat anything.

Back to the point, just start teaching her healthy habits, and don't always talk about food and calories in front of her.
I hope I helped

SlipperySlope · June 2011

I think you are to be commended for actively caring so much about your daughter.

In my opinion, it is never too early to be aware of the messages sent to children, and I think it's great that you've realized some of the things you do that she may be picking up on. I especially like the idea that you no longer verbalize discouraged thoughts about your body in front of her.

Sounds to me like you've already taken some great steps towards helping her, the first of which is awareness of your attitudes and actions. She's lucky to have a mom who wants this for her.

abalicious · June 2011

I think you're doing a great job; at least you are setting a positive example. As long as you are doing healthy things in front of her, then there is no cause to worry.

christine24t · June 2011

I would eat healthy and exercise in front of her, but avoid weight discussions and stepping on the scale in front of her. and I would tell her that you are eating to be healthy, not to lose weight (but i'm not sure if she would understand that yet).

Teemo · June 2011

Obviously not the most qualified being neither young or a girl, but promoting healthy eating and exercise doesn't have to be obtrusive. Healthy and sustainable eating doesn't even have to be boring! It doesn't even mean you can't have desserts or cookies or ice cream or all that stuff...

I would think that if you just make healthy eating part of your lives your daughter probably wouldn't even notice that she was eating well or differently than her "less healthy" friends.

Dahlface13 · June 2011

I'm afraid I'm not really too much help except to say that I wouldn't worry about her playing with measuring tape and the scales yet. At that point in her development she doesn't know what it means, she's not worrying that she's fat, she's just acting like mommy. Much like when kids repeat bad words they heard their parents say without any idea what they mean. Keep teaching her healthy habits and lead by example. By getting into better shape now you can model healthy behaviors, eating good foods, exercising regularly, and eventually maintaining a HEALTHY weight.

Another place you may be interested in looking is at www.offbeatmama.com you can search through the site's archives or email the editors and maybe get some more interesting answers.

Good luck!

TashaP2011 · June 2011

We have 3 kids, and have tried never to comment on anything about our outward appearances in a negative light in front of the kids. We try to focus on the internal health benefits of what we do for exercise and diet. It also keeps me from overusing supplements since they are not something I would ever let the kids use. I try to restrict my diet to "real food" as much as possible. I am sure we are not perfect at doing this, but we do try. I hope that we are able to give them the confidence to see their bodies as the amazing gifts they are, and not always comparing them to media portrayals.

Bridge_CG · June 2011

I don't think it's too early. I mean, she might not quite understand the concept yet, but it's never too early to instill a "healthy" body image into your little daughter. I mean, your daughter will do as she sees from you. You're not sending the wrong message- just don't say "god I'm so fat" right in front of her. I don't think that's something healthy to do. Instead look at yourself and say, I love this about myself.

Be a good role model. For yourself and for her. When she asks your about the social media, or even starts having her doubts, just constantly remind her how beautiful she is and and how fake those women are, and that she's a gorgeous work of art. She needs to know the value of health, and a healthy image.

I know I'm not a mom, but my momma is very negative about herself and it bugs the crap out of me. I've never thought I was that pretty, and I've always been a little over weight, well... Pretty over weight, and friends who could eat anything they pleased. So, tell your daughter she is beautiful, there's nothing wrong with her. Tell her that, and tell yourself that. There's no better way to show true beauty then showing it from your confidence!

Samiwhereareyou · June 2011

My mother was a gyming machine when I was a kid she worked at the gym and taught buns of steel and step classes our family outings were bike riding and hiking. She got heat stoke when I was 11 and put on a lot of weight but was still strong and supportive. I grew up knowing she was beautiful. She Taught me healthy eating habits as a kid and when I gained 50lbs after high school and started getting really down on myself she told me there was just more of me to love.
I guess what I am saying is You are doing the right things. Being positive stretching with her showing her how to be healthy getting her on the right track early and loving her even if she becomes 300lbs. Your love will take her through the hard times. Shes not to young to understand that you want to be healthy and for her to be to.

Kristinemillar · June 2011

As a Mother to an 11 year old gilr I believe the best way to instil a good body image in your child is to tell them every day that they are beautiful. I don't measure/weigh myself where my daughter can see but she is so slim and tall I doubt she'll ever have weight issues.

As for healthy eating.. That begins at home. 2 is slightly too young to get involved in cooking with you but in a couple of years get her to help you prepare healthy meals for the family and as you go explain what each food is and why it is good for you. Over time she will develop a sense for healthy eating..

BUT.. Don't restrict chocolate and candy, I am a firm believer in everything in moderation, my daughter has free access to junk food and always has. She eats it very ocassionally, to the point that easter eggs/xmas chocolate usually ends up in the bin as it's out of date.

Mostly though, just believe in your ability to educate your child... It's good that she exercises with you though, never too young to be keeping your body fit.

How to promote healthy body image in girls

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