Binge Eating
xelmax
Posts: 33 Member
I tend to binge eat a lot and its getting worse. I was wondering if anyone can recommend any good books that may help with this? I use the forums for inspiration which can help a little.
Thanks
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Tips....
First, admit there was a problem. For three going on four years, I blamed externals, my drive, and my dreams for my actions. Ignoring people in my life hinting at me that I may have a problem, including family, close friends, and girlfriend. I lied to myself, rationalizing it with the mask of a cheat meal. As the punishment for binging increased so did the amount of times I binged. At first once a week, then every couple days, every other, until it consumed my thoughts. At times I would drive to Walmart just to eat it all before coming home. Chances are if you are reading this it is because you are looking for help. Good for you, you are lightyears ahead of where I was!
Second, I learned to love myself for me, as a matter of fact I am still learning how to do this. Today, the emulated physique is seen as happiness. It is published on social media, magazines, and posters as the symbol of happiness. I believed it, I chased it and chased it. I had it for some time and I was still just as miserable. How you look will not make you happy! Now don’t twist those words as an excuse to just let ourselves become overweight. Chances are you will break step 1 which is lying and rationalizing it. We have to learn to accept our imperfections. We all have them and everyone tries to hide them. Here are my flaws (some I can fix, others are what they are):
Relationships: I am aweful. I wrecked a 15 year friendship with a highschool sweetheart, I was selfish and an *kitten*. I can also be abrasive and brutal with little to no compassion. However ever since I shared this personal story, I have gotten better. Although I am by no means finished working on this.
Skin Damage: I never wore sunscreen as a kid. Now I have moles, freckles, and scars. Some I wish weren’t there. Some girls won’t talk to me because of them. I am not “sexy” enough. They aren’t “interested”.
Don’t let your imperfections stop you from loving yourself. You are the only you this world will ever see, embrace yourself. Perhaps the worst thing about this cycle was I hated myself, I hated my life, I did not want to look in the mirror, I thought I was a failure that I would never make it, I contemplated suicide. When I would binge, I would punish myself. Don’t do that we are human, life is meant to be enjoyed. Life is much too short to never treat yourself to what you love to eat whatever that maybe for you. Look yourself in the mirror directly into your eyes saying “I LOVE myself” at least 10 times a day, if not more. P.S. try not to smile when you say this (harder than you think).
Thirdly, there is no such thing as good food, bad food. Placing labels on food, leads us to ban them from our intake. We say, “No, No, No, No, No…” We push for the perfect diet, once we eat this food that does not fall into this neat diet box; we throw our hands up, saying we failed so now is the time to eat everything we can. This leads to punishment. Which leads to more restrictions. This is the vicious cycle we as binge eaters face. I used to believe it myself, that there was clean food and bad food. It simply is this manifested idea. If you ask a vegan, he/she will say animal based foods are not clean. Someone who is a vegetarian will disagree, and say it is just animal products that are not clean. Then a paleo guy runs in screaming about how meat is clean, but grains aren’t. So someone has to be right? They are all wrong. Instead, adopt my grandmother’s wise old adage of “everything in moderation.” AKA IIFYM
Fourth, going along the lines of moderation. You can eat whatever you want just not all at once. I believe I heard Layne Norton say this, I believe this, like the 11th commandment, in fact it should be an amendment to the constitution. When I first began to escape cycle, I would eat one “treat” at every meal. Nothing crazy, but it will allow you still get your “fix” but you won’t binge on it. Any action in the right direction gave me more motivation and encouragement to keep improving. The small wins kept snowballing into large victories later that slammed the door on binging. Disclaimer, it is wiser to eat this food item from a plate not from the container. Don’t test your will to fight binging if you do not have too. As the old saying goes, “work smarter, not harder.”
Fifth, no more crazy spreadsheets and tracking of nutrients line item by line item like an accountant. I did not worry about counting calories and the works. I would instead eat (3) meals, breakfast, lunch and supper possibly a snack if I was hungry. I would eat slowly, and as I began to feel fuller I would stop eating. You may be like me and scared that you’ll get fat. Well what is our other choice? We can keep binge eating which is not working, because you wouldn’t be reading this. Or we can reach out and try something new. I need to be conscious of my eating, instead of speed eating (still struggle at times).
