One year in and down 120 lbs

So it's been exactly one year since I began my most successful weight-loss journey to date. I remember the date because it coincided with my highest weight ever measured. I was 315 lbs on 3/15. I can vividly remember those nights of sitting in my La-Z-Boy just feeling miserable after consuming the poison of the night - Whataburger, Papa John's, Big Macs... Every time I would have zero concern beforehand. But regret would follow soon after as I sat wheezing in a semi-comatose state.

My typical daily diet for the longest time was a Whataburger sausage, egg and cheese biscuit meal deal (or a Hippo burrito) in the morning, sometimes followed by a mid-morning donut snack. At lunch I would go to Jack-in-the-Box, Cici's Pizza, or Taco Bell. Every day after work I would stop at Sonic for a large shake. Dinner time was usually a Whataburger #5 bacon cheeseburger meal (What-A-Sized, of course), then I would get the munchies later in the night and eat Blue Bell with bananas or crumbled cookies on top. Sometime after that I would go to bed only to wake up an hour later with the sour taste of bile as the acid reflux hit. It shames me now to read what I just wrote, but it is the truth.

But then on March 15th something clicked. Maybe it was the final straw, maybe the planets aligned themselves just right, but I decided to just focus on one thing - calories. My reasoning was that the problem started in morning with the biscuits and Hippos, and I would just figure that the day was already ruined so I might as well plan on starting the diet "tomorrow".

So for my new strategy the plan was to track my calories using MyFitnessPal and stick to my calorie budget. I first went to GNC and picked up some protein shake mix to start off my day. Every day I would drink a protein shake in the morning, then I would go to Subway for lunch and again for dinner. A note about Subway: in the old days for me Subway meant a Footlong meatball sub with extra cheese. I knew those were still bad, so this time (after obsessing over the Subway nutrition chart) I started getting a six inch turkey on wheat with mustard and no cheese. For snacks I started a fruit and sunflower seed habit. Of course, this diet was not enough. I remember the early days of sitting in agony while trying to ignore the hunger pangs. But I made it through those times with the help of tons of apples, "Lil Cuties" oranges, and whole packages of strawberries. And wouldn't you know it, the plan worked! Once I started building weight loss momentum I became more emboldened and got even more aggressive with my calorie budget, and it got easier and easier as I forgot about those bad greasy foods. I learned to enjoy how great a homemade chicken breast sandwich can be, and I still love the taste of a nice Fuji apple.

Today I consider myself to be a completely different person - not only do I look different but my attitude has improved tremendously. I am more confident and pleasant to be around since I don't hate myself so much anymore, I take vitamins, and I am now able to do so much more.

There is another component to my success - After a couple of months of success losing weight I started to seriously seek ways to become more active. On the internet I kept seeing testimonials from people who had lost a lot of weight through diet alone and one regret that kept popping up was that they wished they had started working out right away. So my plan was to find something that seemed more interesting besides going to the gym every day. Besides, I was honestly pretty intimidated by all of the regular gym people with their bubble muscles, glares, and grunting.

So for a few years I had been seeing FB posts from a high school friend about a local MMA gym and while it always seemed cool and tough, I never got around to come check it out. I finally made up my mind to go see what it was like and as luck would have it they had lost their lease on the building and were not operational. I was disappointed but also was still in that mindset that I wanted to do something, anything.

I mustered up the courage to get out of my comfort zone and walked through the doors of a local Brazilian Jiu Jitsu gym. I had no clue what Jiu Jitsu was; I figured it was some form of MMA and maybe hitting stuff would be a good stress reliever. Anyway, I walked in to see the whole room consists of a big mat with what looked like people wrestling in Karate suits (Gis) all over the place. To make a long story short, a few days later I found myself in a Gi, on the mat, trying to get someone to tap out from being choked while avoiding being choked. It was wonderful. And for the next few months I worked harder than I had ever imagined, over and over for five minutes at a time. The pounds just melted off.

Side Note: Some of you know this but for many years I have been a germaphobe with a very large personal space bubble. If we were in a Mexican restaurant eating and I saw you double-dipping chips I would come down upon you with great wrath and vengeance. In a normal room setting you could literally scoot me around the room by leaning in to me real close. Therefore, in true "Face Your Fears" fashion, Jiu Jitsu with all of its sweaty man-hugging helped me to overcome the personal bubble thing.

This was huge for me, and I began to consider other things that scared me in my life like being embarrassed in public. I eventually decided to face my fears. All of them. I got my first tattoo. I made a song video and posted it on FB. I took a selfie with a goat. And I started going to the gym to lift weights.
Now I know how all of this looks: "mid-life crisis". Maybe that is what is really is, but to me all of these things are therapy.

So I started going to the gym regularly. I soon figured out that all of the gym regulars weren't judging me or laughing at me and that nobody really even cared that I had to start out using the plastic aerobics weights. The important thing was that I developed a habit and routine to try and come in every day. Today if I have to miss a gym day due to my schedule I feel irritated, like I'm missing something.

As of now I still am working to reach my goal. According to the BMI charts I am still at least 20 lbs overweight. I still have this weird skin flap where my spare belly tire used to be, and I still have moobs (at least now they are an A-cup rather than a C-cup). But I feel great and am doing things that I never thought I could ever do: I can run an 8-minute mile, lift over 400 lbs, run the 300-meter in 36 seconds, hold a plank for over two minutes, and do 3 overhand pullups. No longer do I wonder if I can do something; I try. And if I try and fail, I seek to improve.