I'm mad
my3suns1984
Posts: 4 Member
I'm starting over...AGAIN! I can't believe I'm back here and this time heavier than the last time. I'm mad at myself for gaining it all back and then some. I'm mad that I have to think about my food choices every minute of the day. I'm mad that I can't eat what I want. All I think about is the long road ahead...and I'm pissed! Anybody else feel the same way?
2
Replies
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All the darn time.0
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Being mad is a choice. Not a particularly good one since it raises your blood pressure and can cause health issues if sustained. Not to mention it doesn't help. It just makes you miserable.
Okay you messed up. The good news is you know what you need to do to fix it and you know you can, because you have done it before. Take it as a learning experience and go forward.
I don't like having to think about what I eat so much either but I don't like paying bills, cleaning house, or being careful with my bank account either and I still do it without being angry about it.
Such is life.
Spend your energy looking for things to be glad about and changing the things that can be changed instead of dwelling on those you can't.5 -
I've yo-yoed multiple times. I totally understand the frustration. Many people regain when they return to the normal way of eating they had at the higher weight. Since smaller bodies use fewer calories, the pounds creep back. If you want to keep the weight off, you need to eat for the smaller body. You can eat the foods you like, but you do need to eat smaller portions or make satisfying substitutions.
Think of calories like money.
I would love to be able to spend as much money as I want whenever I want. Since I'm not rich, that's not going to happen. I need to stay within my means and keep track of my spending or else I will overspend and go into debt.
I'm now tracking my food and plan to do that forever. It's just a part of life if I want to sustain weight loss. I brush my teeth and shower and all of those other hygiene things so what's one more thing. If I want to sustain weight loss, I'm going to need to come to terms with the reality of paying close attention to my food intake. I don't have to always be perfect but I can't overeat week after week if I want to avoid regaining.6 -
Yes, anger is a wasted emotion. Logically I know you're right. I want to get into that headspace where I'm beyond this ridiculousness. Trying to focus on being healthier and hopefully as a result the weight loss will follow. I know I need help so went to a nutritionist for guidance because doing nothing is just going to make everything worse.2
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First off you CAN eat whatever you want. You just need to stay within your calorie goals. I lost 70 pounds and ate whatever I wanted. I've kept the weight off for almost 3 years so far. I still eat whatever I want. Maybe you need to adjust your thinking.
What you do is go on a diet then revert to your old ways once you reach your goal weight. What you may want to consider is a lifestyle change. I still eat pizza, steaks, ice cream, pastries, and all the other good stuff. The lifestyle change involves understanding how much you consume. Instead of five slices of pizza I eat two. Instead of a 16 oz rib eye I get a 6 ounce one. Instead of a large banana split I get a small cone. Instead of four donuts I eat one.
I hope this all makes sense. Have fun and enjoy the ride.4 -
Been there for sure. Many times. Frustrated, sad, miserable, desperate, pissed off, hopeless, resentful...
Now I've decided to just accept that I gotta do what I gotta do if I want to live the life I want - which includes being healthy and fit and at a healthy weight.
I'm giving myself over to the process instead of fighting it or feeling sorry for myself. I've decided to be committed & consistent. And STAY committed once I lose the weight this time so it's the LAST time I ever have to do this.2 -
Amen!!1
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my3suns1984 wrote: »Yes, anger is a wasted emotion. Logically I know you're right. I want to get into that headspace where I'm beyond this ridiculousness. Trying to focus on being healthier and hopefully as a result the weight loss will follow. I know I need help so went to a nutritionist for guidance because doing nothing is just going to make everything worse.my3suns1984 wrote: »Yes, anger is a wasted emotion. Logically I know you're right. I want to get into that headspace where I'm beyond this ridiculousness. Trying to focus on being healthier and hopefully as a result the weight loss will follow. I know I need help so went to a nutritionist for guidance because doing nothing is just going to make everything worse.
