Moving, depression and weight gain
grettiej
Posts: 31 Member
Hi guys,
So my husband and I just moved and it's taking me awhile to get used to it. We don't have a set gym yet I don't have a routine and I've got some major depression going on. I've turned to eating.
Before I left I was at about 117lbs now I'm probably up a good 7 lbs, and I feel horrible.
I'm ready to get back on track and would love some new friends and motivation.
Anyone else in a similar boat?
So my husband and I just moved and it's taking me awhile to get used to it. We don't have a set gym yet I don't have a routine and I've got some major depression going on. I've turned to eating.
Before I left I was at about 117lbs now I'm probably up a good 7 lbs, and I feel horrible.
I'm ready to get back on track and would love some new friends and motivation.
Anyone else in a similar boat?
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Replies
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Start logging your food.
Focus on healthy.
Moving is extremely stressful.
Buying and selling a house.
Bad food choices are often made.
Happens to everyone.
Join a gym to start making friends in your new city.
Or find a part time job.
Go for your free yearly checkup (with insurance).
Tell them about your depression so you can have your vitamin d levels checked.3 -
well it's been 2 years now but I moved from OK to CO and left all my family, friends, personal trainer, gym of 8 years. it was so hard to walk into the gym here. I felt so uncomfortable and weak, gained 10 lbs constantly eating. Altitude makes you hungry and sick, blah.
after 9 months of feeling like crap, I finally hired a personal trainer, I print out my food logs from MFP, lost 10 lbs. I only saw her 2 days a week but it was enough motivation for me to start running on the days I didn't see her. I do all this on my lunch hour. take a shower and go back to work. I stopped paying for sessions about 4 months ago and I am still going strong.
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Thank you for your story as well. It's super hard. I'm also far from family and friends. Im a stay at home wife so being alone 10 hours in the day is tough. I'm hoping I can pull myself out of this and get on track again. I feel all the hard work I put in is gone
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Ummm... how tall are you? At 124 lbs, unless you're super short, you're unlikely to be overweight.0
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crazymama2both wrote: »
I understand, and I wasn't trying to be snarky, but there's a health concern to being underweight. I apologize if my wording was offensive or inappropriate in any way. I'll try again:
How tall are you? What is your goal weight and how does that compare to healthy recommendations for your height?0 -
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I'm 5ft2 btw0
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Thank you for your story as well. It's super hard. I'm also far from family and friends. Im a stay at home wife so being alone 10 hours in the day is tough. I'm hoping I can pull myself out of this and get on track again. I feel all the hard work I put in is gone
Get out of the house during the day. Being alone for 10 hours a day, not working, would make me lose my mind very quickly! Even just taking a book to a coffee shop for a few hours, and being around other people may help.
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crazymama2both wrote: »
I understand, and I wasn't trying to be snarky, but there's a health concern to being underweight. I apologize if my wording was offensive or inappropriate in any way. I'll try again:
How tall are you? What is your goal weight and how does that compare to healthy recommendations for your height?
I'm 5ft2 and I got down to almost 115. When we moved last month I fell into a depressive state and can't stop eating, mostly sweets. Gained almost 8lbs in one month. For being short, that's a lot at once. Trying to pull it together to get back into a healthy routine.
Wanted to see if anyone else had similar stories0 -
Thank you for your story as well. It's super hard. I'm also far from family and friends. Im a stay at home wife so being alone 10 hours in the day is tough. I'm hoping I can pull myself out of this and get on track again. I feel all the hard work I put in is gone
Get out of the house during the day. Being alone for 10 hours a day, not working, would make me lose my mind very quickly! Even just taking a book to a coffee shop for a few hours, and being around other people may help.
Man that's exactly what my husband said. Even if it's just a trip to a coffee shop.
To make it worse we moved into a apt complex from hell. We have a family of 6 under us with kids thst scream and slam doors at all hours of the day. That's def contributing to my slump.0 -
Again, my apologies
sincerely, my comment was out of concern, not any kind of ill will. I obviously misread your intent, and the fault is all mine. I did not respond in the best way possible, but wish you luck in your journey! 1 -
GrettieJ - I can relate to what you're going through. I'm recently unemployed after having worked full-time for many (>20) years and am finding the isolation tough to deal with. My husband and I live in the woods and have very few neighbors. He works full-time. After about three weeks of being home by myself during the day, I'm finding myself talking to the cat while I work out in the yard and gardens.
