Switching to maintenance and feeling guilty.

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  • Domicinator
    Domicinator Posts: 261 Member
    oocdc2 wrote: »
    Domicinator wrote: »
    I'm finding that maintenance suits me. The guilt and worry I feel about eating more calories per day--completely unfounded. First of all I'm finding that just having the OPTION to eat those extra couple hundred calories a day is really nice, even if I don't necessarily eat all of them. I think my diet fatigue wasn't so much about being hungry, but more about psychologically being tired of feeling restricted. I'm usually not hungry enough to eat all the way up to the maintenance line, even after lots of exercise.

    My weight is going up and down between 175 and 177. I know it's just been a few days, and that's not enough to spot any consistent trends, but it's remaining stable for now. What also helped my mental state was going shopping for new warm weather clothes over the weekend and finding that I am now a size 32 waist and a medium for shirts. At this time last year, I was anywhere from 38 to 40 for pants, and a 2XL for most shirts.

    I'm glad you're coming to peace with this; I'm struggling with this, too. As it turns out, it's actually easy (logistically speaking) to lose weight when you have a method and time. But holding what you got? Trying to find that sweet spot, which is going to fluctuate depending on what your body's doing and what you're asking it to do? It does scare me a little.
    I reduced my losing weight goal a few weeks ago from 1 lb. a week to 0.5, which gained me 50 cal./day (A half a hard pretzel! Hope I don't spend it all in one place...), but it took the edge off of the maintenance anxiety. I also recognize that I'm going to have to weight myself regularly for the long haul. I wish you well!

    I know that feeling for sure. I've been at the .5 lb per week mark for several months now. It's like a last stepping stone toward maintenance, but it does still work for weight loss. I actually lost faster than what MFP said I would. I think it was in February where I lost 4 lbs during the month when I really should have only lost 2.
  • Domicinator
    Domicinator Posts: 261 Member
    hollen_carol wrote: »
    So proud of the wonderful job you have done!!! Congrats to you. I started on maintenance in October because I felt the same exact way you do now. I still wanted 10 more pounds at that time but i just could not eat at deficit anymore. Sometimes I really do think it is all in our heads. When I upped the calories to maintenance, I did great. I always stay under that calorie amount fairly easily unless we go out to dinner with friends and are drinking alcohol as well as enjoying the food. I lost weight anyway during these past few months. I now just have 5 more pounds to go to get to that ultimate goal weight. I am hoping by the end of September this year I will be there. I am trying very much to just enjoy the ride at this point. By nature, I am just too impatient.

    Thank you!

    Your story is very encouraging. I envision that's probably about the way it's going to go for me too. With some of the pressure off to stay at or under 1900 calories a day, I feel a lot more relaxed and less neurotic about what I eat during the day. I'm still sticking very strictly to my food log in MFP, but I think that's going to be a part of my life for the long haul. I have absolutely no concept of portion control if I'm not logging.
  • LivingtheLeanDream
    LivingtheLeanDream Posts: 13,342 Member
    Congrats on reaching goal :smile: don't feel guilty! enjoy the extra calories and enjoy maintenance...its sweeeeeet! :smiley:
  • melsouth1972
    melsouth1972 Posts: 198 Member
    I know how you feel - I've reached maintenance and I'm finding it really hard to eat more because of the guilt. Feel free to add me I could do with friends on maintenance for support and motivation
  • fiddletime
    fiddletime Posts: 1,868 Member
    I got to 123, but was 3# short of goal. After a month I decided that my body really didn't want to get to 120 (can we say major mind games?). I declared myself in maintenance 3 months ago and am very happy to not have yo-yo'd back up. Every day I log and every week I maintain, is an accomplishment. It's also getting easier for me. I do plan on sneaking down to 120, but will wait for summer. I go up and down about 2# depending on weekends usually.
  • victoria_1024
    victoria_1024 Posts: 915 Member
    I am in your shoes!! I got to my goal of 128 after losing 85 lbs. I definitely have more body fat I could lose and I keep thinking I should lose another ten. But I'm kinda exhausted from it all. I keep going back and forth so some days I'll eat at a deficit and then I'll have a day like today where I end up eating above maintenance because i just don't care. I think maybe I'd have better luck just switching to maintenance. My motivation to lose weight is pretty low. I am happy with how I look and in a healthy weight range so it really doesn't matter that I still have more body fat than I'd like. I can always start again in a few months. It's hard for me to shut off diet mode though.
  • Domicinator
    Domicinator Posts: 261 Member
    victoria_1024 wrote: »
    I am in your shoes!! I got to my goal of 128 after losing 85 lbs. I definitely have more body fat I could lose and I keep thinking I should lose another ten. But I'm kinda exhausted from it all. I keep going back and forth so some days I'll eat at a deficit and then I'll have a day like today where I end up eating above maintenance because i just don't care. I think maybe I'd have better luck just switching to maintenance. My motivation to lose weight is pretty low. I am happy with how I look and in a healthy weight range so it really doesn't matter that I still have more body fat than I'd like. I can always start again in a few months. It's hard for me to shut off diet mode though.