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Something that can help is knowing your true macros and just eating within your macros. I used to hate always having to count calories only to find that just one thing could make me go over and undo everything I've done but really understanding the science of food (real food) and knowing what you can use to replace crappy processed foods that taste just as good can really be a fun and exciting experience. It also helps that I love to cook and I have multiple people to cook for and they don't even know everything I cook is macro friendly.1
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my3suns1984 wrote: »Yes, anger is a wasted emotion. Logically I know you're right. I want to get into that headspace where I'm beyond this ridiculousness. Trying to focus on being healthier and hopefully as a result the weight loss will follow. I know I need help so went to a nutritionist for guidance because doing nothing is just going to make everything worse.
Did you go to a nutritionist or a dietician? Anyone with no training can call themselves a nutritionist. If you did you may want to rethink.
http://eatrightdc.org/dietitian-vs-nutritionist/
From the article:
"Dietitian vs Nutritionist
DIETITIAN
Definition: A dietitian is a health professional who has university qualifications consisting of a 4-year Bachelor Degree in Nutrition and Dietetics or a 3-year Science Degree followed by a Master Degree in Nutrition and Dietetics, including a certain period of practical training in different hospital and community settings (in the U.S. 1200 hours of supervised practice are required in different areas). Some dietitians also further their knowledge and skills by pursuing various Specialist Dietetic qualifications. Dietitian is an expert in prescribing therapeutic nutrition.
Regulation: All qualified Dietitians should have met national/international standards for professional legislation. The title “Dietitian” is protected by law in many countries such as Canada, USA, South Africa, Australia, and the UK.
Work: Dietitians can translate the science of nutrition into everyday information about food. They also have special skills in translating medical decisions related to food and health to inform the general public. Dietitians can work in both the hospital and community. They may work with people who have special dietary needs, inform the general public about nutrition, evaluate and improve treatments and educate clients, doctors, nurses, health professionals and community groups. They undertake the practical application of nutrition with both individuals and population groups to promote well – being and to prevent nutrition related problems. They are also involved in the diagnoses and dietary treatment of many diseases, such as food allergies, kidney disease, diabetes, cancer, etc.
Your safety: Registered Dietitians are members of one or more professional bodies, and therefore they are held accountable for their conduct and the care they provide. Because of this, the reliability and safety of their professional advice and care are ensured.
NUTRITIONIST
Definition and Regulation: A nutritionist is a non-accredited title that may apply to somebody who has done a short course in nutrition or who has given themselves this title. The term Nutritionist is not protected by law in almost all countries so people with different levels of and knowledge can call themselves a “Nutritionist”.
Work: There are also qualified nutritionists, who are people who have completed University Degrees in Food Science, Human Nutrition, Food and Nutrition, or Food Technology. They are also called Food Scientists. University qualified Nutritionists and Food Scientists normally work for food manufacturers, retailed businesses, in research and public health promotion. Some may work as Dietitian Assistants or Food Journalists. Nutritionists do not have any professional practical training, and therefore they should not be involved in the diagnosis and dietary treatment of any diseases.
Your safety: Since the title ‘nutritionist’ has been used by many unqualified people to describe their involvement in food and nutrition related practice, you should be careful when choosing a qualified nutritional professional."
And don't be mad. Eating to lose weight and improve your health is a personal choice. Embrace it. If you don't want to and are going to feel mad, just don't do it.3 -
my3suns1984 wrote: »I'm starting over...AGAIN! I can't believe I'm back here and this time heavier than the last time. I'm mad at myself for gaining it all back and then some. I'm mad that I have to think about my food choices every minute of the day. I'm mad that I can't eat what I want. All I think about is the long road ahead...and I'm pissed! Anybody else feel the same way?
Nope, not yet and hopefully never. Sorry I can't empathize. Sometimes I get mad, even angry, when I need to exercise (long walks) because I'm inherently lazy when I'm home. I always feel better afterwards though. My maintenance calories without exercise would be super low because of my age so I worked this in before I hit my goal. It took losing 104 pounds to get to where I'm at and I will never forget the back and knee pain that I endured before losing this weight. Maybe you could find an activity that you'll grow to love so you don't have to keep starting over.0 -
I hear you, seems you have to get mad enough to actually do something about it. Today I am back and have to do it this time!2
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First off you CAN eat whatever you want. You just need to stay within your calorie goals. I lost 70 pounds and ate whatever I wanted. I've kept the weight off for almost 3 years so far. I still eat whatever I want. Maybe you need to adjust your thinking.
