Is love a feeling or a decision?

Memmons239
Memmons239 Posts: 14 Member
edited November 30 in Chit-Chat
I was debating about this with my friends the other night (I know this isn't fitness related) but love is a part of your well being :) So is it a Feeling or a Decision? OR What comes first, the decision or the Feeling?

Replies

  • chaney3000
    chaney3000 Posts: 269 Member
    True love is a feeling. The decision is whether or not you stay with them. Parent child is a great example. You love your parents but you make the decision to leave them eventually.

    Not to say that feelings can't change or become supressed. Falling in love or growing apart.
  • wannab3thinner
    wannab3thinner Posts: 118 Member
    A little of both. I think it starts with a feeling but you reaffirm it by making it a decision. The warm and fluttery feelings don't always stay that way, and you have to decide to continue loving the person and work at overcoming obstacles together. I think making that decision to stick through it with the person can actually reinforce the warm happy feelings when you overcome things as a pair.
  • mamajkeach
    mamajkeach Posts: 1,275 Member
    Both, but true love is a choice. Choosing to be kind to someone when they dont deserve it...that's love.
  • rockgoddess2016
    rockgoddess2016 Posts: 8,663 Member
    edited April 2016
    It's a feeling. How you treat it, a decison
  • StrongAndHealthyMommy
    StrongAndHealthyMommy Posts: 1,255 Member
    You decide to open up and give someone the opportunity to know you. But love is a feeling that could be develop with the person you decided to give the opportunity of being around you
  • Jruzer
    Jruzer Posts: 3,501 Member
    Love is not one thing and can't be so easily delineated. The Greeks spoke of many kinds of love including Eros (sexual love), Philia ("brotherly love"), Pragma (longstanding love as between older couples), and Agape (selfless love). These are all mixes of feelings and decisions. How you love your spouse is different from how you love your children is different from how you love your dog, or your country, or God.
  • drpsamin
    drpsamin Posts: 265 Member
    feeling :D
    I
  • camy4dfied
    camy4dfied Posts: 26 Member
    I think it's both.
  • mamajkeach
    mamajkeach Posts: 1,275 Member
    Jruzer wrote: »
    Love is not one thing and can't be so easily delineated. The Greeks spoke of many kinds of love including Eros (sexual love), Philia ("brotherly love"), Pragma (longstanding love as between older couples), and Agape (selfless love). These are all mixes of feelings and decisions. How you love your spouse is different from how you love your children is different from how you love your dog, or your country, or God.

    Yes. This!
  • pichiPurinsesu
    pichiPurinsesu Posts: 776 Member
    edited April 2016
    i think it's both; but i think the feeling of love becomes before the decision to define it as love.
  • Matt200goal
    Matt200goal Posts: 481 Member
    Yes & yes, plus it's an action too.
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  • strozman
    strozman Posts: 2,622 Member
    Feeling. God I wish I could decide to love or not love someone
  • sarahfadell87
    sarahfadell87 Posts: 182 Member
    I don't think it's a decision at all, as far as romantic love.. I think it just happens.

    And also that it usually hurts. Lol
  • lesleyloo7879
    lesleyloo7879 Posts: 439 Member
    I think it is a feeling, true love ....love at first site I never knew what that was till I held my kids for the first time. It was not a decision it was an almost overwhelming feeling.
  • JustMissTracy
    JustMissTracy Posts: 6,338 Member
    mamajkeach wrote: »
    Both, but true love is a choice. Choosing to be kind to someone when they dont deserve it...that's love.

    That actually sounds like self abuse...if they don't deserve it, why would you choose to be kind?
  • Jruzer
    Jruzer Posts: 3,501 Member
    mamajkeach wrote: »
    Both, but true love is a choice. Choosing to be kind to someone when they dont deserve it...that's love.

    That actually sounds like self abuse...if they don't deserve it, why would you choose to be kind?