Sixth, 180, 190, 160, 225, 200…what number was it going to be today I thought I as I closed my eyes scared to look down at the scale after a night of binging (these were all weights I reached during this cycle). You do not need a scale to help you. It’s about small wins, small wins, they add up trust me; I have been there too. Most people overestimate the damage of a binge. You need to eat in excess of 3500 calories over your normal intake to gain a pound of fat. It is not as bad as we create in our minds. Additionally, when we stand on the scale after a binge our body is bloated, full of food, sodium, and other goodies. This only compounds the guilt feeling.
It is your lucky day! I said six, but here is a seventh tip. So, what about eating at restaurants and parties? Parties were my kryptonite, the amount of food that I saw and I thought I had to eat three people’s worth of everything. What helped me to win at parties was I made this a game in my head (who cares no one else knows..plus now you know I did it). I am very competitive; I hate losing even if it’s go fish with a girlfriend (I will be a terrible father I will never let my kids win). Since eating slower and not getting seconds was a struggle at first. The game I created was to be the last one done eating, and the last one to get seconds. This helped me in many ways, first to help me eat slower I talked with people, this helped to repair the relationships I had damaged in the past, plus I was not over eating (win/win). Which is why I was last to get seconds, so often I would eat so quick that my stomach didn’t even know it was fed until I was already 4-5 plates of heaping food deep.
Make that eight, workout for fun! For so long in this process I trained for results no I do not mean goals; I simply worked out to look good that’s it! It was the complete wrong direction, it made training no fun, I dreaded every gym session, and was having a miserable time. It doesn’t matter if you are into bodybuilding, figure, physique, cross fit, powerlifting, strongman, marathons, etc. just train for fun, train to get better and challenge yourself. For me this was powerlifting.
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Haha! Great response by @KinkJarfld!
Mindfulness and awareness are key. Prior to eating something stop and ask yourself if you need it and if it's worth it.
Limit your access to food, if possible. Don't buy the things you tend to over eat. If that's not something you can control, then you need to stop, take a breath, and evaluate how you'll feel after you eat.
There are books people here recommend but I can't remember the titles off hand. Hopefully others will post them!1 -
Currently, I am reading "Beck Diet Solution" that focuses on cognitive behavior therapy to help with the self sabotage. I really liked the book and am going to be doing all the tasks listed in that book. Good luck!2
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I too binge eat and I found that it's all about my mind set. If I have some cookies or ice cream I get the attitude "well now I blew it for the day" and I binge. However that's not the case, you have to make an immediate U turn and don't think you blew if for the day. A small treat is okay and most of the time it won't hurt your progress but binging will. good Luck3
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Thrive by Rob Kelly.
Teaches you about yourself, your triggers, how you view yourself and how to change your outlook on life and yourself. Best self help book I have come across as it changes your opinions of yourself, and how your mindset affects your behaviour.2 -
Look into "Brain over binge," it uses a neurobiological approach to dismissing the urges.2
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oh my god yes, to cheesy567 - brain over binge. It's about a girl who was bulimic, but it is an absolutely fantastic read. Basically she says - drop all the bull and just HEAR the 'animal brain' telling you to eat, and don't ACT or LISTEN. It can only nag and whine but it can NEVER make you act.
I think we as a society get wrapped around the axel of 'binge eating' as a disease...when in this book she instead describes it as a 'binge created brain wiring problem'. It's just a conditioned pattern of brain activity and impulses that we can break the moment we watch it happening without reacting.
Amazing. Couldn't recommend it more.
And also, consider taking a look at Isabel Foxen Duke's website. She is amazing, young, inspirational, and SO right.1 -
gofaster01 wrote: »I too binge eat and I found that it's all about my mind set. If I have some cookies or ice cream I get the attitude "well now I blew it for the day" and I binge. However that's not the case, you have to make an immediate U turn and don't think you blew if for the day. A small treat is okay and most of the time it won't hurt your progress but binging will. good Luck
I agree, from my experience, my eating disorder was mental, due to the story I was telling myself. Like, strive for perfection in our diet, that if its not 100% perfect, we flip a *kitten*. However, its interesting to me that all successful people, LeBron, Bill Gates, Mark Zucks, etc...all say that consistency is the key to success. This same principle applies in fitness.
Like you could have the most perfectly perfect "clean" eating meal plan thingy, but if you only follow it 5 out of the 7 days of a week with "cheats" a.k.a binges the other two days, your spinning your wheels. Dunno just somethings I have observed in my journey, that I see often...1 -
I love pizza. But we have broken up for now, because I know one taste and she will seduce me...0
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Are you already part of this group? If so, sorry for the redundancy. https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/group/100766-eating-disorder-support-group0
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Thanks everyone0
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