How to be more selfish!!

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I don't work out because when ever I do my daughter gets extremely upset when I leave to the gym yesterday she told me I don't care about her . I try so hard to not feel guilty by going to the gym but when my 3 year old gets upset it really makes me feel like I should just be home with her instead . Today I work all day then was going to go home for dinner then go to the gym tonight but I feel so guilty because I will barely get an hour to spend with her today !...help !

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  • tulips_and_tea
    tulips_and_tea Posts: 5,710 Member
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    Does your gym have childcare? If so, can she go with you? Or, can you do something active that somewhat includes her? If you lift maybe you can get some weights for your home and do those and body weight exercises. She can do those with you: sit ups, push ups, etc. Can you go for a walk or a bike ride?

    When my son was little I walked the high school track near my house. First I walked with him in the stroller. As he got older he'd play in the dirt / sand in the long-jump pit while I walked. Sure, there were interruptions but they are only kids for so long.
  • emdeesea
    emdeesea Posts: 1,823 Member
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    Is there no one else at home to watch her?
  • Cahgetsfit
    Cahgetsfit Posts: 1,912 Member
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    YOu can do gym stuff at home with her. I use my 5y.o. sometimes as a barbell and other things - eg - lie on the ground, get her to plank and bench press her. I also sit on a hard chair, get her to sit on my feet and do leg raises (she becomes the weight! and it's fun "horsey" and also she does all the rep counting. I do plank and she sits on my back and counts, I do clean and jerk type thing where I hold her torso squat down and lift her up above my head....

    also - if you can leave her once or twice a week with a sitter or something it's not the end of the world. Kids know how to make us feel guilty if you keep giving in to all whims... well - good luck!

    i can tell when mine is faking it or not and when she is I just ignore it and walk off. She rarely even bothers to try anymore.
  • fposte2016
    fposte2016 Posts: 130 Member
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    I feel guilty too -- my toddler has come to prefer dad in part because I've started to leave to work out most mornings. But it's a phase and they do adjust to new routines. I keep trying to tell myself that my being healthy and setting a good example of an active adult is good parenting. They are such experts at pushing emotional buttons though.
  • NMSever
    NMSever Posts: 20 Member
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    At some point you'll need to take care of you. Finding the balance is different for everyone. I find I'm a better mom when I get my hour at the gym to do my workout and my kids no longer care and tell me to have fun. Maybe try going before work or after she's in bed if it's truly an issue. Good luck!
  • smile_laughter
    smile_laughter Posts: 3,680 Member
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    I highly recommend purchasing some barbells and fitness videos (Cathe Friedrich is awesome). My kids sometimes work out with me, and they know how much I enjoy it. I like to take them to the park, too. There I can walk while they play, do squats, lunges, etc.

  • lapierrecyclist
    lapierrecyclist Posts: 153 Member
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    Three is an age when they really need you, especially if they haven't seen you all day. It isn't manipulation. Definitely try doing some workouts at home, with her, and then maybe you could get to the gym on the weekend.