Dumped because I'm fat and ugly.

After 3 years he decided he can do better. I need to lose weight, not for him but for me. I can't say I blame him because I hate how I look in the mirror.

I also need to have surgery in 3 months and need to lose enough weight before it would even be possible to do. I struggle to do it alone. Im hoping there might be some people who have a lot to lose too who would like to be accountable to each other.

I have 100 lbs to lose altogether but I need to lose about 28 lbs in 3 months

Replies

  • KetoneKaren
    KetoneKaren Posts: 6,412 Member
    You might be interested in this: http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/comment/37127336#Comment_37127336

    Most of these people have more weight to lose than you do, but I am sure they would be welcoming!

    Good luck, and congratulations on starting your journey.
  • Chris_cairns80
    Chris_cairns80 Posts: 18 Member
    Since he dumped me on tuesday last week I've lost 5lbs but thats because I haven't really been eating much. Now I know I need to start of any weight loss is just going to go straight back on.
  • 143tobe
    143tobe Posts: 620 Member
    Hey you! I started at 218, and am now 157, but although I'm not exactly where you are right now, I have been there. I also do all my weight loss in blocks of 3 months. I have found that breaking up the weight loss into bite size chunks is soo much better than just having this huge mountain of a number to overcome. You can totally do this, and screw him. You are gorgeous and your next guy is going to be so much hotter than he ever was. Add me if you would like some support. I would be more than happy to share the methods I've used to drop my weight, especially in the beginning when I had so much fat clogging me up internally I could hardly breath. So glad you joined MFP! It's been an amazingly helpful tool in my weight loss journey, utilize it, the people in it, and it will surely help you meet your goal. I'm so sorry for your recent heartache. You're going to get through this, stronger than you were before. <3
  • chrislo2691
    chrislo2691 Posts: 1,084 Member
    The best reason to lose weight is for you. I will say this, I have had a couple of partners who were larger. That did not bother me and it has never been a reason not to be with someone. I have always accepted them as the were, though they were unhappy with the way they looked, had they wanted to lose weight I would have done the best I could to help them.
    You have a great opportunity with an important target to get started, grab it with both hands and go for it.
    So you need to lose about 2lb a week. tell us what you struggle with.
  • Chris_cairns80
    Chris_cairns80 Posts: 18 Member
    I have 3 young kids and sometimes when I'm making their dinner ill pick without even noticing. I don't really look after myself very well because I'm too busy making sure my kids are happy. Im now very limited to the exercise I can do and I really don't have the confidence to go into the swimming pool. The exercise I love is horse riding and cycling. Im planning on starting running again too
  • zoeysasha37
    zoeysasha37 Posts: 7,088 Member
    I'm sorry this happened to you.
    Please don't be so hard on yourself. Yeah you may be over weight but you can change that! Your not ugly and will find someone else. Your in the right place! Chin up- because you can do better!
  • tech_kitten
    tech_kitten Posts: 221 Member
    He is obviously not worth your time. You are beautiful.
  • jcardosi75
    jcardosi75 Posts: 7 Member
    Add me as a friend
  • BarbellzNBrotein
    BarbellzNBrotein Posts: 306 Member
    *kitten* him. If he can't accept you as is then trust me, his not worth your time. It's better to end things now before a child is involved. You look great.
  • BreannaB823
    BreannaB823 Posts: 114 Member
    Add me!
  • RachelElser
    RachelElser Posts: 427 Member
    what a jerk! Lose the weight for yourself and your health, 100% not for shallow jerk faces!
  • brenn24179
    brenn24179 Posts: 2,144 Member
    that was probably best 200 lbs(or whatever he weighs) you will ever lose. take care of yourself, lose the weight,get a nice guy, show him. We will help you
  • anaees
    anaees Posts: 8 Member
    He is obviously a waste of space. You are beautiful and you are on to better things! Good luck on your journey.
  • clau9734
    clau9734 Posts: 43 Member
    I know how you feel I'm sorry u went through that.
  • lisahebert186
    lisahebert186 Posts: 736 Member
    I'm so sorry to hear that. You are obviously so much better off without him. I have quite the journey myself. Please add me and we can work at it together.
  • Amrik10
    Amrik10 Posts: 93 Member
    YOU will move onto better things. He is a loser.Obviously a coward making excuses. All you need to do is focus on your health and then you will feel happy and beautiful inside and out. So let's get this done for a better you!!!
  • klkarlen
    klkarlen Posts: 4,366 Member
    ^ What everyone above me said. Be a good role model for your kids, take care of yourself while you care for them, and I guarantee you that in a short time you will be so proud of yourself for starting this journey as the pounds come off, and you can be more active with your kids.

    Your ex is a coward for using weight as an excuse. Good riddance to him I say.
  • louvig
    louvig Posts: 15 Member
    Be strong and forget him. He is obviously not a good person. You can do this!! Get your TDEE and monitor your calories on MFP to make sure you are in a deficit. Do this consistently and you will lose weight.
  • Elise4270
    Elise4270 Posts: 8,375 Member
    You got this!

    And you can do better than him :wink:
  • Chris_cairns80
    Chris_cairns80 Posts: 18 Member
    Thank you all for the lovely comments. I think I need to work on my own self esteem
  • roddernation
    roddernation Posts: 48 Member
    Add me to your friends list for shared encouragement and support
  • christinebushee2014
    christinebushee2014 Posts: 3 Member
    Someone like that is ugly on the inside and that is something he can never change!!
  • gcibsthom
    gcibsthom Posts: 30,145 Member
    I heard a great saying that "fat I can lose...stupid can't be fixed...." There will come a time when he will want you back...You can do this..MFP is full of success stories and you can be one... The 28 lbs in 3 months will be tough but possible, and for that you might talk to your doctor. As for the rest..MFP is a great tool to help you get there. And most will tell you, get "diet" out of your mind. That is only temporary. You will be changing your lifestyle...permanent...It will mean eating healthy, only eating what you need, and exercising...limiting calorie intake and increasing calorie burn....You can do it, girl
  • ktekc
    ktekc Posts: 879 Member
    edited July 2016
    Yeah tell him " I can lose weight but you will always be a dick."

    ETA. . wow it didn't get the *kitten* treatment.
  • LosinginJersey
    LosinginJersey Posts: 21 Member
    Don't ever say that about yourself...he is just a stupid jerk off who didn't deserve you in the first place...I hope one day he tries to come crawling back and you just dismiss him