To lose or not to lose

LivLovLrn
LivLovLrn Posts: 580 Member
edited September 30 in Chit-Chat
I have been thin most of my life, and consequently, most of my married life. So when I gained 50 pounds due to illness I assumed that he would be happier with me losing the weight as much as I would...though he has never made me think I am anything but beautiful to him.
But lately I am beginning to wonder if that is true. He hasn't really said anything, but I get the feeling he likes a little more to hold (because when I say my normal body shape is thin, I mean THIN)...so though I don't want to stay at the weight I am at, I am wondering about maybe trying to keep a little more on; keep some of these curves for my honey

Replies

  • mapinkerton
    mapinkerton Posts: 147
    You should ask him!

    Mary
  • CuteAndCurvy83
    CuteAndCurvy83 Posts: 570 Member
    you've gotta do what makes YOU feel good, as long as you are healthy and that extra 50lbs isn't hurting you keep it.
  • gnat45
    gnat45 Posts: 833 Member
    You could keep 20 or so.
  • Amo_Angelus
    Amo_Angelus Posts: 604 Member
    do it, keep some curves, but only enough that you both feel comfortable. Talk to him and ask him outright. I've always been thin, I'm talking runway thin here, and recently I've gained a lot. My fiancé loves that I've got more curves, and I actually enjoyed not being a stick, I'm just too curvy to be comfortable now, so I'm going to get back to the point we both like (basically when I lay down and gravity pulls my stomach down, that' the hape I want to be standing and relaxed) slender enough that I don't feel like a beached whale but with enough curves that he doesn't feel like he can snap me in two.
  • abymari87
    abymari87 Posts: 2
    :smile: I would suggest for you to do whatever makes YOU, and only YOU, feel better... I understand you want to look 'good' for your honey but if it's not what makes YOU happy then it's not worth it. Also, do it for your health.
  • Bambi4U
    Bambi4U Posts: 8
    You should do what YOU makes you happy..........that is why I am trying to lose the 60-70 pounds I've gained. If YOU want to gain weight for YOU then do it, but if you want to lose then do it just for you.
  • helenbeee
    helenbeee Posts: 130 Member
    Maybe come from another angle it might be healthier for you to have a little extra covering so maybe your goal is to be the helthiest you can. Your actions could be to make sure you eat properly and exercise moderately. I know someone like you and whilst its very easy for someone who carries too much weight to think you are lucky watching my friend trying to keep his weight at a healthy level makes me realise that it can be even more difficult for him to manage than it is for me to lose weight.
    Speak to your husband by all means just dont make him responsible for the outcome. This is about you and Im sure after watching you go through your illness all he wants is for you to be healthy and happy and that independent girl he knew before the illness. This is an opportunity for you to show him you are ok mentally as well as physically so think about your goals for the future and decide what is best for you.
    PS: it really is lovely to hear someone come through illness back to health well done!
  • superteetee
    superteetee Posts: 5 Member
    Your weight goal needs to be based on how YOU feel about your body, not about how anyone else feels about it. If he loves you, he will be happy to sacrifice those extra pounds that he likes so that you can be happy, healthy, and confident in your appearance.
  • Becky1971
    Becky1971 Posts: 979 Member
    I think as you get stronger and can do more than just cardio, you'll lose some, and will probably find that you don't necessarily feel the need to lose all of the 50. Definitely you have to do what you will feel comfortable with, and obviously he is going to love you all the same. But just go with it for now, and see where you end up at, you may be surprised at how he responds even though right now he seems to enjoy what their is to enjoy.
  • LivLovLrn
    LivLovLrn Posts: 580 Member
    I'm not sure he would be honest with me about whether he wanted me to lose it or not....not in a bad way, but because he would be afraid to hurt my feelings.
    I don't mind the extra curves; to an extent, but definitely want to loose this belly roll!
  • purplefancy
    purplefancy Posts: 5
    anyhow, just follow your heart.

    To lose as possible as you can
  • helenbeee
    helenbeee Posts: 130 Member
    ah yes the belly rolls is there ever a circumstance where they are ok I think not! :laugh:
  • Becky1971
    Becky1971 Posts: 979 Member
    Jeff never said anything negative about me, it was always that I was beautiful and other things too. But as soon as I started losing the weight and all, I could tell he really liked it. In some ways, I'm more curvy then I was before, because my hips are more smoother, and the arch of my back shows, and things like that. So definitely just work at it and see where you are at, what you are comfortable with, and I bet your husband is not going to mind it at all. :)
    I'm not sure he would be honest with me about whether he wanted me to lose it or not....not in a bad way, but because he would be afraid to hurt my feelings.
    I don't mind the extra curves; to an extent, but definitely want to loose this belly roll!
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