Anyone else's aesthetic standards for their body actually increased as they got older in adulthood?

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Replies

  • WakkoW
    WakkoW Posts: 567 Member
    Nope. My goal used to be only to look good. Now that I'm in my 40's my goals are not only to maintain what I have, but to also get faster and stronger.
  • WendyLaubach
    WendyLaubach Posts: 518 Member
    I don't have any problem with aiming to look good. I'm middle-aged, so it's not about looking like a hot 19-year-old or even a hot 35-year-old. But I look at ladies at my church who are well into their 70s and still wearing nice, dignified clothing that fits and hangs well, because they're appropriately trim. They're not baring their midriffs or anything crazy, but they're not wearing mumus or feeling embarrassed, either. Of course I want to be stronger and lighter as well, for reasons of health and comfort.

    So I'm not looking at it the same way I was when I was 20 and wanted to attract a new sexual partner, but it would be very nice to look at a snapshot of myself and think, "That looks like a normal, healthy person, not someone who's lost all control."
  • newheavensearth
    newheavensearth Posts: 870 Member
    As a teenager I knew I was overweight but didn't care, because I was taught that worrying about your weight was vanity. In my twenties I started exercising to lose baby weight and when I started seeing results from weight training, I decided I wanted to get into fitness competition. I never had the time or money to train or prep for it, so I scaled my goals back to just being healthy, strong, and fit. Now I want to maintain a healthy weight with a decent amount of muscle tone. I'm almost there. I'm not after the ripped to shreds look anymore.
  • MalkienChrysantheum
    MalkienChrysantheum Posts: 14 Member
    I've got to get used to the speed that the threads move on this site!

    middlehaitch wrote: »
    I work harder in my 60's to retain a decent amount of LBM than I ever have.

    I never worried about it up until I hit my 50's, and never thought I would ever workout 6 days a week to maintain a higher standard than I did when I was younger.

    When I was younger I thought I would be old and past it by 60!

    I am also pretty vain now and work out hard to maintain a good visual figure.

    It surprised me when I hit my weight goal and really loved what I saw, and what I could do.

    Cheers, h.


    Well, it's great that you're still working at it and still got it in your 60's. :)


  • AigreDoux
    AigreDoux Posts: 594 Member
    I don't think my vanity is any different. I think as I get older, I have more self confidence that body changes are possible, however. So while 20 year old me would not have even tried weight lifting (I was always a uncoordinated, last pick in gym class kid), 36 year old me says "you can do anything with enough patience and effort".
  • MalkienChrysantheum
    MalkienChrysantheum Posts: 14 Member
    edited March 2016
    synacious wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    Lol, absolutely not. Besides, I'll never reach the aesthetic goal I was going for because of the pouch of loose skin that I have anyway, and I have no desire to spend hours doing something that I find extremely boring (heavy lifting) just for vanity purposes. There's more to life than that...

    There's a difference between aesthetics and vanity though. I can't speak for the OP, but my aesthetic goals with regard to fitness have zero to do with vanity. I couldn't care less how other people view me. I'm not attracted to other people; I live a life of celibacy so improvements to my body are of no benefit to anyone else. I have these goals because I want to see how hard I can push myself. Losing weight is one thing, but I know that I never pushed myself to strive for more than that in the past. I want to see how much stronger I can get and what my body will look like when I try to work to my limits. I want to be able to look at all aspects of my life and say I worked to my highest potential. I used to suffer from depression and having structure with exercise, my diet, and sleep has completely reversed that. It's those improvements that bring about my discipline and drives me to do more. When I go running or hiking in the park, I feel a high because it feels like that's where I belong. I could spend hours in nature running and walking. Heck, if other people weren't in the park, I'd probably dance and skip too. There's something about using my body for purposes other than mundane, everyday tasks that uplifts me and makes me feel stronger physically and mentally. It makes me feel free.

    Everyone has different objectives with regard to health, fitness, and their own body. Just because OP has certain aesthetic goals doesn't mean she's spending hours in the gym or that's all she thinks there is to life.


