Tired of being called [too] skinny...

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FatnFitt
FatnFitt Posts: 5 Member
Is this my fate? I'm 29/yo, 5'8 and currently 120lbs (down 5lbs after a bad strep throat). What really hurts the most is the skinny insults, I can't bare it anymore. I know, I know...eat more, and eventually go to the gym...but the way my life is setup, it's easier said than done. I share a fridge so anything I cook and save is bound to be eaten by someone in my home, creating more stress and struggle to eat more (the only solution is buying my own personal fridge which will take some time, how much time? I don't know.), resulting in me spending exorbitant amounts of money on fast food/restaurants thus creating more debt & interest payments against money I don't have. There's but so much time in the day with work + having to travel via public transportation (which is very time consuming in itself), to cook/eat & shower etc., to even attempt going to a gym at this point, let alone with my current weight, should I even be working out, yet? I'm considering getting a WII + Wii Fit for exercising convenience combined with using personal weights at home but I'm sure that's no substitute for the gym....I'm just having a difficult time grasping clear steps on how to actually start gaining weight, with all of my current obstacles...I know the first step is to stop making excuses and start eating and exercising discipline in areas of my life....I only have a mustard seed of will at this point but hopefully that evolves with some evidence of gains in my life...My Goal: is to reach 150lbs.

TL;DR: I just want to gain weight, and be another success story.

Replies

  • AnabolicMind2011
    AnabolicMind2011 Posts: 211 Member
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    Hello and welcome.
    I know it seems impossible and extremely stressful right now. Just take a deep breath and remember this- weight gain comes from a calorie surplus. You need to consume more calories then you burn. Since cooking isn't always an option for you, try thighs like protein shakes. Add a few scoops of a higher calorie powder, full fat milk, a banana, several spoonfuls of peanut butter and your already at @700 calories :)
    Just think of foods you like that are higher calorie and fast to prepare and incorporate them into your day. Like I said, to gain weight you must consistently consume more then you burn.
    Things like peanut butter, nuts, oils, avocado can help you add on extra calories quickly.
    Honestly, I wouldn't even worry about the Wii fit games right now. If you want to do some cardio for overall good measure then that's fine but I certainly wouldn't go overboard with it.
    Instead I would concentrate on weight lifting. You mentioned you can't get to a gym right now, so maybe see what you can do at home instead. Google convict conditioning. Get yourself some dumb bells to use at home for now. Look online for moving sales or garage sales, sometimes you can find things like a bench , plates, bar for a very good price. I would concentrate on strength training and not worry too much about cardio ( if you want to do some then that's fine but just remember that you need to be at a calorie surplus to gain weight so be mindful of your calories burnt during workouts. You'll likely have to eat those calories back to remain at a surplus)
    Google a list of high calorie foods. Print it out and cross off anything that you dislike. Circle the rest and take it to the store with you, stock up on quick high calorie foods to keep around. Some protein bars can have a decent amount of calories and they're a quick snack on the go ! Peanut butter sandwiches, almonds, and so on can be a fast way to add on calories with minimal prep time. Best of luck to you!
  • AnabolicMind2011
    AnabolicMind2011 Posts: 211 Member
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    For some motivation, Google stories about professional body builders that started out at your size and now have a muscular build! You'll find that many struggled with the same issues( being too thin) and now have created an awesome physique.
  • FatnFitt
    FatnFitt Posts: 5 Member
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    Hello and welcome.
    I know it seems impossible and extremely stressful right now. Just take a deep breath and remember this- weight gain comes from a calorie surplus. You need to consume more calories then you burn. Since cooking isn't always an option for you, try thighs like protein shakes. Add a few scoops of a higher calorie powder, full fat milk, a banana, several spoonfuls of peanut butter and your already at @700 calories :)
    Just think of foods you like that are higher calorie and fast to prepare and incorporate them into your day. Like I said, to gain weight you must consistently consume more then you burn.
    Things like peanut butter, nuts, oils, avocado can help you add on extra calories quickly.
    Honestly, I wouldn't even worry about the Wii fit games right now. If you want to do some cardio for overall good measure then that's fine but I certainly wouldn't go overboard with it.
    Instead I would concentrate on weight lifting. You mentioned you can't get to a gym right now, so maybe see what you can do at home instead. Google convict conditioning. Get yourself some dumb bells to use at home for now. Look online for moving sales or garage sales, sometimes you can find things like a bench , plates, bar for a very good price. I would concentrate on strength training and not worry too much about cardio ( if you want to do some then that's fine but just remember that you need to be at a calorie surplus to gain weight so be mindful of your calories burnt during workouts. You'll likely have to eat those calories back to remain at a surplus)
    Google a list of high calorie foods. Print it out and cross off anything that you dislike. Circle the rest and take it to the store with you, stock up on quick high calorie foods to keep around. Some protein bars can have a decent amount of calories and they're a quick snack on the go ! Peanut butter sandwiches, almonds, and so on can be a fast way to add on calories with minimal prep time. Best of luck to you!
    For some motivation, Google stories about professional body builders that started out at your size and now have a muscular build! You'll find that many struggled with the same issues( being too thin) and now have created an awesome physique.

