I can't get my shi*t together

ellliemaeee · February 2017

For as long as I can remember, I've needed to and wanted to lose weight. I jump on the bandwagon just to jump right back off. Now, I'm the highest weight I've ever been and severely unhappy with myself...not necessarily because of the weight but because of my lack of effort to fix it.

Five weeks ago, I started working with a personal trainer and nutritionist. While I've been diligently attending all of my workouts, I still can't get my nutrition on track. I know what I NEED to change in my life to meet my goals, but in the moment, I always talk myself into ordering the fries or getting takeout instead of cooking dinner.

So I guess why I'm here, is that I'm looking for other people like me. Do you struggle to stay on track? Or, if you used to be this way, what was your final breaking point? How did you finally commit?

MsBuzzkillington · February 2017

I struggle hard core with the eating thing. It's so hard to get that one down.

Heather4448 · February 2017

I've always been big, but I never stuck with any diet/exercise plan long enough to see real results. What worked for me is... well, my life got flipped, turned upside down. (Yeah, I just did that!) I started going to the gym just to do something for myself and no one else. I worked out a little and then had my reward: I showered at the gym after my workout. I could use as much hot water as I wanted. No one was banging on the door and ratting out a sibling or asking how much longer I would be. I really looked forward to my shower everyday! Going to the gym became a habit and I started tracking my activity and adding goals.
So... this was a very long winded way to say the following: (1) Make healthy habits (2) Give yourself a reward (3) Make small, attainable goals every month. That's what worked for me.

SammiG01 · February 2017

I think it is key to figure out why we don't allow ourselves to be successful. Why do we sabotage the weight loss that we want so badly and need for good health. What are we afraid of? What are we angry about? This is what I'm working on and I could relate to what you were saying OP.

UK92 · February 2017

The reason I found it so hard to commit in the first place was because I was being too strict and expecting miracles to happen in a short period of time. I'd last a few days and back to my old habits. You don't have to give up on your favourite foods, just fit them into your daily calorie goal. Also, if you have a bad day don't be too hard on yourself, they happen and you just have to keep going. You can do this!

GemstoneofHeart · February 2017

My story sounds just like yours, just I had my breaking point last October. What worked for me was making my husband take full body pics of every angle and just making myself study them and see just how far out of hand I've let it get.

Now, I take progress pics often! Sometimes 2 or 3 in a week. It's so satisfying to line them up with my ones from last October and see the difference.

prattiger65 · February 2017

I think you will have better chance at success once you stop restricting food groups, especially foods you love. Eat what you want in moderation, particulate in the beginning as you are learning. When I lost my weight, 60 pounds, I ate ice cream every day. I still eat what I want, my wants have changed a little, but for me to succeed, I have to eat what I like, I just can't eat ALL OF IT.

LaBlanquita7 · February 2017

Girl. You are speaking my language. I read something earlier tonight (by writer Laura McKowen) that I loved and so I offer it here for you:

The normal question is, "Is this bad enough for me to have to change?"

The question we should be asking is, "Is this good enough for me to stay the same?"

And the real question underneath it all is, "AM I FREE?"

SadDolt · February 2017

longest i've been on track these past 4 years was 2 weeks straights. it's like my body wants me to gain back every pound i lost, even if i only lose 4 pounds. as soon as i gain back the 4lbs the binges stop. i recently started upping my calories. maybe your calorie goal is too aggressive

or doing too much at once

i don't even bother working out until i get my eating under control.

owlcake · February 2017

I feel the exact same way!! Waiting for my moment where I figure it out. I want to loose so bad

Dreamcrusher16 · February 2017

I love junk food, planning is really what helps me. Plan the meals for the week, buy the groceries for those meals, take lunches to work. It's when I get lazy and fall behind on meal prep that I slip with the diet.

potatowhoruns · February 2017

Try to take things one day at a time - I find that if I think too much in the long term, I start to overthink things.
I do struggle, but I just remember what I am trying to achieve to help keep me on track. Change one thing until it becomes a habit, such as drinking more water or eating more fruit/veg, have a takeaway less regularly, once a month rather than once a week for example.
Everyone is different and something that works for you might not work for anyone else but all you can do is try - what have you got to lose!?

Flissbo · February 2017

LaBlanquita7 wrote: »

Girl. You are speaking my language. I read something earlier tonight (by writer Laura McKowen) that I loved and so I offer it here for you:

The normal question is, "Is this bad enough for me to have to change?"

The question we should be asking is, "Is this good enough for me to stay the same?"

And the real question underneath it all is, "AM I FREE?"