He's not a great conversationalist, but is glad of the attention. lol
I'm finding that if I just stay out of the darned kitchen, that's half my battle. I eat breakfast with my husband (usually flax meal porridge with raspberries from the garden), have a light lunch, and 4 oz. protein with 1 cup vegs for dinner. No snacking. I eat gluten free, low carb, high fat & find that keeps me feeling if not full, at least sated most of the time.
Busy hands. That helps me with not eating everything in sight.
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MaryDeLoria wrote: »GrettieJ - I can relate to what you're going through. I'm recently unemployed after having worked full-time for many (>20) years and am finding the isolation tough to deal with. My husband and I live in the woods and have very few neighbors. He works full-time. After about three weeks of being home by myself during the day, I'm finding myself talking to the cat while I work out in the yard and gardens. He's not a great conversationalist, but is glad of the attention. lol
I'm finding that if I just stay out of the darned kitchen, that's half my battle. I eat breakfast with my husband (usually flax meal porridge with raspberries from the garden), have a light lunch, and 4 oz. protein with 1 cup vegs for dinner. No snacking. I eat gluten free, low carb, high fat & find that keeps me feeling if not full, at least sated most of the time.
Busy hands. That helps me with not eating everything in sight.
Great advice!
Wow, I feel like the animal situation is identical to me.
I have a dog who seriously is my best friend right now. I carry on long conversations with her.
Luckily she doesn't judge when she sees me binge on sweets
Right now the highlight of my dad is my trip to the grocery store.
I wish my husband and I could enjoy breakfast together. He's anti mornings, so even the car ride to his job is in silence.
Your daily diet seems wonderful. I need to find mine, so I can stop feeling like crap mentally and physically.1 -
I'm in a similar situation so I completely understand where you're coming from!
We moved about a 1 1/2 yrs ago from a major TX city (lived there for almost 15 years) to small town MD due to my hubby's job transfer. While I have some people here that I'm friendly with, I have no true friends here like I did in TX (I've always found it hard to make true friends). I was fortunate enough to keep my job and worked out of a sister division office for a few months until that division was sold off and they moved in with their new owners. So now I telecommute full-time from my home office while hubby puts in 14 hour days (12 hours + 1 hour commute both ways). On the weekends I want to get OUT while he wants to stay home and chill so it's been a bit of a compromise there.
You didn't mention what kind of exercises you like to do (running, weights, classes, etc). If there are gyms in your area see if you can get a guest pass to try them out for a few days to find one that you like. We moved to an area that the closest gym is 10-15 miles away and is uber-expensive for what they have available. However, we do have a few decent walking paths (tourist town), so I jog 2-3 miles most mornings instead and now I'm trying to do some body weight exercises during the day - things like 10 push-ups while I wait on a report to run or dumbbell rows when I'm on a conference call (non-video ones obviously!).
I agree with jbee27 - I would go CRAZY here if I didn't at least have this job. On the days that I'm feeling really off and just need to be around people, I pack up work and head to the coffee shop in the neighboring town for a few hours.
Have you looked at adult education programs thru a local community college? I know the one in our area publishes a new class catalog every 3 or 4 months and offers a variety of classes during the days and evenings - foreign languages, painting, photography, cake decorating, fitness, etc.
What about looking for day-time volunteer opportunities or a part-time job? That would at least get you away from the neighbors for a few hours!
Feel free to friend me if you want.1 -
I agree with the idea for volunteering during the day. I'd also suggest looking online, starting with Meet-up or Craigslist, and see if you can find some groups in your area that share your interests. Maybe there is a group that walks some of the local trails together on a weekday morning. Maybe there is a book club(you can check with your local library or book store for this also) or crafting group in your area (local sewing stores around here have monthly get-togethers).
While I haven't moved in a long time, I did have a situation a few years ago where all of my friends were starting to get married & have babies, including my ex-roommate. I went from socializing with my core group of friends 3-4 days a week to once a month, maybe. It took me a long time to deal with that transition, but I did find that trying new things helped. I took a ballroom dance class, for example.
