Getting my body to self regulate again
srecupid
Posts: 660 Member
I have been counting calories for over a year now. I want to try new things and eat at different restaurants without worrying about gaining weight. I need to come up with a system that doesn't involve counting calories. For people who can just eat til fill and stop how do you do it?
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I can totally relate to this challenge. Up to this point, my approach to dealing with restaurants has been avoidance. I know that's not a reasonable strategy long term, but I hate feeling like I don't have control over the calories. Of course, restaurants serve larger portions and the methods of preparation are higher in calories, so I when I do go, I just order salads with grilled chicken (which, in fairness, I actually love). Moving forward, I'd like to feel comfortable eating out and not stressing over every single calorie that I might consume, but I'm just not there yet. Maybe when my maintenance doesn't feel so new and tenuous?1
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I have been counting on MFP for 2 years and another site 1 year before this one. Besides my changes in fitness/strength training goals, I am done with losing my official weight.
Just today, I mulled over calories today to fit this and that into my day. I had to, otherwise I figured that if I went by intuition that I would have consumed over 2000 calories. I am not ready for that yet. I still eat at restaurants they are planned in advance.. I can eat till I am full but sometimes those calories are just to many to put me way over the top for the day... calorie dense foods will do that every time till you get used to it.
I think the only way you know if you can do it, is to try it for a week and see. You have been counting for a years so have you taken a break at all from counting by going into maintenance? Try it.. do that for a week or so, see how much you can eat at maintenance, what it feels like to eat at maintenance and then take the plunge to not track for a period of time.
If you are still losing and moving to maintenance is not an option, you can still test it out..2 -
I'm a bit wobbly right now with the same thing challenges. Finally recently got down to my goal weight and immediately gave myself a pass to stop with the caloric obsessing, which when combined with restaurant and breakfast indulgence/visit from my boyfriend I ate over 2500 three days in a row and you know what, it just made me feel like obsessing again, and that's awesome. For me a few days of indulgence **I hope** doesn't mean every day is going to be like that, or that months of work are erased by a few questionable choices (the alcohol is what really gets me). I'll follow my "binge" with some smaller intake days, boost the salad and the activity and get back on track. Good luck to you, I don't know how many calories you need in a day, but if you did decide to go all out at lunch at an indian buffet or something can you just eat some veggies and hummus for dinner?2
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I really enjoy eating out at good restaurants and calories are simply not a part of choosing a nice meal for me - it's all about enjoyment. It does help that the UK doesn't commonly have the ridiculous portion sizes seen elsewhere and the "doggy bag" culture hasn't made its way here thankfully.
I can't routinely eat until full and satisfied without gaining weight - never could. After 56 years I've accepted that's the way I am so my expectation isn't to feel full all the time. Some of the time yes, but definitely not all of the time.
"Eyes bigger than my belly" as my Mum used to phrase it.
I've never had a problem with unintentionally losing weight!
But I can eat in a thoughtful/mindful way without food logging and control my weight. That's normal for me and my weight loss was just a phase - effectively I previously maintained fat for 20 years (30lbs too heavy).
It took a while to learn how to lose weight without logging though.
I weigh myself daily to spot trends developing and have an upper intervention weight that causes me to be more aware. If I need to correct an upward trend or lose weight ahead of a big event I just either skip breakfast or make lower calorie choices for a while or cut down on some fun snacking. You can be calorie aware without counting.
Try it for a while, logging is always there as a tool in your toolbox.
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We have been through this a few times, so I don't know if you can use it. But if you are ready now - I have learned mindful/intuitive eating through counting calories and the hunger scale. It's not just about what I do, but about what I think and feel and want. I don't just want to not regain weight, I also don't want to overeat anymore. I have to keep in mind that the idea of "full" that I am used to, really means "overly stuffed". I don't like being overly stuffed, so I'm happy with stopping at "satisfied". I just have to do that. So I tell myself that I have had enough, when I know that I have had a reasonable portion. I also primarily stick to foods I can eat to satiety. So I don't base my intake on chips, candy and meatloaf anymore.3
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I think learning to listen to your body and knowing when you have reached satiety is as good as counting calories but it takes a very disciplined person who doesn't deceive themselves (and most of us do). If you don't eat for emotional reason that could work.5
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Well, the thing is, for some people it might be possible to listen to your body and hear that pleasantly full signal if you keep eating slowly and remain mindful while keeping an eye on the scale for any weight creep.