    I have been eating at or below maintenance for about a week and my weight is fluctuating up and down between 175 and 177, which I'm totally ok with. I'm trying to get more regular exercise in too, now that I have a better chance of building up some muscle. I use an AirDyne AD-6 exercise bike, which works the upper AND lower body, so I'm hoping to get some tone in my puny arms. ;)

    Now, I just need the weather to get its act together so I can get my REAL bike out and start riding every day!
  • FabianRodriguez94
    FabianRodriguez94 Posts: 221 Member
    I have lost 85 lbs over the course of 2 years and have just recently booked myself a date for a tummy tuck due to a bunch of loose skin. My surgery is in about a month and a half and I have put my calorie goal to maintain. I am exhausted from being in a constant deficit for 2 years and I am giving myself the mental rest that I so desperately need. It feels great to not be so hungry all the time and my strength training has definitely gotten less difficult. I will be at maintenance until about 6 weeks after my surgery when I am able to get back into the gym. Then I will begin my first ever bulk (or maybe cut a bit more).
  • jessicagosz
    jessicagosz Posts: 9 Member
    edited March 2016
    :)
  • ARGriffy
    ARGriffy Posts: 1,002 Member
    oocdc2 wrote: »
    I also recognize that I'm going to have to weight myself regularly for the long haul. I wish you well!

    I weigh about every 2 weeks, or, when I feel particularly thin, or when I feel bloated and worried i may have gained! Sometimes i go a month between weigh ins. I've been maintaining for well over a year now and haven't "gained" more than 7 lbs in that time, which always bounced back down anyway. good luck!
  • Domicinator
    Domicinator Posts: 261 Member
    Well, it's been a little over 3 weeks of maintenance for me. I didn't do anything fancy like reverse dieting or any of that. I just put MFP on maintenance and decided to see what happens and go from there. Starting weight when I originally posted this thread? 175 lbs. Weight this morning? 175 lbs. I have literally done nothing other than continue logging but eating what MFP says should be maintenance calories.

    The logging doesn't bother me at all. It's just something I consider to be part of life now, and with my trusty kitchen scale, it's just second nature at this point to weigh everything I eat. I've also found that my appetite is generally less at the end of the day and I'm snacking less during the day. In general I'm just less hungry at meal times and snack times because when I do eat, I can eat a little more. I still do a cheat dinner once a week, usually on Saturday nights, and they have not affected me negatively at all, other than that they're usually salty and make me retain a little water weight for a couple days.