    Thanks a million, for your informative posts and helpful ideas. I'll certainly pay heed to the suggestions you've mentioned, to start. Hopefully things do pan out in due time. Thanks, again.
  • seanfallon89
    seanfallon89 Posts: 1 Member
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    I was 133 pounds about 7 months ago(im 6 foot btw). I was also called skinny alot. I joined a gym and started bulking and now i am 154 pounds and about 15% body fat. My advice is to just do it you will see results quickly and get addicted to the process.
  • VividDawn
    VividDawn Posts: 111 Member
    edited August 2016
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    Here are my suggestions
    First, talk to the people you share the fridge with, and tell them it's important that food YOU have bought/prepared is to stay yours. Dollar Tree has 3 packs of plastic containers...buy a few sets of these, and write your name on them with permanent marker (it will fade after a few washings, gotta re-do it ever so often). Or make one side of a shelf dedicated to your stuff only. Whatever will keep them from "accidently" eating your stuff.
    If they are apathetic to this, and won't agree to this plan, you will have to resort to having non perishable items. Bananas, peanut butter, crackers, granola, trail mix, dried/dehydrated fruit, bread, muffins, fruit/grain breakfast bars, etc. kept in a box in your room. These things are also great for travel eating, while on public transportation and at work or school. I personally love home made trail mix... nuts, sunflower seeds, raisins and chocolate chips in baggies (I measure out an amount that equals 200 calories each baggie). It's a little expensive, but you can also buy fruit juice and sodas in 6-packs, that way you don't have to keep them in the fridge. Minute Maid Mixed Berry 100% juice is 150 calories, natural sugar, and goes well with trail mix or fruit/grain breakfast bars.
  • ikraz55
    ikraz55 Posts: 3 Member
    edited August 2016
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    Body shaming is a horrible source of motivation. If you want to gain weight or change your body, do it because YOU want to do it, or because your doctor says it's causing you health problems. Doing it just because you aren't living up to what random people are thinking is a 100% recipe for failure. If people are shaming the way you look, that's on them, not you.

    Your BMI is 182, which is just at the border between underweight and healthy weight. In other words, your weight is not an immediate cause for concern unless you continue to lose it.

    Also, it sounds like you have more urgent and important problems to deal with in your life than your weight. You need to start getting your financial and emotional life under control and find ways to reduce stress, because that was really coming through in your post.
  • JayWalk39
    JayWalk39 Posts: 68 Member
    edited August 2016
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    Not to be mean, but it just sounds like you are making excuses. If you want to gain weight you will need to eat more. It really is just that simple. There are PLENTY of ways to do this even with your current living situation. You don't have to eat elaborate meals that need to cooked and refrigerated start basic and eat lots of peanut butter and drink lots of whole milk (a gallon a day...not just a glass). Just those 2 things will yield tremendous results.