Oh, and I find that many of our local parks have some nature programs that are free, and usually involve some walking while they talk about the local ecosystem. That might help you get out, get moving, and meeting people as well. Hang in there, & good luck.1 -
I can sympathize. My husband and I moved back to the United States after spending three years in Japan for a job, where I stayed at home, due to being on a dependent visa. While in Japan, I filled my time with sightseeing, touring, travel, language learning, photography and also that was when I started really getting serious about my health and fitness. But when we moved back to the States, we were faced with a job search that had us living with my in-laws while he was on the job market. My in laws are very much NOT concerned with their health or weight and I struggled to continue healthy eating patterns and keeping up a certain amount of daily activity while fighting depression as the job search continued.
Things both got better and got worse when my husband secured a new position and we moved across the country. On one hand, we were out of my in-law's home and into an apartment of our own, which was fantastic. Unfortunately, we were in a town where we knew absolutely no one and now I was still at home, but without all of the novel things to do in Japan - and talking to my cat. By the way, my cat is a wonderful listener! Unfortunately, she wasn't really able to say more than "mrow!" when I started stuffing my face with chocolate, ice cream and just about anything else that slid back into previous unhealthy eating patterns.
What I ended up doing, after about six months and regaining more than half of the weight I'd managed to take off, was to join one of my local gyms. I picked one that was both inexpensive and within walking distance and it served multiple purposes for getting me out of the house, getting my steps in, getting a workout in and starting to meet people in the area. As it happens, within a couple of months, one of the gym's staff was leaving and I was asked to interview for a position there, which I did and successfully, so I added a job to my routine.
I will say that I'm still struggling a bit, but the best advice I can give you is to take it one day at a time and look for opportunities to get out into your new community and get to know people. Sites like Meetup might be good for that, just to get you out of the house and interacting with people who share similar interests as you.
Good luck!1 -
im a stay at home wife with friends ans family not here as well. My husband is home a lot but hes an athlete so he leaves a lot too. Hes going to China tomorrow for 2 weeks.. was just gone a week for a contest ect ect. Im alone ALL THE TIME and eating is my comfort. Some days i wont even get 3k steps because i just find myself getting lost in tv the internet blah blah. i really gotta force myself. I joined a pilates reformer place... take my dogs out (not as often as i should) its hard i feel what your going through. Its one of those force urself to get out type thing.
edit- wanted to add i joined a wildlife rescue organization. and volunteer at a shelter but its hard for me because i want all the animals lol. I live in san diego so youd think id be at the beach everyday.. but once tourist season starts id rather be home.1 -
"grettiej wrote:
Man that's exactly what my husband said. Even if it's just a trip to a coffee shop.
To make it worse we moved into a apt complex from hell. We have a family of 6 under us with kids thst scream and slam doors at all hours of the day. That's def contributing to my slump.
I can sooo relate to this! And my wife can even more as she is working at home right now. In order to accept my current job we had to move to San Antonio, Texas, really quick. No time for house shopping. So, we moved from a 3800 square foot house to a 1300 square foot apartment, on the second floor of a three floor building. There is a herd of water buffalo living above us that is hunted by lions every night from about 7 pm until midnight. The woman next to us, well, she is happy to inform the building that every time is the BEST she has EVER HAD OH MY GOD! Apartment life...
Seriously though, get out of the place. Coffee shop, bookstore, go volunteer somewhere, just go for a walk even. Any kind of social club, like a book club or something? Go house shopping for the hell of it, never hurts to look! It helps dramatically with mood, and will help you focus on good things.
Hey, you can go to a bar with your husband tonight, get your favorite drink, and we (and anyone else that wants) can toast to the fantastic apartment living lifestyle!0 -
cmtristani wrote: »"grettiej wrote:
Man that's exactly what my husband said. Even if it's just a trip to a coffee shop.
To make it worse we moved into a apt complex from hell. We have a family of 6 under us with kids thst scream and slam doors at all hours of the day. That's def contributing to my slump.
I can sooo relate to this! And my wife can even more as she is working at home right now. In order to accept my current job we had to move to San Antonio, Texas, really quick. No time for house shopping. So, we moved from a 3800 square foot house to a 1300 square foot apartment, on the second floor of a three floor building. There is a herd of water buffalo living above us that is hunted by lions every night from about 7 pm until midnight. The woman next to us, well, she is happy to inform the building that every time is the BEST she has EVER HAD OH MY GOD! Apartment life...
