Rejoining after I lost my baby

starryeyedsnoozer
starryeyedsnoozer Posts: 89 Member
edited September 28 in Health and Weight Loss
Hi, I joined a while ago and really enjoyed it here. Then I found out I was pregnant - it was a surprise but a very happy one! I stopped coming here while I researched a healthy diet plan for my pregnancy and I bought some great pre-natal work out DVDs. Sadly, at 8 weeks pregnant I collapsed and went to the hospital. They found that the baby was ectopic and my tube had ruptured so I had surgery to remove it. That was 5 weeks ago and I feel physically recovered from the surgery enough to get back in the game again. I need to focus on something other than my loss - which has devastated me. I am going to need a lot of support, so please bear with me and if you have been in a similar situation I'd love to hear from you.
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Replies

  • kamoira23
    kamoira23 Posts: 193
    So sorry to hear about your loss! I used to be a neo-natal Social Worker and have seen this a few times. It is devastating. Everyone heals emotionally on their own time, so don't worry if you're still grieving. Good luck!
  • zml_mom
    zml_mom Posts: 270 Member
    I haven't but I am here to for you and help keep you motivated
    I can't imagine what your going through :(
  • Buddie616
    Buddie616 Posts: 167 Member
    Bless your heart! HUGSSSSSS!!!!
  • luvmy2babies
    luvmy2babies Posts: 94 Member
    I am so sorry for your loss. Good Luck in your weight loss journey.
  • bankerangie
    bankerangie Posts: 17
    I am so sorry for your loss. (((HUGS)))
  • JezebelGL
    JezebelGL Posts: 33 Member
    I'm so sorry for your loss! Welcome back. I hope you find the support here that you need, and if you don't, I'm a member of another board with a wonderful support network for Mama's who experienced losses as well. I can give you the info if you'd like. :heart:
  • emccand
    emccand Posts: 195 Member
    Im so sorry to hear that happened to you :( Dont give up hope!
  • kellyscomeback
    kellyscomeback Posts: 1,369 Member
    I know how you feel, I had 5 m/c in 3 years before I had a healthy & full term pregnancy. Welcome back and best of luck on your TCC journey.
  • FaugHorn
    FaugHorn Posts: 1,060 Member
    I'm so sorry for your loss. If you are looking for ways to work through your grief or need the support of others that have gone through what you have then you can also go to http://facesofloss.com/ which is a support group.
  • Solat37_Neil
    Solat37_Neil Posts: 379 Member
    Sorry for your loss.. My wife miscarried 2 years ago and I know how gut wrenching it is :brokenheart: Hope you can move on and learn to smile again.. X
  • Countrymade
    Countrymade Posts: 183 Member
    So very sorry for your loss.
  • Lunarokra
    Lunarokra Posts: 855 Member
    Wow, it is very painful. I completely understand you, mine was discovered on time but they removed my left ovary.

    I have read alot on this and still get teary once in a while, but thank God i have one boy who turns 13 today and I love him very much.

    I have decided to focus on getting healthy, and focusing on me. I wish you the strength and courage to be able to move on, I know it is hard.

    Hope I can be supportive, feel free to add me.
  • Cordy_in_CT
    Cordy_in_CT Posts: 134 Member
    So sorry. Welcome back. Good luck to you on your journey.
  • runlorirun
    runlorirun Posts: 389
    I am so sorry for you loss. I lost a baby at 10 week, it had stopped growing at 4 weeks. It was hard for a bit, wondering what I did wrong. Luckily my doctor was amazing and helped us through this time. I physically recovered quickly, emotionally and mentally took a bit longer.

    Welcome back! Feel free to friend me if you want.
  • chicpower1
    chicpower1 Posts: 169 Member
    I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I cannot say I have walked in your shoes, but I do know the fear and devastation from learning that what was thought to be a healthy pregnancy wasn't the case. We found out our little on had a genetic disorder and a less than 1% chance of survival. She did survive, and is healthy but the entire pregnancy was spent with the counselor in our head saying "you're going to miscarry". Still, that's nothing compared to what you've been through. Feel free to friend me though if you'd like a little extra support. God bless.
  • thegoodner
    thegoodner Posts: 113 Member
    I am so sorry for your loss. Losing a baby is difficult, losing your tube just adds insult to a painful injury. I have had a couple of miscarriages and have lost an ovary/tube as well, so I can empathize....but I would say dare to HOPE! Work on being the best you that you can be now. We are all here to support you and watch your success!
  • emmyvera
    emmyvera Posts: 599 Member
    So sorry to read your post.