    Yeah, aesthetics in terms of my body is like an art project to me, but it affects my confidence in other things as well. Having the kind of discipline to whittle and chip away at my body to an optimal point for me would spread into other areas in my life and is something I value on its own, but it would help manage other areas in my life that could use that kind of mindset- my career, my travels, being a new person mentally, etc.
  • ASKyle
    ASKyle Posts: 1,475 Member
    aggelikik wrote: »
    synacious wrote: »
    aggelikik wrote: »
    MalkienChrysantheum wrote: »
    I'm not talking about in terms of compensating for lines, wrinkles, middle age spread, etc., but I mean everything else considered pretty much equal, you now have much more advanced goals in terms of your body fat percentage, muscle tone, overall shape, etc.? It's funny how as life goes on, the more I realize that I'm such a late bloomer in so many more ways than one. I've never been fat enough throughout my twenties that people called me out on it, but I was at best 20-25% body fat at any given point. Now, I want to reach athletic body fat percent of sub-20%, get into competition level at 12-15 percent, but be able to maintain year-round at no more than 18%. I'm not going to waste energy kicking myself for not doing this years earlier and maintaining since, but I'm driven like a wild animal to attack for this now. You would think that as a teenager or early twenty-something, the aesthetic standards are higher, but not for this one...

    You are 29. I do not understand this post.

    Well as a 31 year old woman I know exactly what she's talking about. As she said, it's not about lines, wrinkles, etc. it's about having a new level of respect for your body. 29 isn't old, but it definitely is older than being in your teens and early twenties. It's so common for people, especially women, to hear that after somewhere around 25 their looks are gone and their bodies will turn into absolute trash as the years progress. Those of us who are educated about fitness know this isn't true, but as a whole society is led to believe that after a certain age women magically become overweight and, unless they were fit as a teenager, there is nothing they can do about it. I weigh less now than I did in 3rd grade. I was 120 pounds back then and came from a home where proper nutrition wasn't a focal point. My weight fluctuated with growth spurts and activity, but even throughout middle school I was 120 to 135 pounds, in high school I hit my maximum of 190 pounds, and I when I lost weight after that, my lowest was 111 pounds. Earlier this month, I just hit my lowest weight of 109 pounds and I actually have visible abs for the first time in my life. I'm 112 now and building muscle, but to actually have as much muscle as I do is a new thing for me and I love it.

    Like @MalkienChrysantheum, I have more advanced goals in terms of fitness. I've lost weight before and when I was 111 pounds at the age of 21, I didn't look half as good as I do now. The difference was back then the only focus was a number on the scale and the silly belief that weights would make me look bulky whereas now I'm lifting weights and strength is my primary focus. I am much more disciplined about my physique now than I ever was in my teenage years and early twenties. I was obese in my teenage years then when I turned 18 I did something about it, so I completely understand the late bloomer feelings as well. I also have similar feelings of "If only I did this five years earlier", but I know dwelling on the past will get me nowhere.

    Hmm, if someone in her 20s or even early 30s is concerned about wrinkes, this is definitely not the norm, since for most people this age, it is a theoretical thing that might happen in the future. I have never heard IRL anyone talk about being "old" after 25, not even for people whose careers depend on looks. 20s is early adulthood, it is not older adulthood. It is not much different at 22 or 29. It is actually the time most people who are amateur athletes who did not start in childhood have their best performance, and it is the time most single people make their biggest effort to look good and to feel confident. Plus the awkwardness of adolescence is gone, and most people are trying to make the best out of their life in all aspects. I think what OP describes is pretty much how things progress for many people, who are still young enough, not older, 20s and 30s is about looks and reaching goals for many. As you get older, it is more about doign things while you still can, trying to age gracefully or even prolong youth for as long as possible, and it is definitely more about health.

    I disagree. Women in their 20's and definitely 30's experience wrinkles. It is the norm.

    22 and 29 (or even 27, in my case) are completely different periods of life. There's a lot of change that happens between college and being 4+ years into your career, settling down with someone, and purchasing a home, etc.

    5 years ago I just wanted to be skinny, and I was. Constant cardio, partying, and eating poorly. Now, I don't care what size I am, as long as it's solid, so now I primarily focus on lifting, eating to support that, and getting adequate rest.

    OP, to answer your question, it did change for me. I no longer want to be thin, but a solid curvy figure.
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,216 Member
    At 60, I just want to be stronger and more capable. It's one of the main things between me and the assisted living facilities. Do I look better? Probably. Do I care about that? Not one single bleepin' bit.