For other people? This might not work.
You could try to see if you're one of these people for whom it works. You could always just eat at restaurants without worry, relying on what you've learned about portion size. Remember what I said about eating slowly. It helps you to realize you're full when you eat slower. Then, at home, you could fall back on being more accurate and mix both methods into a sustainable way of moving forward with life.
This is what I do now. It's too much trouble dealing with logging and weighing everything when we're on vacation, so I don't bother. Oddly enough, I always lose weight after we come back!4 -
When I go out I make sure it counts. I don't mean that calorie-wise but food quality wise. When I go out I want a special meal that I know I could not cook at home and sit in a great environment with waiters that care and who know which wine to serve with which dish, where the fish was caught, etc. This of course doesn't come cheap. As such I don't do it very often, and going over my calories once in a while doesn't matter.5
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My satiety response is so damn delayed (I swear I feel starving until 1-2 hours after I've eaten) I could never do this effectively. I hope you find a good strategy OP!3
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We only go out to eat every 2-3mths, so because of this i eat what i want and don't worry about the calories.0
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For me, it works like this:
Big restaurant meal fills me up and I don't eat for the rest of the day and sometimes still feel full the next morning too. If I under-eat one day, I may be really hungry the next day. If this is happening to you, if you are eating naturally and staying the same weight, more or less, not creeping in one direction or the other, then your appetite is likely working correctly to keep you the size you are.
I watch the scale and freak out if the number is over 140 or under 130 now, so I guess the "freak out" method is part of what I use, in a practical sense. But the weight stays pretty consistently in 135-140 unless I am lifting more than usual (can be heavier then) or having time off for injury/working out lighter (I get lighter then) and truthfully I think even those swings are mostly water, not the body adding or losing appreciable fat or muscle.
So yeah, you can follow appetite and watch the scale, take action when the weight is above a certain number, that action does not HAVE to involve tracking, you could skip supper for a week or something like that.
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I've been working on this lately too. I've noticed that if I focus on hydration and protein I'm more easily satiated. I also agree with the before mentioned mindful/slow eating.0
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Well, I do still log everything, eat lots of things everywhere, so a couple of thoughts.
1. PAY ATTENTION TO YOUR BODY. I know that after a few bites of a high calorie food that I'm full, have gotten a lot of enjoyment after it, and don't need any more. I can just feel it. I remember going to Panera and buying a muffin I really wanted. I ate around 1/3 of it, which was delicious, and realized it was enough. And I stopped eating and gave the rest to my ever-hungry very skinny son.
2. Remember that just because some is good doesn't mean more is better. I'm told in Japanese culture, they are taught to stop eating when they're half full because your body feels fuller and fuller after you stop eating. And it doesn't feel good to be overfull.
3. Weight watchers uses points and not calories. You might like that better.
4. You've logged a long time. I bet you have a good idea about calories. Don't obsess. Guestimate when you're eating someplace new. But keep logging. Or log most of the time and skip meals where you don't want to pay attention. Just keep weighing.3 -
codename_steve wrote: »I've been working on this lately too. I've noticed that if I focus on hydration and protein I'm more easily satiated. I also agree with the before mentioned mindful/slow eating.
Here's the thing though. I can be satiated but if the first door I walk through when I get home is the kitchen I'll still find an excuse to eat something. Or if I'm halfway through with a snickers bar something snaps and I say *kitten* it and have 20 -
codename_steve wrote: »I've been working on this lately too. I've noticed that if I focus on hydration and protein I'm more easily satiated. I also agree with the before mentioned mindful/slow eating.
Here's the thing though. I can be satiated but if the first door I walk through when I get home is the kitchen I'll still find an excuse to eat something. Or if I'm halfway through with a snickers bar something snaps and I say *kitten* it and have 2
Then it's your mind that isn't in the right place. You need to work on it, and you need to be willing to work on it. I have worked a lot with my mind, and I still do, every day.