    We are so glad to have you back!!

    You have a wonderful positive attitude and that speaks volumes! :happy:
  • tanyizzle
    tanyizzle Posts: 56 Member
    I am so sorry for your loss. I was pregnant back in November. I was 12 weeks pregnant and I went into full on labor. (who goes into labor at 12 weeks?) I lost my baby the day before thanksgiving :( After I recovered I joined a gym and started working on ME. Best thing i have ever done. I am now 51lbs down. :) Feel free to add me as a friend. Again I am so sorry for your loss.
  • ejmcam
    ejmcam Posts: 533 Member
    So sorry for your loss! I also lost a baby in January that was a surprise....but not unwanted. It was not ectopic, so there was no surgery involved. But I had just started to get used to the idea of a 3rd baby when I miscarried. Its kind of what motivated me to get my butt in shape, the thought of gaining more baby weight on top of what I had not lost. Best of luck, and welcome back!
  • OneFitMom_
    OneFitMom_ Posts: 151 Member
    Aww...........your story breaks my heart. My husband and I tried for years to conceive. I had my first miscarriage when I was 5 weeks along. I then became pregnant again and found out on the anniversary of my last miscarriage that I had a blighted ovum. I was 8 weeks along and went in for a DNC the next day. My doctor suggested I have chromosomal testing done to determine why I was miscarrying. I later found out that it was just a fluke and there was nothing wrong with me. I also found out that my 2nd baby was a little girl. I was completely depressed for the longest time. Eventually I made myself get back into working out and feeling better about myself. My husband and I went on vacation in March of 2009 and when we came home I found out I was pregnant. I was scared to death to have another miscarriage. I had to go to the doctors a couple times a week to have my hcg levels tested and was put on prometrium. I ended up having a big baby boy at 40 weeks, weighing 9.7 lbs. He is my main reason for getting back into shape and living a healthier lifestyle. Best of luck to you!
  • TayJoMama
    TayJoMama Posts: 348 Member
    So sorry to hear that. Maybe focusing on yourself will help with the grief process. Reminds me a little of Abby on the Biggest Loser a couple of seasons ago. Welcome back.:flowerforyou:
  • jllipson
    jllipson Posts: 646
    I'm so sorry for your loss. I didn't have ectopic, but I have lost 3 babies (all within 1 year), but on the happy note, 2 months after losing my 3rd baby I became pregnant for the 4th time - I now have a happy healthy 5 year old. I also had another little girl 2 1/2 years ago.

    I am sending a friend request, that way if you need to chat, you can send me private messages...
  • MissAnjy
    MissAnjy Posts: 2,480 Member
    I'm sorry for your loss :(
    Make sure you allow yourself to grieve, even if people around you don't understand what you're feeling. That was your baby, it was a life, take the time you need to cope with that.

    I had a miscarriage at 9 weeks pregnant and I suffered in silence for a very long time. My doctor believed I never really dealt with the loss (and I probably didn't because the father was very emotionally abusive & made fun of how I felt because It didn't impact him at all). That's why I say, don't let anyone around you dictate how you should feel about the loss. I struggled because I didn't let myself grieve the way I should have. I understand the devastation, if you need to talk, I'm here for you.
  • janemartin02
    janemartin02 Posts: 2,653 Member
    So sorry for your loss.You can do this.
    Good luck!!
    jane:flowerforyou:
  • brit49
    brit49 Posts: 461 Member
    Sorry for your loss. Welcome back. All the best on your weight loss journey
  • harleydall76
    harleydall76 Posts: 586 Member
    (((hugs))) I am so sorry for your loss and unfortunately I HAVE walked in your shoes and know how awful it is.

    Good luck on your weight loss journey!
  • maureensm
    maureensm Posts: 183 Member
    So sorry to hear of your devestating loss. I cannot directly relate but I did have a preganancy scare when I was 7 weeks along and the fear was crippling. As a parent, the fear of losing your child is immeasurable. I cannot imagine the pain you and other ladies who have responded to you have gone through. I do think you will find a treasure trove of support here and I wish you luck.
  • randisaucier
    randisaucier Posts: 178 Member
    Very sorry for your loss! Welcome back, wishing you tons of success on your journey!
  • gcineas
    gcineas Posts: 121
    you can do this!!
  • fmorpurgo
    fmorpurgo Posts: 32
    Wow, I expect you are overwhelmed with this fantastic amount of support you are getting from this community, but just to say I understand how you are feeling as I too have been through something similar, if you want to add me, please feel free.
    Very strong coming back after such a short time-well done :flowerforyou:
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