Motivating Myself

kbakhtawar69
kbakhtawar69 Posts: 40 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
UGH!!!! I'm just so frustrated! I'm so jealous of the people that can motivate themselves to lose weight! It hurts when my mom gives me a disappointing look when she looks at my body. I feel like I let her down, and I don't like that feeling. Its making me reach my breaking point. I want to make my mom proud again. Of course I know she loves me, but I still want to make her happy and proud of me. I want to lose this weight not only for her, but for me, too. BUT I JUST CAN'T!! No matter what, I'm always off track!!! Its just so frustrating that I want to hole up in a corner and cry! Guys PLEASE motivate me please! Evidently, I can't motivate myself!

Replies

  • Annr
    Annr Posts: 2,765 Member
    Let me put my Mom hat on, #1 because I am old... lol and #2 because I have been there. I had a mom that was Betty Crocker perfect, and pleasing was all I was trying to do. Looking back with grown-up perspectives I can see now, she was just doing her best with what she was given. You are almost an adult, so pretty soon her demands on you to be a certain way will not have an affect on you. You will please yourself, make your self happy, and not settle. So I would imagine you still live at home, which is hard. Only you can change how you are treated in this life. Only you can stand up and say I will not tolerate you belittling me with my weight. Constructive criticism is what you wish from her. Pretty soon the relationship with your mom will be more even...not child and mom, but just two adults. When that happens its liberating. Let me leave you with some great sayings you can plaster on the refrigerator:

    Nothing tastes as good as healthy feels.

    You don't have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great!

    Losing weight isn't the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to losing weight.

    Instead of eliminating food, eliminate the escape.

    Ok, now get to it. Fail to Prepare then prepare to fail. Make an area in the kitchen that is your foods, log every day. Write in a journal and let go of any stress you are feeling. When you write it down it has no hold on you.

    :-)
  • pondee629
    pondee629 Posts: 2,469 Member
    "I still want to make her happy and proud of me. I want to lose this weight not only for her, but for me, too."

    Do you really? You know what you need to do and what you need to avoid. Just do it. For you (and your Mom).



  • quatermore
    quatermore Posts: 96 Member
    You need to believe in yourself. Most importantly be kind to yourself. If you get off track, pick yourself up and keep at it. Please don’t compare yourself to others. This is your journey, and it’s going to take however long it takes. I have used this quote for motivation: The first step to getting anywhere is deciding you’re not willing to stay where you are. Good luck!
  • LoveEpifanie
    LoveEpifanie Posts: 37 Member
    Some of the things that motivate me the most are quotes like, "I never have to start over if I never quit" and "The days are going to pass anyway, will I be healthier or the same once they do?" These same things may not motivate you though. I love reading through these message boards, /r/loseit on reddit, weight loss youtube videos and tumblr weight loss blogs to find things to keep me motivated. I like to write them down in some way to remind myself.

    Also, maybe you are trying to jump in all once trying to fix everything. That didn't work for me. I started off slow with cutting out drinks with calories. I prefer water now but diet drinks will also help. Then I cut out fast food. The process continued until I was able to control these new habits. Maybe start with accessing your main problem area with food and seeing what you could do to make it better in the long term. Remember one mess up isn't going to ruin everything you have worked for. Pick yourself back up and try again the next day.
  • janjunie
    janjunie Posts: 1,200 Member
    If you want to lose weight for yourself that's great, but as soon as you do it to please someone else, it almost becomes pointless. There are a lot of emotions involved in losing weight, the high of the number on the scale going down, the lows of plateaus and even gaining a little. I seriously think when you go through those lows (we all have) it'll just cause resentment and bitterness towards the person you are wanting to lose weight for. Some people become so frustrated they just give up, gain more and really resent the person they were losing weight for to begin with.

    As a mom myself, I know it would be my fault if my kids are overweight. My eating habits become their eating habits. Your mom's disapproving looks probably reflect her feelings of some kind of failure. Your lack of motivation probably comes from how you feel your mom disapproves of your weight. Start by talking to her and tell her how her disapproving looks affect you.
  • adcc407
    adcc407 Posts: 8 Member
    Just focus on the end result. If you dont do it for yourself, sooner or later, it all goes to waste.
  • cfritch26
    cfritch26 Posts: 28 Member
    I'm just going to say this about you being worried your mom isn't proud of you...nothing against your mom, but you should never feel like you are letting someone down because of your physical appearance. If you mom makes you feel less than unconditionally loved because you are heavier than she wants, then it is her who is letting you down, not the other way around. There are so many things in this world you can be, and if that one thing is what is keeping someone from being proud of you, then you need to focus on being proud of yourself above everyone else. This journey is never going to be something you are fully successful on if you are doing it for anyone but yourself.

    Lose weight for yourself...be confident in who you are, inside, outside, and everything in between. This has to be something you do for you, otherwise any bump in the road can be so much worse with all that pressure of what others think.

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