    There are many moral teachers that hold that you are supposed to love those who don't deserve it. I won't name one in particular but I think we all know who I mean.
  • let_me_clip_dirty_wings
    let_me_clip_dirty_wings Posts: 2,910 Member
    Both - If you tend to be more logical than emotional, it's a decision - If it's the other way around, it's a feeling...
  • jenovatrix
    jenovatrix Posts: 219 Member
    A wise woman once said love is a battlefield.
  • AnotherTry2016
    AnotherTry2016 Posts: 785 Member
    It for sure a combination, but once it sets in is there really any control?
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    It's neither. It's a trap.
  • mkakids
    mkakids Posts: 1,913 Member
    Its initally a feeling then a decision to continue to cultivate a relationship that keepa both members happy.
  • wilsoncl6
    wilsoncl6 Posts: 1,280 Member
    Love is a natural body reaction caused by a stimulus that we each individually define as love. Scientists have already shown that the physiological reactions occur first and then we mentally establish an emotional equivalent to that reaction. Basically, it all boils down to how are bodies are conditioned to respond to certain stimulus and how each one of us have learned to assign an emotional equivalency to that reaction. The stronger the physiological reaction, and the longer it goes on, the stronger the defined emotional response.

    My opinion, it's a feeling stimulated by chemical and hormonal responses in our bodies. You feel it because your body reacts to the stimulus.
  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,834 Member
    Love is a feeling. Staying with someone is a commitment you make every day
  • JustMissTracy
    JustMissTracy Posts: 6,338 Member
    edited April 2016
    Jruzer wrote: »
    mamajkeach wrote: »
    Both, but true love is a choice. Choosing to be kind to someone when they dont deserve it...that's love.

    That actually sounds like self abuse...if they don't deserve it, why would you choose to be kind?

    There are many moral teachers that hold that you are supposed to love those who don't deserve it. I won't name one in particular but I think we all know who I mean.

    I didn't say don't love them. I don't believe we have much choice there. But to be kind to someone "who doesn't deserve it" is a completely different thing. The name you are not mentioning "forgives" even those who may not deserve it, that's him, he doesn't have to live this life. Also, on that note, this is the same man who allowed those that he loved and forgave to kill him. That's if we're talking about the same teacher....
  • salembambi
    salembambi Posts: 5,585 Member
    a feeling

    if i could decide to be in love or love someone i'd be married right now

  • jlc102980
    jlc102980 Posts: 137 Member
    A little of both. I think it starts with a feeling but you reaffirm it by making it a decision. The warm and fluttery feelings don't always stay that way, and you have to decide to continue loving the person and work at overcoming obstacles together. I think making that decision to stick through it with the person can actually reinforce the warm happy feelings when you overcome things as a pair.

    A hundred times this
  • Jruzer
    Jruzer Posts: 3,501 Member
    Jruzer wrote: »
    mamajkeach wrote: »
    Both, but true love is a choice. Choosing to be kind to someone when they dont deserve it...that's love.

    That actually sounds like self abuse...if they don't deserve it, why would you choose to be kind?

    There are many moral teachers that hold that you are supposed to love those who don't deserve it. I won't name one in particular but I think we all know who I mean.

    I didn't say don't love them. I don't believe we have much choice there. But to be kind to someone "who doesn't deserve it" is a completely different thing. The name you are not mentioning "forgives" even those who may not deserve it, that's him, he doesn't have to live this life. Also, on that note, this is the same man who allowed those that he loved and forgave to kill him. That's if we're talking about the same teacher....

    I'm not quite sure what you'e after here and I really don't want to argue. You do not have to follow any teaching with which you disagree.

    But if you're an adherent of this sect, the teaching says that you should do good to those who hate you, to forgive those who hurt you, and to follow the teacher and do as he did. Later adherents and writers of this sect talked about how the teacher's death at the hands of his enemies was actually a victory.
This discussion has been closed.