Seriously though, get out of the place. Coffee shop, bookstore, go volunteer somewhere, just go for a walk even. Any kind of social club, like a book club or something? Go house shopping for the hell of it, never hurts to look! It helps dramatically with mood, and will help you focus on good things.
Hey, you can go to a bar with your husband tonight, get your favorite drink, and we (and anyone else that wants) can toast to the fantastic apartment living lifestyle!
Haha. This made me smile.
I'm glad someone can relate to the apartment situation. We opted for a top floor in hopes for quiet but the family under us shakes our walls their so loud. Then the family across from us has a toddler who tries to escape out of their front door so we hear them screaming I'm a foreign language and slamming doors. It's like a damn circus in our building. Scares my dog as. well
I think the real kicker was when I heard our neighbors going at it at 2am under us. At that point my husband said screw this were breaking our lease. I'm house shopping now. Rent only, but in hopes for some peace0 -
im a stay at home wife with friends ans family not here as well. My husband is home a lot but hes an athlete so he leaves a lot too. Hes going to China tomorrow for 2 weeks.. was just gone a week for a contest ect ect. Im alone ALL THE TIME and eating is my comfort. Some days i wont even get 3k steps because i just find myself getting lost in tv the internet blah blah. i really gotta force myself. I joined a pilates reformer place... take my dogs out (not as often as i should) its hard i feel what your going through. Its one of those force urself to get out type thing.
edit- wanted to add i joined a wildlife rescue organization. and volunteer at a shelter but its hard for me because i want all the animals lol. I live in san diego so youd think id be at the beach everyday.. but once tourist season starts id rather be home.
Oh man I understand.
I wanna nap all day, and my poor dog is getting depressed because I don't walk her much. She is my fur BFF so when I'm down she's done.
I managed to drag myself to the gym for the first time in 2 weeks. It was hard, but I'm trying.0 -
im a stay at home wife with friends ans family not here as well. My husband is home a lot but hes an athlete so he leaves a lot too. Hes going to China tomorrow for 2 weeks.. was just gone a week for a contest ect ect. Im alone ALL THE TIME and eating is my comfort. Some days i wont even get 3k steps because i just find myself getting lost in tv the internet blah blah. i really gotta force myself. I joined a pilates reformer place... take my dogs out (not as often as i should) its hard i feel what your going through. Its one of those force urself to get out type thing.
edit- wanted to add i joined a wildlife rescue organization. and volunteer at a shelter but its hard for me because i want all the animals lol. I live in san diego so youd think id be at the beach everyday.. but once tourist season starts id rather be home.
Oh man I understand.
I wanna nap all day, and my poor dog is getting depressed because I don't walk her much. She is my fur BFF so when I'm down she's done.
I managed to drag myself to the gym for the first time in 2 weeks. It was hard, but I'm trying.[/quote]
I used to volunteer in my old state but I started experiencing horrible allergies so I think those days are gone. I'm so bummed about it. Boo 0 -
im a stay at home wife with friends ans family not here as well. My husband is home a lot but hes an athlete so he leaves a lot too. Hes going to China tomorrow for 2 weeks.. was just gone a week for a contest ect ect. Im alone ALL THE TIME and eating is my comfort. Some days i wont even get 3k steps because i just find myself getting lost in tv the internet blah blah. i really gotta force myself. I joined a pilates reformer place... take my dogs out (not as often as i should) its hard i feel what your going through. Its one of those force urself to get out type thing.
edit- wanted to add i joined a wildlife rescue organization. and volunteer at a shelter but its hard for me because i want all the animals lol. I live in san diego so youd think id be at the beach everyday.. but once tourist season starts id rather be home.
Oh man I understand.
I wanna nap all day, and my poor dog is getting depressed because I don't walk her much. She is my fur BFF so when I'm down she's done.
I managed to drag myself to the gym for the first time in 2 weeks. It was hard, but I'm trying.
its hard to get out of that funk once your there. its quite comfy doing nothing lol. getting a routine will help... the hardest part getting that routine ha. its amazing how fast time can fly in a day sitting around.0
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