We are brainwashed with "more is better" and "fast and easy is good" and "I'm worth it". I have come to many of the same conclusions as nxd10 - this isn't sustainable. A more "eastern" approach of enough and balance, is what I strive for, and what I really find most pleasurable. "Zen" has started to be part of many aspects of my life, and I feel much more relaxed and at peace. I don't fret so much over small stuff anymore, and I don't make those little accidents as often (spilling water, burning/cutting myself when I prepare dinner etc). This has to do with looking ahead more, and meal planning and waiting to eat has taught me to look ahead and be more patient.3 -
codename_steve wrote: »I've been working on this lately too. I've noticed that if I focus on hydration and protein I'm more easily satiated. I also agree with the before mentioned mindful/slow eating.
Here's the thing though. I can be satiated but if the first door I walk through when I get home is the kitchen I'll still find an excuse to eat something. Or if I'm halfway through with a snickers bar something snaps and I say *kitten* it and have 2
After seeing this, this is where self discipline and perhaps will power or call it self control that is needed per se. Your mind and body both have to be in sync for this whole thing to work as its supposed to.. A person has to make conscious efforts to stay on point every single day.
This appears to be completely behavior driven if you walk through the door and cannot walk into or by the kitchen without eating something, something is till out of balance. Perhaps play with the idea that when you walk into or by the kitchen, are you eating to supply your body with fuel or are you eating for the sake of eating?
It is certainly fine to eat out in restaurants, eat foods like snickers bars, and enter the kitchen and grab a snack, its knowing where you are with your diet at that time of day, and know consciously what you can and cannot have these are ALL CHOICES.. so you decide the choice at the moment, if you cannot make the right choice, then know it might not be the choice that keeps you in line with your goals.2 -
I self-regulate, and have lost most of the weight through self-regulation rather than calorie counting. For quite a while I just had to accept that I wasn't going to feel fully satisfied when I finished a meal. The point at which my body says "I'm done" is usually well past the quantity of food I actually need. Now what I previously considered "full" I consider to be uncomfortable.
I'm terrible with sugary things and they are my go-to overeating foods. Because of this I do little things to reduce my chance of having *kitten* it moments. I don't keep sugary treats in the house (the best I have is dark chocolate and grapes). I keep a water bottle with me at all times. I clean my teeth soon after eating. After eating in the evenings I don't even go into the kitchen. Often when I want food but I'm not really hungry, I do something to keep myself away from food, like walking the dog or taking a bath and by the time I've finished I do actually feel full. Often I try to think "Do I really want this?" or "Is this going to make my health better or worse?" and if the answer is "I don't give a *kitten*", then I need to use any remaining will power to remove myself from temptation ASAP!
I'm not perfect but I don't beat myself up when I overeat and I try my best not to use it as an excuse to say *kitten* it. I've found that the longer I self-regulate, the easier it is. At first I felt like I was hard work but now I don't even think about it.0 -
codename_steve wrote: »I've been working on this lately too. I've noticed that if I focus on hydration and protein I'm more easily satiated. I also agree with the before mentioned mindful/slow eating.
Here's the thing though. I can be satiated but if the first door I walk through when I get home is the kitchen I'll still find an excuse to eat something. Or if I'm halfway through with a snickers bar something snaps and I say *kitten* it and have 2
I agree with what kommodevaran said about "Zen". For me it's been about balance. I've recently been doing some self discovery about my personality type, which tends towards getting so passionate about something that I eventually burn out. In regards to food, this expresses itself as being OBSESSED with a particular something for about two weeks, then never thinking about it again. So for me the balance is allowing myself to have it but being aware. Something about being aware that I don't need it but want it makes it easier to only eat a little. It's like people on here are always talking about "there are no good foods and bad foods". Tell yourself it's ok to have the snickers, be aware of the sensations of every bite, maybe even stop halfway and wait a few minutes before eating more. If you decide that answer is yes, then don't feel guilty.
Sorry if that's kinda rambly haha, but the connections make sense in my head.0
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