The Queen of the Yo-Yo

I could really use some encouraging words... I'll give you guys the short version of my pity party:
I am 27 years old, 5'3" and 280 lbs. In 2011, I was 140 lbs... so the weight gain has been rapid (in my opinion). No change in my diet or level of exercise happened... I just started packing on the pounds inexplicably. Yes, I have been tested for every hormonal/medical issue known to man, and nothing is wrong. Well, now I am prediabetic and I HAVE to lose weight for my own well-being.

Growing up, I had a parent that would always make under-the-breath comments about my weight, even though I was a perfectly normal size and healthy. As a teenager, I was 130 lbs and stunning. I look back at those pics and feel sick to my stomach that I hated my body so much. I hated it so much, that when I turned 19 I spent tens of thousands on full body liposuction. I weighed 140 lbs at the time. For whatever reason, within a year I had a gained 40 lbs. I've gained about 30 lbs a year every year since then without fail. Oddly enough, I accept my body a lot more now than I did back then. I don't beat myself up over my appearance like I used to, and even though I am a lot bigger, I don't use negative adjectives to describe myself.

That being said, I need to make BIG changes for my health, and would also love to wear clothes I actually like. My entire life (since I was about 15 years old) I've been the queen of yo-yo diets. I would lose 10 or 15 lbs, fall of the wagon, and gain double.

About two years, my mom was diagnosed diabetic. She made a MASSIVE lifestyle change and now her blood sugar is NORMAL and she does not require any insulin or medication. She's also gone from a 24 to a 14. I am mimicking her diet, and it seems to make me feel a lot better and it will go well for a few weeks... but then I make one slip up that spirals into a week of mistakes. It's no longer a matter of just "getting back on the horse". These types of mistakes simply aren't okay anymore. How do I STAY on track? What will it take for me to find the motivation and willpower inside me to take the leap and make this lifestyle change? It's not as though I don't like the food... it just takes one moment of weakness and it all comes crashing down. And, yes, I've tried weaning slowly off things and I've tried allowed just small portions as treats. It never ends well. I feel like I am at a loss. For the record, my issue is with carbs. I seem to be able to manage my portion issues, but I am very, very carb sensitive and my glucose stays high for 12 hours after a single slice of bread. The carbs HAVE to go!

Has anyone overcome their battle with the yo-yo? What motivated you? What helped you beat the cravings and stay on task?

Replies

  • mousecat88
    mousecat88 Posts: 18 Member
    Edit: I am now prediabetic AND have sleep apnea (which I JUST got a machine for last night). I also have Lyme Disease and rheumatoid arthritis, which limits my exercise. Right now I am focusing on diet changes. I simply cannot take on too much at once or I get even more discouraged by the lack of instant results.
  • navdeeprana
    navdeeprana Posts: 473 Member
    Keep doing the right things and you will be there one day. Appreciate your determination.

    Stay strong
  • Lzm89
    Lzm89 Posts: 127 Member
    Take it day by day .. If one day u fail just start over the next day. Don't feel discourage , plan your meals.. That has helped me soo much it also helps reduce A lot of cravings. Good luck
  • HippySkoppy
    HippySkoppy Posts: 725 Member
    I really would advise you to seek some expert help with your issues.

    Your story is one of a life-long battle with body issues....I mean being 19 and having liposuction on the magnitude that you are talking about and at the weight you were was not reasonable and by the way the Dr. should be disbarred but that's all water under the bridge.

    You sound like you are struggling with much deeper issues than "falling off the wagon"...you are so young to have all these medical issues and your weight is going to negatively contribute to that. Now is the time to take control. I don't know much about blood sugars etc but those numbers sound scary and are no doubt doing you some damage even though you can't necessarily see it.

    I wish you the best and I believe you can take charge of your situation. You are obviously a very strong person to be coping with the pain and disability that you are in, so harness that courage and take the time to look deeper at why you aren't looking after yourself in this way.

    Maybe you are just feeling beaten and tired and you realize that no one else can do the diet change and weight loss for you....it is all up to you and that responsibility has you scared...whatever is holding you back needs to be sorted so you can go on to live a full, healthy and happy life.

  • TrinkySwanson
    TrinkySwanson Posts: 4 Member
    I have RA. It took me a long time to figure out that my eating habits or anything I did or didn't do caused my flares. That it was actually the reverse - my flares - pain cause me to seek out carbs and fats and everything else unhealthy.
    Sometimes they are downright 'downward spirals' that take every ounce of everything to try to stop that spiral.

    A quick trick at least for starters, they have these no salt green beans cans that I pop open at gobble up the whole can. Makes me feel full and like I've eaten carbs.

    Hope to hear from you