Trying to lose half of me. Friends would be cool.

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Skip to the bottom to avoid the whining-brigade.

I lost a ton of weight in highschool. I've always been heavy, but somehow, some way, I managed to lose about 50 pounds in highschool without trying. It was so nice, I looked great. At the time I still thought I was super fat, but looking back I'd kill to be anywhere near that weight again.

I maintained it through the year I was in college, but then some things happened and I had to have surgery and go back home.

I was in a wheelchair for quite a while, and forced to live with relatives who don't care about health at all. They eat garbage all the time -- like, going through a whole bag of candy in under a week kind of garbage. I don't have too much of a sweet tooth, so I don't touch it, and I don't snack because I feel guilty enough about my weight as is. During the period I was disabled, I ended up putting on a little over 100 pounds because of their eating choices and me not being able to exercise to counter it.

I'm no longer disabled, but I'm still stuck in this house because despite looking for a job constantly for the past 10 months, I have not gotten a single bite. Not one interview. I've been doing some freelance work so I don't feel so bad about being unemployed, but it's not anywhere close to a living wage. It's not enough to move out, that's for sure. I can't go out and consistently buy better food, nor can I convince them to stop eating junk meals.

I'm not athletic and never have been. I have no access to any equipment, and I live close to a highway and the thought of going running on that makes me terrified. I feel so trapped and unable to change my body, and I hate it. I'm so fat. I see myself in the mirror and I just feel sick. Every time anything small like a pulled muscle close to my chest area, or a sore arm happens, I get so scared that I'm having a heart attack and I just prep myself to die. This isn't healthy, physically or mentally. No one should have to live like this. I just want my old body back and I don't know what to do. I'm sorry for whining if it comes off that way but I am honestly at my wits end for what to do about my situation.



I don't expect much to come of this attempt since I don't really know what to do, given my current situation, but I guess being around people who want the same thing would probably be a good start.

Replies

  • lisahebert186
    lisahebert186 Posts: 736 Member
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    Welcome and I'll send you a friend request.
  • ceceoplaymate
    ceceoplaymate Posts: 63 Member
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    YOU CAN DO IT! I WENT FROM 200 TO 150 JUST ENTERING MY FOOD AND STAYING SORT OF IN THE LIMIT. JUST STICK WITH IT :)
  • triciale555
    triciale555 Posts: 57 Member
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    Hi. Exercise doesn't need to be done with equipment. Start with small walks around your house and/or Google home exercises. There's a tone of information there that you could benefit from. I'll add you also.
    Good luck
  • PinkPixiexox
    PinkPixiexox Posts: 4,142 Member
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    Hello :]

    I had always, always been a 'bigger' girl - even when I was very young. I remember my mum put me on a child friendly version of Weight Watcher's when I was around 10 years old but nothing would stop me reaching for food. Eventually, I lost 'the weight' and I'm now healthy and It was surprising .. because I didn't have to spend hundreds on gym memberships and special food. I ate what I normally would eat - just less of it. And as for exercise, there are tonnes of work out's on youtube that I do in my living room at home and are just as effective (if not more so) than hours on the treadmill in the gym. I promise you can do this.
  • ErikaHope203
    ErikaHope203 Posts: 113 Member
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    I do pretty much all of my exercise at home (with occasional walks outside etc)...but the majority of weight that I've lost so far has honestly just been from limiting my calorie intake...changing the portions and foods that I eat on a regular basis. It's definitely difficult when others around you aren't "on the same page" as you in terms of eating healthier..I know exactly what you mean. I've had to really change my eating habits independently of what my family members that I live with may choose to eat. I think once you really find that internal motivation to make changes, it becomes a bit easier. Feel free to add me
  • Omar_Apocrypha
    Omar_Apocrypha Posts: 794 Member
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    add me feel free i want that too :)
  • walkermichaelg
    walkermichaelg Posts: 98 Member
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    Hi! I'm relatively new but on here daily. Feel free to add me for support and motivation!
  • MedifastReplacement
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    Never use the word "Try" because the other half of the phrase is "and fail". Make a positive statement that will reinforce your brain decisions for the day. Change your statement from " I don't expect much to come of this attempt" to "I am finding a way to make this work; your brain will do the rest. Say it every time you think of it and each morning. You will unconsciously begin to make choices that will make it happen. Send me an invite, and let's cover each other's back on this.
  • bensmom555
    bensmom555 Posts: 38 Member
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    Please add me as a friend. I think you are feeling like you have no control over your life. Using MFP app can help give you some control. Once you realize YOU are in control of what/how much you eat, you will begin gaining confidence in all areas of your life. Who knows, when you choose to eat only the "healthier" parts of what is being served, you might influence others to start thinking about it more. When you start dropping the weight, they will notice and might be motivated to join you. For example, if spaghetti is on the menu, ask for mostly sauce and hardly any noodles. . . make small changes at first and arm yourself with facts of what you need to do to be successful. Logging whatever you eat here will help you become more aware and you will be in charge! You can do this, you deserve to make yourself be the best YOU that you can be! We are all here to help you become empowered. Let's go for it together!!
  • WaCowboy
    WaCowboy Posts: 42 Member
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    As some of the other people have posted, you don't need equipment to exercise. You can go for walks, yoga, push ups, sit-ups, etc. without needing it. That's what I do on the weekends when I don't want to drive 20 miles to the gym.

    The key here is to set goals, and don't get discouraged when you don't make them. Also reward yourself. A couple years ago when I was first on here I used the site to drop 40 lbs. What I did was reward myself for every goal I made. One was if I worked out and ate right for 3 days I can have 2 oatmeal raisin cookies, those are my favorite treat.

    Just be positive and you will get there. Also feel free to add me as a friend.
  • SavannahJJ93
    SavannahJJ93 Posts: 547 Member
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    I added you!
  • mysteps2beauty
    mysteps2beauty Posts: 494 Member
    edited September 2016
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    Well, you did a great thing by coming here. That's a huge step!

    Walks are great! Feels good, and your spirit gets a lift too. Helps you think of what you can accomplish.
    Running in place for 15 minutes, 2x a day, lunges, squats, sit ups, push ups, can all be done at home.

    Can you go back to school, a community college? You probably can apply for financial aid to pay for it and your books. Sometimes schools have part time jobs for those enrolled in school. Do you like kids? Everybody needs a sitter now and again. Try and volunteer at a place you could see yourself working at.

    You may have some very employable skills but if your energy is low, negative because of your body image, you need to flip the switch. Work with what you have till you get what you want. After you submit your application whereever, you need to write them, call them, or even show up. But exude energy however you do it. Walking will help with this.

    Can you go with them to do groceries? Can you cook the meal for them? When they order take out or whatever, can you ride along?

    If you always get burgers, toss the bread, cheese, and eat the meat and lettuce. That's a protein style burger! Famous out here at In and Out Burgers.

    You have overcome some big obstacles, so you have it in you to succeed. Keep posting! Add as a friend if you want.