:) Proud of how far you've come, but don't want to tell anyone because...
HeyJude007
Posts: 69 Member
you feel you don't look any different. That's when you have to remember why you started...and focus on the bigger picture. Which won't be me.
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Being a very large person the last time I successfully lost a serious amount of weight no one noticed until I had lost 50lb. Being reliant on others peoples feedback for motivation would not have worked out very well. Fortunately I feel better as soon as start getting rid of excess baggage. I agree we have to do it for ourselves and be self motivated in order for it to work.13
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judynelson007 wrote: »you feel you don't look any different. That's when you have to remember why you started...and focus on the bigger picture. Which won't be me.
I never told anyone I was losing weight.
I don't start conversations about weight.
No one has said anything about my weight loss.
I'm not going to bring it up because:
I've been trying to lose weight for 15 years. I've lost and gained before. It is embarrasing even though I have been very succesful this time.
I don't want to be praised insincerely or questioned.
I don't want to invite comments on my appearance. I didn't feel bad about myself.
I am losing weight to be healthier and to me my health is a private matter.20 -
I don't want to be the topic of conversation and be the center of attention. I don't bring it up, but when it's people who've known me for 5+ years, they can tell I've lost weight and want to talk about how great I look. You can't exactly disguise a 180# weight loss.14
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I don't like people focused on me and my body. Most people do not care at the end of the day.2
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My weight loss has been such a gradual loss over the past two years that only my Mom really noticed. I can see the knowing looks on some of my friends faces when they see me after not having seen me in awhile, but they still haven't said anything. I have lost around 30 and I still have 10 or 15 left to lose, but it is not in my personality to talk about myself without being prompted to, so I don't bring it up as well.4
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I haven't told anyone whom I have not seen in several years. Why? Because they do not need to know that I gained over 100 pounds to begin with.
If they were to see me today, after many years of not having seen me, they might think that I gained 5-10 pounds, rather than the fact that in the past two years, I have lost 102.13 -
A pound here and there may not feel like much, but stay consistent!! Stick with it and you'll totally be thanking yourself later when those single pounds here and there result in a BIG change!!!1
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Only my close family has noticed I have lost 45 pounds and obviously the MFP community. I still wear my old clothes to work with large sweaters and belts. Nobody has noticed and I don't care for them to notice9
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For the ones I haven't seen in a while, it will be more fun to wait and see the looks on their faces.
Those that I see all the time already know. They are familiar with my routine and see what I am eating. They regularly ask what the total is as well as tips on food.4 -
Thank you, for your input. 265# and only 42 days of charting... And nothing good comes from tootin you horn. Let's stay focused and beat this weight issue.3
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I haven't told everyone what I did weigh at the outset and exactly how much I have lost up until now!!1
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What were their responses??? Have you lost a lot? I am just in the beginning of my journey. Trying to comprehend making it into a life long structure. I do believe now, that is the only way to maintain from doing this over and over again.
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Because I don't want my daughter to hear it over and over again and become overly critical of her weight and looks simply because it's a common topic. I try to keep it about health, but it's hard when people comment so often. And although I do, deep down inside, like to hear that I look great, a part of me (not near as deep down inside), cringes every time someone says "you've lost so much weight, you look great!". I know they don't mean I looked awful before, but that's what I hear. I'm trying to self love and replace it immediately wirh a silent "I also looked great before. Now I'm just thinner. Not more beautiful, just healthier".
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I keep it to myself. In the past I have mentioned losing weight and then everyone would look at me differently and constantly making negative comments.
If someone brings it up and notices it it feels great. If not then it doesn't matter because I'm doing it for me.3 -
You are all right, I am doing this for my self. We are doing it to be healthier.1
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I beleive you all have valid reasons. However along the journey it is good to have supportive friends on MFP as they are like minded and in the same boat4
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I've enjoyed the compliments and said thank you and moved on. A few have asked how I did it and I said reducing calories and using the MFP app. EVERY single one of those few who asked how I did it blurted out that it's too much work. So I change the topic. (They are right-it is a lot of work but I want it bad enough.)
I got called "scrawny" by a co-worker. (I'm 5'2", 158 lbs-far from scrawny) and it hurt. I also got told yesterday I "look like a completely different person." I know it was meant in kindness but that hurt too. I'm just more of a fragile flower somedays I guess.
No matter what, it's for ME and MY health.3 -
Unfortunately many people don't know how to compliment, or mention the changes they see in you in a constructive or supportive way. It's nice to get feedback until you get a back-handed compliment like, "Wow, you use to be so huge, now look at you!"
For me personally, there's a lot of shame associated with my weight and any time someone comments, I want to make a quick get away. I don't want to discuss my weight related challenges with people I see regularly, or irregularly. Here on MFP, there's less risk to the discussion, and you can more easily dismiss tactless or unhelpful comments.
I come here to boast about my successes and moan about my challenges. It's just overall safer here than in real life!2 -
I guess, because, a few people I know, who stop by all the time to visit, all they talk about is their diet, on how they don't drink pop. And doesn't my wife look good. She stands and twirls waiting for a compliment on her outfit, nails. So I give them, every time on every thing she wants me to take notice of.... and never gives one back... on any level of thanks for any thing. I know it's just them... their personalities.0
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I'm 62 what do I still get so .... move on Judy.0
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I'd lost a stone since May and no one noticed. I showed a friend (she lives in London and I live near Cardiff so don't see each other super often) the photo difference and she just said "you weren't that big" "must be a weird angle". Nope, I was that big. The stone has been hard work and I've got another to go.
I'm doing this for me. Not for praise. But it's disheartening when no one even notices!0 -
I myself never comment on weight loss or gain unless they are very close to me and I know they are trying to gain or lose or gain weight. As a personal anecdote, I have a very slender friend who often eats quite fattening foods. The people who comment on how it must be nice to be so small and eat like that don't realize that he is losing weight because he doesn't eat nearly enough. I did give an atta boy when he gained two very hard won pounds.1
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I never mention my progress to anyone but people (even strangers) notice and ask about it or mention it to me.0
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I'm learning from all of you this is a personal journey. I still have no Idea on how much I have lost, but am following staying in the guide lines. 3 months of charting is coming on Nov 24 ... thanksgiving. It will be a fun and grateful day being with my family.1
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I work in IT - mostly guys. The few women I work with noticed & complimented me on how good I looked pretty early on, but the guys didn't start telling me I looked different, did I change my hair? until after about 50 pounds - cracked me up.1
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