What you do is go on a diet then revert to your old ways once you reach your goal weight. What you may want to consider is a lifestyle change. I still eat pizza, steaks, ice cream, pastries, and all the other good stuff. The lifestyle change involves understanding how much you consume. Instead of five slices of pizza I eat two. Instead of a 16 oz rib eye I get a 6 ounce one. Instead of a large banana split I get a small cone. Instead of four donuts I eat one.
I hope this all makes sense. Have fun and enjoy the ride.
This. Absolutely.0 -
Personally, I'm eating all I did before but smaller portions. I find it fun to think of foods to eat that i didn't eat before, since I'm eating more often now. Before mfp I only ate 2 meals a day but too much of it. Before i stayed away from bread & potatoes(i love potatoes) but now i have both every day bcuz they're filling. I still make room for my lays chips (1 oz). I use the nutribullit to make filling fruit/veggie shakes. I would say find things that are filling & leave room to eat things you love, just weigh them & enjoy. Also drink water after you eat & wait 20min & you won't be hungry. One of the new things i found to eat for evening snack is 1/2 C of oatmeal with a few frozen fruits, 1 Tbl no sugar added jam & a tub of my coffee creamer(25 cal) I'm never hungry0
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I hear you completely!!
I've been there for SOOOO many years, especially being just 4'11" tall (which means my body doesn't require a lot of calories or else I put on weight).
It's taken decades for me to get to this point:
--> I am on a diet that reduces cravings and I am never hungry.
So instead of being forever hateful and spiteful for being so short and not being able to eat what a 6' tall man can eat, or having to work out 100hours a week, I am enjoying the food I am able to eat daily, with a few treats here and there.
Good luck.
Amanda
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All good advice everyone. I truly appreciate the frankness. I didn't even think about macros, dietitian vs nutritionist, or the mindset of giving myself up to the process. It helps to be able to reach out to someone...anyone and they'll be there with encouraging insight. Thank you.1
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what happened to you, happened to me...more than once. I am getting to old to keep repeating this cycle because one of these days I'm not gonna be able to do the cardio I need to do to get it off quickly. NOW, is not that time. I am already down almost to a "normal" weight and am finding that when I get to treat myself with a food it is so much more special and tasty, than having that food everyday. You can do this, again and keep it off this time.
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I can relate so much. I hate obsessing over what I eat... but I have learned there's not much in between for me0
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my3suns1984 wrote: »I'm starting over...AGAIN! I can't believe I'm back here and this time heavier than the last time. I'm mad at myself for gaining it all back and then some. I'm mad that I have to think about my food choices every minute of the day. I'm mad that I can't eat what I want. All I think about is the long road ahead...and I'm pissed! Anybody else feel the same way?
Its only a method or tool to use to lose weight... its not a chore and its certainly not punishment..
And yes you can eat what you want.. And if you stay pissed, you might stay in a state of mind thinking about this as an obsession.. its not.. there are thousands of successful MFP'ers here.. You get out of it what you put in it.
And in the long run, you might find that this method you have chosen to lose weight might not be the "right" method for you.. Either way its all about a calorie deficit (eating less food) to lose weight no matter the method.0 -
Maybe it would help to think of which good habits you could start and keep permanently? I would never be happy tracking every bite of food forever, but I can commit to stepping on a scale once a week and acting further if it shows I've started to slide. And I will not weigh what I eat unless it is an impulse snack - then I'll measure out 1 "serving" and see if I want more later. Those are small changes that I can stick with forever without resentment.
In the short term when I hate logging food or exercising on a grey day I remind myself that this part at least is not forever.0 -
Sometimes you have to get mad, but the reality is that it will be another futile effort if you're not COMMITTED to doing it. If you have any reservation at all that you can't do this now, then don't. Just a like smoker or alcoholic needing to change, you have to be ready to do it and in the right place in your head. If not, it will be a half hearted effort and that usually leads to poor results.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
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