Relationships

TheLegendaryBrandonHarris wrote: »

I really appreciate your words, Raina.

Thank you, Brandon.

Lust at first sight yes- love at first sight no. The worst thing ever is loving someone but they don't lust for you

My wife and I met online in an AOL chat room in 2000. We were both in a Cincinnati, Ohio room and she actually wanted to set me up with a friend of hers. But the more we talked the more she grew to like me. We talked for 12 weeks over the phone, IM, and E-Mail before we we decided to meet in a public place. We grew to know each other before we even saw each other.

I do believe in love, I do believe in Relationships, I do believe there is a soul mate for everyone out there somewhere. The problem lays in three folds that I see.

1) Lust. People just others based on looks. We just see someone and think. Well I cannot be seen with them, with their track record. How would it look to my friends if they saw me with that person. They're not pretty enough for me to hang around with.. Instead of looking on the inside. Emotional Love is attached to the persons emotional and mental side.

2) Internet Dating. With sites like Tinder floating around you're doing noting but projecting your wants every before you're getting to know someone. Which Stems from my point above. Then you have places like Match[dot]com where you can go out with someone one time and instantly think "Yea/No". People do not really get to know each other before moving forward.

3) Entitlement/Selfishness. Everything wants to think What can this person do for me. That's not how a relationship works. It's always "What I can do for that person". How can I make them happy. What can I do to see them smile, or feel loved. Instead we live in the Generation of the Gimmie Gimmies, and it's even stemming into the dating world.

Love is a Battlefield; we are strong

I think yes, love at first sight is superficial. You are coveting someone for their looks as you know nothing about the person they are. My first husband told me he fell in love with me across the room at a party. But infact what he fell in love with was at that moment I was having a great time and was surrounded by people. Plus I was younger than him. So I represented all the things he wanted to be at the time. Trouble is, I am generally not that sociable and every one gets older. I don't think he ever forgave me for not living up to his first impressions of what he thought I was like.
Anyway, yes I do believe in love. But it takes time and hard work. And the best love goes hand in hand with lust. If you have both in a relationship you're onto a good thing.

Trying to characterize being in a relationship as a general concept is pointless. Being in a relationship isn't inherently better or worse than being single, it depends on the person and the relationship. Of course, I'm sure everyone knows someone that perpetually bounces from one relationship to the next but I imagine it's hard to find actual happiness that way.

I for sure do not believe in love at first sight. I also think people overly romanticize and idealize concepts of love and relationships. It's not about the grand gestures, it's about finding someone you can be happy with doing normal boring things.

The first night I met my husband I told my BFF that he was going to be my next husband.Yes, I was married at the time. I got divorced from hubby #1 and married him after I only knew him for 6 months. We've been married ever since. That was 18 years ago & now we have 4 kids.

Love is blind but lust has 20/20 vision

I don't trust nobody