    Do not waste your money on Wii. If you have money for that then you have money for the gym. Planet Fitness is $10 a month...I am sure anybody can find a way to reduce their current spending by $10 a month to put towards a gym membership. Also as for time, you make time. Wake up an hour earlier than you normally do if you want to go to the gym. I wake up at 4:30am every day just so I can go to the gym. I have a 3 year old and a 1 year old, commute over 2 hours a day, work full time and still find the time. You just have to want it, which you currently don't right now.

    Still not convinced or still think you can't make it to a gym? 30 minutes at home doing body weight exercises will help (assuming you still focus on the eating first). Air squats, lunges, push-ups, pull-ups. All of these will help build a solid foundation.

    Change your mindset and the rest will fall into place. Anything is possible if you want to work for it.
  • pbryd
    pbryd Posts: 364 Member
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    Sounds as if you have given up before you start.

    The minimum you can do is start to increase your calories easily by drink milk and buying some dumbbells to begin training at home if you don't want to join a gym.

    Some pull ups, goblet squats and overhead presses, with extra calories from milk will start changing your physique.
  • HamsterManV2
    HamsterManV2 Posts: 449 Member
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    First, read the below I wrote for another poster.
    I am 5'7", 165lbs (I look like C6-C7), currently cutting. I suggest you bulk up to my weight then cut back down to 150 to 155lbs to reveal muscle in all its glory (goal of B6 for me personally).
    • Google to get a TDEE estimate. TDEE = total daily energy expenditure, AKA how many calories you burn every day.
    • Slow bulk = TDEE+250 calories a day = +0.5lbs per week = +2lbs per month. Slower gains but less fat gained. Good for intermediates/advanced who are looking at a slower progression, or average guys looking to bulk before their first cut.
    • Regular bulk = TDEE+500 calories a day = +1lbs per week = +4lbs per month. Good for skinny novices, can make great size and strength gains but once you get to 15% bodyfat, go on a slow bulk (unless you are in a strength sport like football) or start cutting. Don't go higher than this, or else you gain too much fat (your body can only put on so much muscle... rest turns into fat).
    • Of course I highly recommend you are lifting during this time, so that you gain mostly muscle with minimal fat. Programs like SL, SS, ICF 5x5 are all great for novices putting on mass and strength.
    You have to count calories for this to work. Get a digital scale, a myfitnesspal account, and be consistent. Consistency >>> intensity. It's a marathon not a sprint.

    For you, regular bulk. You need to gain a large amount of weight, like yesterday. High calorie foods are what you need.

    When I bulked, calorie dense foods was key. Things like olive oil (120calories per tablespoon!), peanut butter sandwiches, and chugging whole fat milk was very helpful. Sometimes before bed, I see I am under my calorie requirement and I have shots of olive oil until I reach it. Suck up the taste and do it.

    You can also keep high calorie spreadables in your room so no one takes it - These bad boys can pack a huge amount of calories in a small meal. I also blended smoothies - whole fat milk, olive oil, banana, chocolate protein powder, and peanut butter / almond butter for a nice 700 calorie smoothie I can sip throughout the day, or have with a meal.

    Listen: You need to force yourself to eat like it is a full time job. It takes 3 weeks to build a habit, and those first 3 weeks will be painful. After that, it becomes weird NOT to eat that much.

    As for workout, get your diet in check first - What you eat determines whether you gain or lose weight. I would start going to the gym one month after you fix your diet (build 1 habit at a time, you only have a finite amount of willpower... trust me on this). Once you are eating TDEE + 500 calories DAILY, then you can start doing some strength programs like the ones I listed above.

    Nuts are also calorie dense - snack on those between meals. Find calorie dense foods, especially liquid if you have a bad appetite. Gain +1lb a week (or more until you get to normal weight).

    TL;DR Eat TDEE+500 calories every day like it's your job. Slow and steady changes = permanent ones.
  • csuhar
    csuhar Posts: 779 Member
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    someguyy wrote: »
    There's but so much time in the day with work + having to travel via public transportation (which is very time consuming in itself), to cook/eat & shower etc., to even attempt going to a gym at this point, let alone with my current weight, should I even be working out, yet? I'm considering getting a WII + Wii Fit for exercising convenience combined with using personal weights at home but I'm sure that's no substitute for the gym.....

