Member for over 5 years, first post ever, male with anorexia

I've been using myfitnesspal for years and years, deactivating and remaking an account every time I had to put in a food I didn't actually want to eat to "fix" the account. I'm getting older I'm panicking more about of the fact that I have even more weight than when I started out. At 23 I'm starting to build a real life but the only thing I can think about when I meet someone new, or have a new experience is that I haven't recovered yet.

I've been restrictive what I eat since around 2000 when I was around 9 before I had any idea what calories or nutrition were. In 2012 when I was 19 I was hospitalized and diagnosed with EDNOS, eating disorder not otherwise specified, in my case anorexia with overexercising, with no binge or purge behavior. I can't stress enough my eating disorder is not about wanting to be thin or weight but that restricting makes me in control however I've learn less harmful and destructive ways to feel a healthy level of control through treatment.

So now I'm trying something that I've never done before and that's try to make connections through here. I'm looking for accountability buddies, ideally men and men with anorexia so we can share the highs and support each other through the lows to help make recovery more bearable. I want to lose weight in a health way without relapsing, and without feeling alone.

I'm a culinary major with the focus on food sustainability and nutrition, currently working as a cook for a catering company. I like to going hiking to the beach, rock and folk music like mother mother, fall out boy and kimya dawson, video games like dragon age. My boyfriend Evan and I have been together for 8 months.

I look forward to becoming friends with you : D