Too fat for an Asian girl

kanaada
kanaada Posts: 57 Member
edited July 2016 in Health and Weight Loss
Hi everyone as u all know Asian girls are mostly petite and tiny so as a girl living in Asia that is overweight my whole life I have very Low self esteem. My weight is the main topic in most family gatherings and people will call me fat all the time even my own Mother. Now I lost some weight and I am still considered chubby by Asia girls standard. What do u guys think? Should I embrace my size and ignore those *kitten* up body Image requirements? Tired of trying to be the slim girl that everyone is in asia☹️

Replies

  • Christine_72
    Christine_72 Posts: 16,049 Member
    edited July 2016
    Embrace your size because you are definitely NOT fat, not even close! It's the pressure to be stick thin that's prevalent in your culture that needs to change, not you!!
    Your family and especially your mother need to be put in their place, even though i know it's the norm to be brutally honest about weight over there, it doesn't make it right and obviously does more damage to the person on the receiving end than good.

    ETA: I could understand their concern if you were overweight or obese, but you're not, so pppffffttt and meh to them :tongue:
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    You look great!
  • Jeebles604
    Jeebles604 Posts: 16 Member
    You have a wonderful figure, and that's coming from an Asian girl :)
  • bujiebuke
    bujiebuke Posts: 6 Member
    I grew up in a Chinese family and have developed anxiety due to fat shaming. Mind you I was and still am actually obese by any metrics. Several years ago I decided to break away from all that BS and decided to live a life without the constant criticism and harassment. Not recommending that you have to do the same, but just be mindful that life is short and your family are the ones who have the problems.

  • kanaada
    kanaada Posts: 57 Member
    phrunch wrote: »
    Your body is PERFECT. I have a good number of female Korean friends and every single one of them hears that they're fat from their mother. No matter what they look like.

    You are slim now. In fact, if you posted saying you're looking to lose weight, I think a lot of people would get confused. If your family won't cut you slack and love your body, then you're going to have to do it for yourself.
    phrunch wrote: »
    Your body is PERFECT. I have a good number of female Korean friends and every single one of them hears that they're fat from their mother. No matter what they look like.

    You are slim now. In fact, if you posted saying you're looking to lose weight, I think a lot of people would get confused. If your family won't cut you slack and love your body, then you're going to have to do it for yourself.
    phrunch wrote: »
    Your body is PERFECT. I have a good number of female Korean friends and every single one of them hears that they're fat from their mother. No matter what they look like.

    You are slim now. In fact, if you posted saying you're looking to lose weight, I think a lot of people would get confused. If your family won't cut you slack and love your body, then you're going to have to do it for yourself.

  • williammuney
    williammuney Posts: 2,895 Member
    I don't know where you live but I'd bet you'd have to fight the guys off of you in the US!
  • JeromeBarry1
    JeromeBarry1 Posts: 10,179 Member
    The comments you get with that picture on myfitnesspal are, well, as you see. From women. Put that picture on glocktalk and that crowd would flood you with variations of "I'd hit it!".
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    JeromeBarry1 wrote: »
    The comments you get with that picture on myfitnesspal are, well, as you see. From women. Put that picture on glocktalk and that crowd would flood you with variations of "I'd hit it!".

    Give it time and that'll be the same on here...
  • arditarose
    arditarose Posts: 15,573 Member
    You look good. Do YOU want to lose more weight? I think it might be more important to have a talk with the people you love and tell them to shut the *kitten* up.
  • wildtxn
    wildtxn Posts: 97 Member
    I think you look fabulous.
  • azulvioleta6
    azulvioleta6 Posts: 4,195 Member
    Buy some prettier underwear and call it good. Your body is fine.
  • cerise_noir
    cerise_noir Posts: 5,468 Member
    edited July 2016
    You're freakin' gorgeous!

    Love yourself and stop comparing yourself to others. You are you... Special, unique, and they are....them. Different, not you. Embrace yourself! You're going to rock this!

    Instead of weight loss, I highly recommend doing a body recomp, which is eating at maintenance and doing a progressive heavy lifting program such as Strong lifts 5x5 or Strong Curves... This will not cause you to 'hulk out', it does the opposite and creates a nice lean and strong body. It is very difficult for women to get bulky and a revamp won't make you look bulky at all.
  • markrgeary1
    markrgeary1 Posts: 853 Member
    You look great.

    Don't worry about what family says, some are unknowingly very cruel. Learn from your families mistakes so you won't be critical of your kids.
  • PeachyPlum
    PeachyPlum Posts: 1,243 Member
    You look gorgeous.

    I'm not Asian, but I've lived in S. Korea and I have a number of friends from various Asian countries and there seems to be a HUGE amount of family pressure, no matter what you've achieved. You can never be thin enough, your grades can never be good enough, your career can never be successful enough.

    Many of my friends have made themselves sick and weak under that kind of pressure.

    Here are some links that might help you figure out how best to handle your family's expectations

    https://captainawkward.com/2016/02/06/824-my-mom-is-obsessed-with-my-looks-and-my-weight/

    https://captainawkward.com/2012/09/04/345-my-mom-wont-shut-up-about-my-weight/
  • heartofplastic
    heartofplastic Posts: 68 Member
    I'm 5'1" and 105 lbs and I am considered fat by Korean standards too. But I lose weight because I want to and I know I have some excess fat that I don't need. Also, I don't really believe in American standards either because there is a lot of fat acceptance going on here. So I base my decision off of what I think, not what others think.
  • PAV8888
    PAV8888 Posts: 14,259 Member
    edited July 2016
    heartofplastic wrote: »
    I'm 5'1" and 105 lbs and I am considered fat by Korean standards too. But I lose weight because I want to and I know I have some excess fat that I don't need. Also, I don't really believe in American standards either because there is a lot of fat acceptance going on here. So I base my decision off of what I think, not what others think.
    @heartofplastic, you may want to review your decisions based on health criteria as opposed to a subjective opinion about your looks, even if the author of the subjective opinion is yourself :smile:
    http://www.smartbmicalculator.com/result.html?unit=1&hf=5&hi=1&wl=105&us=1&ua=26&gl=100&dt=6
  • cerise_noir
    cerise_noir Posts: 5,468 Member
    heartofplastic wrote: »
    I'm 5'1" and 105 lbs and I am considered fat by Korean standards too. But I lose weight because I want to and I know I have some excess fat that I don't need. Also, I don't really believe in American standards either because there is a lot of fat acceptance going on here. So I base my decision off of what I think, not what others think.

    No, there isn't.....
    Start eating at maintenance and lift heavy.
  • Maxematics
    Maxematics Posts: 2,287 Member
    cerise_noir wrote: »
    heartofplastic wrote: »
    I'm 5'1" and 105 lbs and I am considered fat by Korean standards too. But I lose weight because I want to and I know I have some excess fat that I don't need. Also, I don't really believe in American standards either because there is a lot of fat acceptance going on here. So I base my decision off of what I think, not what others think.

    No, there isn't.....
    Start eating at maintenance and lift heavy.

    I don't want to knock other people for their choices, as it is their bodies to do what they please, but you really think there isn't fat acceptance going on in America? Really?
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,329 Member
    I think in general you should speak up for yourself and check people who have hurtful comments. If people truly love you then they won't do or say things that you've told them are unhelpful hurtful. And if they do continue, then you go ahead and unleash that krakken of a verbal *kitten* whooping they have coming :-)

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