Insecurity and negative thoughts

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Pinkranger626
Pinkranger626 Posts: 460 Member
in Motivation and Support
For the record, I try to be positive. I am constantly talking to clients about healthy living and self love etc. etc. Lately I've been struggling. I've gained more weight than I'd ever be comfortable with, but I seem to have finally gotten my diet back under control and my exercise is certainly not lacking.

I recently hired a running coach to help me train for the Dopey Challenge in Disney 2017, which is a HUGE, scary goal of mine. I'm excited, and I'm seeing progress in my fitness abilities. Part of my reason for doing these sorts of things is to push myself out of my comfort zones. One of which has been going to the group track workouts each week. This week was my second workout and it was much better than the first one. However, it's still not something that I'm super comfortable with yet. I look forward to it each week because it's a great workout and I know it's going to make me a better runner. But it definitely has brought back a lot of memories from high school gym class. In high school I was heavy, I wasn't into sports AT ALL. I was also in a verbally and emotionally abusive relationship which is where I think a lot of the thoughts and insecurities that are suddenly coming up came from.

I'm not a fast runner, and speed workouts are hard for me. Ironically I can teach HIIT classes, kickboxing, etc and go forever, but 200s are my kryptonite. Anyway, I've been having thoughts like not being a real athlete (I completed a marathon this year... so definitely NOT true), being down on myself because I'm the slowest one etc. This in turn has triggered some self hate about my current weight and weight loss or lack there of, even though I know that it's not going to come off over night and I am seeing results.

I guess this post is mostly to put my feelings out there, acknowledge them, and figure out a way to keep moving forward. But also to let others know, even as someone who lives and breathes health and fitness, it's not always easy, it doesn't come naturally to everyone. And you are not alone.

Replies

  • JustMissTracy
    JustMissTracy Posts: 6,339 Member
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    Aw, I'm sorry you're feeling this way about yourself..It sounds like you are doing all the right things, just gotta wrap your brain around the journey and accept that it's going to take time. I wish you the best xo
  • Pinkranger626
    Pinkranger626 Posts: 460 Member
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    Thanks! The hardest part of life is getting out of your head about things
  • suzyjane1972
    suzyjane1972 Posts: 612 Member
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    Remember......your head lies.....mine does a lot but you have to tell it to shut the f up.....
  • Believeinme35
    Believeinme35 Posts: 24 Member
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    That's how I feel this morning but I Repeat after myself..... I CAN do this
  • distinctlybeautiful
    distinctlybeautiful Posts: 1,041 Member
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    You just made me remember a technique I used to use.. when I was able to catch myself before those thoughts took over, that is. I'd ask myself what I would tell my child if s/he came to me with the problems I'm facing or came to me saying that kind of negative stuff about him/herself. Now, I don't have kids yet, but I know I'd be a lot more kind and forgiving and encouraging to them than I am with myself, that's for sure. Thanks for reminding me!
  • JordanHealthCoach
    JordanHealthCoach Posts: 14 Member
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    I really relate to this, so thanks for posting. I'm a wellness coordinator and health coach and I, too, struggle with my weight and self-confidence around it. It makes me think "if I can't even do it, how can I think other will be able to!?" BUT everyone is on a different journey. We are exactly where we need to be. Feel free to friend me if you'd like :)
  • woznube7
    woznube7 Posts: 550 Member
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    @workoutgrl87 This is similar to how I am feeling. YOU CAN!!! :)

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