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krissagirl0709
krissagirl0709 Posts: 291 Member
in Chit-Chat
So I'm just so stressed ! My 7 year old (who has tons of behavior issues and attention seeks often) told his therapist my boyfriend was choking him and pushing him so of course she made a report and cps wants to meet with us tomorrow (this happened Tuesday) my boyfriend don't see an issue as he said he pulled his shirt a bit to get him to get off his bunk bed when he straight out refused and he pushed like guided him around the block to walk to school when my son refused. I feel bad cuz I asked for the help after having attempted to get my son to get going for a half hour I ran out of time due to needing to get to work and running late due to the behaviors. I'm just so frustrated. My boyfriend is not a violent person and neither am I . We don't spankings or anything like that (lots of people tell me I should but I think that would make problems-behaviors worse) I'm actually a social worker and I feel like my life is going to fall apart now. My kids don't get abused and I've worked so hard to be where I am ( had kids as a teen, graduated, 7 years of college with working on my MSW, I'm only 26 my kids are 7 and 9) I need support :(

Replies

  • km8907
    km8907 Posts: 3,861 Member
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    Reporting and investigation is mandatory, but if there's nothing wrong than nothing will come of it, but you need to talk to your son about why he said what he said. No accusations cause he could be making it up, but you never know.
  • krissagirl0709
    krissagirl0709 Posts: 291 Member
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    Well I did talk to him but he told me and his therapist the same but the therapist version was more extreme.
  • Starman02
    Starman02 Posts: 181 Member
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    Oh girl! Chin up! Don't stress when there's nothing to stress over. Like you said it didn't happen- but it is mandatory for them to do a follow up- let them :smile: Everything will turn out okay xo
  • Gimsteinn
    Gimsteinn Posts: 7,678 Member
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    How about believing the kid until proven other wise? Kids should always be believed in these situations. He's your kid, what if he's telling the truth??
  • Gimsteinn
    Gimsteinn Posts: 7,678 Member
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    Villae81 wrote: »
    Its funny how people with no kids giving advice lol

    I have 2
  • Gimsteinn
    Gimsteinn Posts: 7,678 Member
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    Cutaway_Collar wrote: »
    HeyaBerg wrote: »
    Villae81 wrote: »
    Its funny how people with no kids giving advice lol

    I have 2
    He was hitting out at me ;) Not you.

    Ahh then it's fine ;)
    Villae81 wrote: »
    HeyaBerg wrote: »
    Villae81 wrote: »
    Its funny how people with no kids giving advice lol

    I have 2

    ? I said the ones with no kids

    Sorry, you posted right after me and actually @Cutaway_Collar gave the perfect answer, kids or no kids.
  • DeficitDuchess
    DeficitDuchess Posts: 3,099 Member
    edited October 2016
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    Villae81 wrote: »
    Its funny how people with no kids giving advice lol

    While I haven't put my opinion, before this post & didn't birth/adopt children, I raised my siblings & myself; being a child once'd grant credence also!
  • DeficitDuchess
    DeficitDuchess Posts: 3,099 Member
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    Villae81 wrote: »
    DeficitDuchess wrote: »
    Villae81 wrote: »
    Its funny how people with no kids giving advice lol

    While I haven't put my opinion, before this post & didn't birth/adopt children, I raised my siblings & myself; being a child once'd grant credence also!

    Being a child once doesn't count you'll never know what your parents gave up or sacrificed so you can have so and so or worked that extra shift so they can buy you a bike or you'll never feel what they've felt when you told them the bike is ugly it's not what you wanted.

    I am referring to, the context of abuse; which is what this thread's concerning!
  • km8907
    km8907 Posts: 3,861 Member
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    Villae81 wrote: »
    Lol not just you cutaway there's 2 more people

    I'm a social worker.
  • krissagirl0709
    krissagirl0709 Posts: 291 Member
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    Just a update looking back on this, they did there investigation and all my boyfriend and myself got from it was how well we were doing and handling the situation. I didn't resist the investigation there is no point in fighting making sure my child is safe, I want him safe and I would do the same looking at other situations because you just don't know. At the time though I had just applied for a job I wanted super badly in the CP department and for this to happen really sucked but it passed by and they had seen his behaviors in person during the meeting. Since I have got his therapist more involved by having an extra skill practing session. Behaviors both at home and at school have decreased a ton which both myself and his therapist are praising a ton! My boyfriend and him continue to get along great. I might look at some of his acting out towards my boyfriend who has been there consistently for 2 years as some thing that was really hard for him with his own father relationship being estranged . Just an update looking back on this, I appreciate the kind words. I'm a social worker too so I have always looked at the safety of my kids, including safety from my own child's behaviors as well.
  • angelxsss
    angelxsss Posts: 2,402 Member
    edited February 2017
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    .
  • krissagirl0709
    krissagirl0709 Posts: 291 Member
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    No problem, I appreciated the support a lot, and being a social worker myself I will also use this to have empathy with my clients in the future because it's not easy opening your life up to others.
  • DarlingNikki2011
    DarlingNikki2011 Posts: 287 Member
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    krissagirl0709 wrote: »
    Just a update looking back on this, they did there investigation and all my boyfriend and myself got from it was how well we were doing and handling the situation. I didn't resist the investigation there is no point in fighting making sure my child is safe, I want him safe and I would do the same looking at other situations because you just don't know. At the time though I had just applied for a job I wanted super badly in the CP department and for this to happen really sucked but it passed by and they had seen his behaviors in person during the meeting. Since I have got his therapist more involved by having an extra skill practing session. Behaviors both at home and at school have decreased a ton which both myself and his therapist are praising a ton! My boyfriend and him continue to get along great. I might look at some of his acting out towards my boyfriend who has been there consistently for 2 years as some thing that was really hard for him with his own father relationship being estranged . Just an update looking back on this, I appreciate the kind words. I'm a social worker too so I have always looked at the safety of my kids, including safety from my own child's behaviors as well.

    So glad it all worked out! Keep doing what youre doing. Your concern shows how much you care and love your children. You just want the best for them.

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