My cousin has died.

Pangea250
Pangea250 Posts: 965 Member
edited September 29 in Motivation and Support
On Saturday, I found out that my 16 year old son's father (who hasn't been a part of his life) died. It was hard telling my son, and it's hard guiding him through how he feels. His is not a "traditional" grieving.

Last night, my mother called to tell me that my cousin, just 49 years old, was found dead in bed in the morning. I'm still in shock. She has a son that is the same age as mine. We were pregnant together. I have a large extended family and I'm 1 of 29 cousins. We're all close. Evelyn is the first cousin to die.

We have just found out that Ev was being treated for congestive heart failure, but hid this from everybody. She was probably 300 lbs. and smoked like a chimney. An autopsy was done today, so hopefully it will bring some answers. My brain completely understands why this happened to someone so young. But my heart is having trouble with it.

Thank God I was able to answer my son and my 9 year old daughter when they questioned me about my health. Thank God they've seen me making the changes and eating right and exercising. Thank God my 2 kids feel a little more safe in their world today because of what I've been doing.

I'm going to really miss Evelyn.

Replies

  • irishgal44
    irishgal44 Posts: 1,141 Member
    I'm so sorry to hear. i'm also part of a family where 1st cousins are close and I lost my first cousin 2 years ago. He was 27 and died of a pulmonary embolism. It has so terribly hard on all of us and we all still morn his death like it was yesterday. And I'm sorry to hear of your son's father too - praying he grieves the way he needs to. My husband never knew his dad and was 22 when his dad died - lots of anger was involved with the grieving process and unanswered questions he suddenly wanted answered. ((HUGS)) to you all!
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member
    Sorry about your loss. :flowerforyou:
  • ladyerin79
    ladyerin79 Posts: 97 Member
    So sorry to hear about Evelyn. *hugs to you*
  • Lollyvoddy
    Lollyvoddy Posts: 194 Member
    So sorry for your loss.

    And my heart goes out to your son. I found out my own birth mother, who I knew but had not had a relationship with for a while, died recently. I was surprised at how great the sense of loss was.

    Good on you for making changes.
  • Jameade
    Jameade Posts: 14 Member
    My Condolences to you and your family
  • dls06
    dls06 Posts: 6,774 Member
    The best thing you can and are doing, is to get healthy. I lost my brother when I was 11 and I was so affraid everyone around me was going to leave me. Just be there to answer their questions and talk to them. I didn't have anyone to talk to and it was horrible. I still remember everyone around me was so busy comforting my parents they didn't think of me. Now people are aware children need help to get through too. Sorry for your loss.
  • suzooz
    suzooz Posts: 720 Member
    So sorry to hear about your losses. May God be with you and your family in your time of need.
  • jeffrodgers1
    jeffrodgers1 Posts: 991 Member
    So sorry for your loss. My prayers are with you.
  • PinUpMommy
    PinUpMommy Posts: 94
    *hugs* I am SO very sorry. My father passed away from complications due to congestive heart failure, diabetes, and obesity. It's so hard when you lose someone whos life could have been saved had they treated their bodies differently.
  • sparrows7
    sparrows7 Posts: 59
    Sorry about your loss.
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