Not really new but trying again, again

Hi there!

My name is Megan. I'm turning 32 this year. I'm 5 feet 6 inches and weighed in at 243 this morning. I'm a vegetarian and have multiple chronic illnesses.

I've always been heavy. In high school I weighed 300 pounds. At 22 I had managed to get down to 165, I maintained at 175 for many years but 2 years ago I had crept back up to 259. At 259 I panicked and went on Medifast (pretty big mistake). On medifast I lost 65 pounds in 4 months (also lost a lot of my hair ) After medifast I gained back weight pretty slowly and here I am now having gained back nearly all of it.

I've "restarted" healthy eating multiple times this year. It just seems to be getting harder and harder. I feel like I have a pretty bad food addiction especially sweets.

So here I am, first goal is to lose 50 pounds, again.

I'm just trying to take things one day at a time. I've made up a little plan for myself based on my interpretation of a 90/10 eating rule where for 9 days I stay "on track" with ~1,500 calories a day and on the 10th day I can have a "treat meal" including a reasonably sized dessert then I'd cycle back for another 9 days. This is only my 4th day but I'm feeling very accomplished because for WEEKS before this I was pretty much eating junk food for every "meal".

Good luck to all and cheers to a future of better health!