    I know three weeks isn't super long to judge whether or not I'm successfully maintaining, but so far, it feels easier than eating at a defecit. I kind of love it!
  • BernieMBurke
    BernieMBurke Posts: 206 Member
    So, I have been in maintenance for 3 months. I still feel guilty, so I know what the OP says. I've actually lost 5 more lbs since then. I have stepped up my exercise, so that might explain some of it. Still, MFP is giving me 2,480 calories just to maintain before exercise. On top of that, my exercise from (cardio from Fitbit Charge HR) is adding in another 1,300-2,000 calories. I'm eating around 3,000 calories a day, which is a little low to maintain. Still, I'm watching my macros to make sure I'm getting enough protein and fats (don't worry about carbs to much). Also, trying to keep my sugar and especially sodium in check.
  • RogerToo
    RogerToo Posts: 16,157 Member
    Domicinator wrote: »
    A few days ago, I hit my goal weight of 175 lbs. I thought I might move the goal post again and try for 165 lbs., but to be completely honest, I'm tired of losing weight. Like, REALLY tired of it. It's starting to wear on me, and I feel like if I try pushing myself down another 10 lbs. I will be miserable. What I'd like to do is set MFP to maintenance, try to come in slightly under that number every day, and also try not to eat back my calories from exercise. In fact, I'm thinking about turning off the steps and exercise syncing from my Apple Watch so that I don't focus so much on that equation.

    My problem is that I feel guilty. I guess it kind of feels like I'm quitting. I fully recognize that losing 75 lbs. is a big deal, and that going to maintenance after reaching my goal weight is absolutely opposite of quitting. I guess what makes it feel like I'm quitting is that I'm giving into my urge to eat a couple hundred more calories a day. I'm tired of going to bed with my stomach growling and feeling miserable because I can't eat a little more at dinner.

    What I'm trying to focus on now is that now that I'm planning to maintain, there may be physical results from exercise. Like I can focus on muscle tone and getting a little less "squishy" in the middle. I'm hoping that's enough to keep me motivated. I don't want to gain this weight back. So there it is--a little bit of fear and a little bit of guilt.

    Hi
    I am where You are, the last 10 or 15 pounds is in sight but after two plus years of dieting I have decided to take a vacation from dieting for a few months and then come back to it again.

    I do not think of it as quitting, more that I think of it as letting my body catch up with the weight loss as it has been 2 plus years of losing and I believe that keeping up the exercise with the same weight will let my body get into better shape.

    I have added a extra fruit or small dessert each day from what I was eating to lose weight. So far that seems to be working as I am at the same weight as I was in early February.

    Good Luck
    Roger
  • Orphia
    Orphia Posts: 7,097 Member
    Domicinator wrote: »
    Well, it's been a little over 3 weeks of maintenance for me. I didn't do anything fancy like reverse dieting or any of that. I just put MFP on maintenance and decided to see what happens and go from there. Starting weight when I originally posted this thread? 175 lbs. Weight this morning? 175 lbs. I have literally done nothing other than continue logging but eating what MFP says should be maintenance calories.

    The logging doesn't bother me at all. It's just something I consider to be part of life now, and with my trusty kitchen scale, it's just second nature at this point to weigh everything I eat. I've also found that my appetite is generally less at the end of the day and I'm snacking less during the day. In general I'm just less hungry at meal times and snack times because when I do eat, I can eat a little more. I still do a cheat dinner once a week, usually on Saturday nights, and they have not affected me negatively at all, other than that they're usually salty and make me retain a little water weight for a couple days.

    I know three weeks isn't super long to judge whether or not I'm successfully maintaining, but so far, it feels easier than eating at a defecit. I kind of love it!

    This is great to hear! Good for you.
  • srecupid
    srecupid Posts: 660 Member
    Pretty much same boat but, 5 pounds short of original goal. People keep telling me I don't need to lose more weight but, I'm still above normal bmi range but, i'm just kinda sick of it. Mondays are my official weigh in days so I'll see where i'm at in the morning.
  • Domicinator
    Domicinator Posts: 261 Member
    I weighed in this morning and was at 173 lbs. That's 2 lbs. lighter than what I was when I started maintenance. I haven't been trying to lose more weight, but I have been trying to not go right up to the limit of my maintenance calories. Some days I'm up to 200 calories shy of maintenance because I'm just not hungry enough to want to eat the other 200. I bank them for a snack later, but I often don't eat the snack because my appetite has been so much more under control. Usually around dinner time I'm famished, and lately that has not been the case.
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