    First, yes, unless you have a physical injury you're recovering from, it's NEVER to early to start exercising. In my experience, putting it off until you feel "the time is right" creates too much temptation to keep putting it off.


    Second, you might be surprised how much you can actually do without a formal gym. The approach is different, but at-home workouts can be very effective, especially if you are new to exercise. The one I keep on-hand is the "You are Your Own Gym" app / book. It includes instructions, structured workouts, and progression all while using things like towels, doors, chairs, and countertops that you're likely to be able to find almost anywhere you don't even need formal weights.

    I also liked that many of the workouts were structured so that you'd have, let's say, three minutes per set and you had to do 12 repetitions and then rest for the remainder of the three minutes. I was regularly able to incorporate my chores into this timeframe and do things like wash another couple dishes, pack my bag for the day, or put dirty laundry in the washing machine during the rest periods.
  • BobbyBooSh4y
    BobbyBooSh4y Posts: 15 Member
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    I can relate...sad to hear but no worries we are all gonna make it brah. I've tried it all, and learned a lot over the years. My opinion would be to aim 2-3lbs of weight gain each month. The last thing you want to do is put on weight too fast and a majority of it will be fat. This causes a huge headache when your bulk is done and need to lose the weight..

    Check Hamsters response, for calorie setup. He did a good job regarding the amounts to eat and what they yield. With that being said I would aim 250-350 calories above your TDEE each day and check your weight every week. See how your weight adjusts to the added calories as you don't want to put on weight too quick. Adjust accordingly, if you see no weight gain add 150 calories to your daily target and weight in the following week.

    Having a fast metabolism makes it hard to gain weight, My maintenance before was around 6500 calories because I was so active. So don't spend all day in the gym, get in and get out.

    Food wise, log your food in MFP... Try having 2 of your meals for the day be shakes. You can make some really good quality homemade weight gainers yourself and have them be really cheap.. try keeping things simple, this will help keep stress down. The shakes will be easy to get down, and easy on the stomach. I'd aim 3 whole food meals a day paired with 2 shakes.

    If you need more help, friend me, message me and I don't mind helping you along the way.

    Glad you are doing something about it :)








  • Nicko808
    Nicko808 Posts: 1 Member
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    Jaywalk you are lucky to have access to a gym for $10 a month. I'm in the UK and the cheapest I can find locally is around £30 (about 40 US dollars). And you get up at 4.30am to go to the gym? You have a 2 hour commute? And kids? How many hours sleep do you get a night. Three?
  • JoshD8705
    JoshD8705 Posts: 390 Member
    edited September 2016
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    Lift, and eat what you can at first. You're gonna have newb gains, and look like you lift fairly quickly. Run 5x5 strong lifts, and hit pull ups, and dips. As soon as you have some base strength switch to Wendlers 531 with 2 accessories per lift. Run the accessories is the 8-12 rep range. Keep trying to eat Peanut butter, boiled eggs, oatmeal, potatoes, steak, hell eat pizza, and dollar menu burgers. Just lift and try to gain weight.
  • Alienique
    Alienique Posts: 122 Member
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    In this day and age, there are so many foods out there that are basically caloric bombs and so many preparation methods that can make the healthiest of salads into a recipe for heart attack that if it's a simple matter of putting on some pounds, it's totally doable. Drink lots of sugary drinks, fry your grains instead of toasting them, make butter your go-to dipping sauce, make peanut butter your go-to spread, add nuts, gummies, chocolate pieces, etc., to your ice cream, and just eat lots of snacks. Assuming your appetite is intact and you have no medical conditions preventing you from consuming copious amounts of sugar and carbs, gaining weight should not be that difficult of a venture. Now, if you want to gain in the form of muscle rather than fat, that's a different story.
  • trigden1991
    trigden1991 Posts: 4,658 Member
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    Having a fast metabolism makes it hard to gain weight, My maintenance before was around 6500 calories because I was so active. So don't spend all day in the gym, get in and get out.

    What is your height/weight and daily routine like to maintain on 6500cals? I'm afraid I have to call BS on this.

    Also people don't have fast metabolisms, they have high TDEE's.