Lost all hope of recovering.

I ruined months of hard work in a two month span of consecutive binge eating everyday day. I'm higher than my starting weight, and I feel disgusting. I can't stop binging no matter how healthy I eat! I'm not restricting I allowed myself one piece of my moms carrot cake! There's going to be a lot of food tomorrow I'm probably just going to starve myself. My weight makes me binge note since I'm not worried about getting fat as I already am . I'm 5'2 almost 125 from 95 lbs. I'm on hold for therapy but I'm just sinking deeper and deeper. My joints hurt from the weight gain in a short amount of time. I don't even want to go out or see family or do anything but cry. I was so fit so in control. I see obese people with binge eating and I get panic attacks as I will become obese. I don't want my mom to go through having a daughter that will be immobile. My family keeps buying trigger foods, and if there's no trigger foods I binge on cereal and bread for Petes sake! I feel like something is controlling me. I know I'll be judged for this weight gain. I prob won't fit the dress I was supposed to wear tomorrow for Mother's Day. Screw trying to look nice tomorrow

Replies

  • Racheldasilva174
    Racheldasilva174 Posts: 87 Member
    More not note*
  • Arathels
    Arathels Posts: 6,883 Member
    Uhh at 5'2 125 lbs is a good weight and you should not be under 103 lbs.

    I think you're being way to harsh on your self. You're not fat, not according to your height and weight and you're definitely not fat. Do you think you might have an eating disorder?
    I think you should talk to your parents about this or someone close to you that can help you :)
  • flower8330
    flower8330 Posts: 7 Member
    You should see a dr or therapist
  • JanetMMcC
    JanetMMcC Posts: 410 Member
    When you say you're on hold for therapy - does that mean you're on a waiting list? Is there anyone you can call about that? Bingeing, weeping, feeling out of control, having panic attacks - that's a scary way to live. And telling yourself that you'll become immobilizingly obese is immobilizing you now. I'm glad you're trying to get help.

    Bingeing doesn't mean that you cannot take control, or that you must become obese. You've been in control before, and you can do it again. I'm not a good person to tell you how, because I was a frequent eater rather than a binge eater. I just know that you can do again what you've done before.