    So, yes, our perspectives change as we age. If your perspective drives you in a direction that happens to be healthier, whether health is your primary goal or not, good show!
  • Livgetfit
    Livgetfit Posts: 352 Member
    ASKyle wrote: »
    aggelikik wrote: »
    synacious wrote: »
    aggelikik wrote: »
    MalkienChrysantheum wrote: »
    I'm not talking about in terms of compensating for lines, wrinkles, middle age spread, etc., but I mean everything else considered pretty much equal, you now have much more advanced goals in terms of your body fat percentage, muscle tone, overall shape, etc.? It's funny how as life goes on, the more I realize that I'm such a late bloomer in so many more ways than one. I've never been fat enough throughout my twenties that people called me out on it, but I was at best 20-25% body fat at any given point. Now, I want to reach athletic body fat percent of sub-20%, get into competition level at 12-15 percent, but be able to maintain year-round at no more than 18%. I'm not going to waste energy kicking myself for not doing this years earlier and maintaining since, but I'm driven like a wild animal to attack for this now. You would think that as a teenager or early twenty-something, the aesthetic standards are higher, but not for this one...

    You are 29. I do not understand this post.

    Well as a 31 year old woman I know exactly what she's talking about. As she said, it's not about lines, wrinkles, etc. it's about having a new level of respect for your body. 29 isn't old, but it definitely is older than being in your teens and early twenties. It's so common for people, especially women, to hear that after somewhere around 25 their looks are gone and their bodies will turn into absolute trash as the years progress. Those of us who are educated about fitness know this isn't true, but as a whole society is led to believe that after a certain age women magically become overweight and, unless they were fit as a teenager, there is nothing they can do about it. I weigh less now than I did in 3rd grade. I was 120 pounds back then and came from a home where proper nutrition wasn't a focal point. My weight fluctuated with growth spurts and activity, but even throughout middle school I was 120 to 135 pounds, in high school I hit my maximum of 190 pounds, and I when I lost weight after that, my lowest was 111 pounds. Earlier this month, I just hit my lowest weight of 109 pounds and I actually have visible abs for the first time in my life. I'm 112 now and building muscle, but to actually have as much muscle as I do is a new thing for me and I love it.

    Like @MalkienChrysantheum, I have more advanced goals in terms of fitness. I've lost weight before and when I was 111 pounds at the age of 21, I didn't look half as good as I do now. The difference was back then the only focus was a number on the scale and the silly belief that weights would make me look bulky whereas now I'm lifting weights and strength is my primary focus. I am much more disciplined about my physique now than I ever was in my teenage years and early twenties. I was obese in my teenage years then when I turned 18 I did something about it, so I completely understand the late bloomer feelings as well. I also have similar feelings of "If only I did this five years earlier", but I know dwelling on the past will get me nowhere.

    Hmm, if someone in her 20s or even early 30s is concerned about wrinkes, this is definitely not the norm, since for most people this age, it is a theoretical thing that might happen in the future. I have never heard IRL anyone talk about being "old" after 25, not even for people whose careers depend on looks. 20s is early adulthood, it is not older adulthood. It is not much different at 22 or 29. It is actually the time most people who are amateur athletes who did not start in childhood have their best performance, and it is the time most single people make their biggest effort to look good and to feel confident. Plus the awkwardness of adolescence is gone, and most people are trying to make the best out of their life in all aspects. I think what OP describes is pretty much how things progress for many people, who are still young enough, not older, 20s and 30s is about looks and reaching goals for many. As you get older, it is more about doign things while you still can, trying to age gracefully or even prolong youth for as long as possible, and it is definitely more about health.

    I disagree. Women in their 20's and definitely 30's experience wrinkles. It is the norm.

    22 and 29 (or even 27, in my case) are completely different periods of life. There's a lot of change that happens between college and being 4+ years into your career, settling down with someone, and purchasing a home, etc.

    5 years ago I just wanted to be skinny, and I was. Constant cardio, partying, and eating poorly. Now, I don't care what size I am, as long as it's solid, so now I primarily focus on lifting, eating to support that, and getting adequate rest.

    OP, to answer your question, it did change for me. I no longer want to be thin, but a solid curvy figure.

    Amen to this. Wrinkles are no solely about age, they are about genetics and lifestyle factors too. The women on my fathers side have gotten to their mid/late-40s without a hint of crowsfeet. My mum had the beginnings of crowsfeet at 35.

    I also agree that my standards have changed but I'd isolate these to 2 different things:
    1. I now know more about healthy living so I hold myself accountable to living that way as much as I can
    2. I, like the last commenter, have a changed view of what is aesthetically pleasing to me. Thin/skinny no longer appeals to me. Fit, defined, toned and curvy is what I now aspire to be.

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