Thank you for sharing this, I think if I can change to this mentality it will really help me. At the moment all those little things I am eating that "won't hurt" have added up and I have regained lots of what I lost. I don't want to stay how I am now and I think this quote will help. I am going to print it out! Thanks again :-)

Best of luck to the OP! It is hard, but I think the hardest bit is getting started. You got this!

leoniemcdee · February 2017

I just got really sick of feeling bad. My poor diet was making my reflux worse. Lack of exercise wasn't helping my mental health. And I felt self-conscious ALL the time. I hated being in photos and buying clothes. I'm 20lbs down, 20-30 more to go (haven't decided where I'll settle yet) and I feel LOADS better. Healthier, slimmer and more self-confident.

It's the ultimate act of self love to give yourself what you really want. It is hard work, it is a struggle but the rewards are more than worth it.

Also, it's really important to remember that you can't be perfect at it. You don't have to go to the gym 7 days a week and eat 'clean' (which is a BS term anyway). For weightloss, all you have to do is eat less than you burn. Moving more helps too but isn't necessary. I would simply recommend it for all the other amazing benefits.

suzesvelte · February 2017

I have had endless arguments with the two voices in my head. I have recently learnt some stuff about how our brains work and this has helped me a lot to make sense of this apparent contradiction in my own head.

Basically the bit that wants to indulge and eat all the time can be seen as a very primitive / animalistic bit of the brain. OR like a toddler that wants immediate sensory gratifiation all the time.

It is more complex than this, but I have found it really useful to identify that "chimp" voice using this simple metaphor and just tell her she has had her banana, or some grapes, and she is not in charge - the adult brain is in charge she has to get back into her cage. It makes me laugh and discharges the tension ...

It doesn't work all the time, depending on the stress of the context, but it works several times a day!
I have also done other things to identify specific habits that I want to change, which I know are MY trigger spots to over-eating in certain situations. e.g. I know I tend to go in search of chocolate when I go shopping after my gym trip - so I started to pack a flask of coffee and a banana to eat in between and then I dont feel so empty or in need of a treat when I go to the supermarket.

So far these simple devices are working pretty well for me.

If this sounds interesting there is more info on this sort of brain activity on this site:
http://brainoverbinge.com/blog/

Good luck
x

jennjune2014 · February 2017

ellliemaeee wrote: »

For as long as I can remember, I've needed to and wanted to lose weight. I jump on the bandwagon just to jump right back off. Now, I'm the highest weight I've ever been and severely unhappy with myself...not necessarily because of the weight but because of my lack of effort to fix it.

Five weeks ago, I started working with a personal trainer and nutritionist. While I've been diligently attending all of my workouts, I still can't get my nutrition on track. I know what I NEED to change in my life to meet my goals, but in the moment, I always talk myself into ordering the fries or getting takeout instead of cooking dinner.

So I guess why I'm here, is that I'm looking for other people like me. Do you struggle to stay on track? Or, if you used to be this way, what was your final breaking point? How did you finally commit?

My final breaking point was my health. I was in ICU for 8 days. My heart stopped. I now have a second chance to get my health in order. It was the push i needed to commit.

Without the struggle there is no progress. Every day is a new dream. Commit to your plans for that 24 hours. Wake up and repeat the process. When you have a set back, acknowledge it and get back on the horse. Focus on what you did well for the day.

(If you let yourself wallow in set backs. It makes it eaiser to justify not changing) dont let a bad day derail all your hard work.

Things to try.

Get foods that are not in your plan out of the house

Find some great healthy recipies. Go grocery shopping

Pre make meals. Freeze them.

Prepare for cravings.
Salty.
Jerky , quest protein chips, parmesan cheese crisp. Pizza stuffed mushrooms.

Sweet.
Rasberries with light whipping cream. Or dannon light n fit greek yogurt.
Strawberries dipped in chocolate
Sugarfree cheese cake pudding with a scoop of protein powder. Top with fruit or sugar free cholate or caramel syrup.
Sugar free vanilla pudding pumpkin puree pumpkin pie spice vanillia protein powder.

courtneyfabulous · February 2017

Take it from me- GET YOUR DIET ON TRACK. You will be completely wasting your time, money and effort to see a personal trainer if you are not doing the nutrition side of things. How many calories are in that takeout meal? And how many calories did you burn during that personal training session? I bet the take out meal beats the exercise by a lot... the old saying "you can't out exercise a bad diet" is absolutely true. People also say that weight loss is 90% diet 10% exercise (some say 80%/20%)- I would argue it's 100% diet! Exercise helps you preserve muscle (if you're doing strength training and actually using your muscles not just doing cardio), and helps increase your calorie expenditure... but if you are consuming more calories than you burn you will never lose weight/fat no matter how much exercise you do.

I'm saying this as a wake up call that I wish someone had given me... I spent 6 months doing a ton of hiking and at home workouts with no weight loss, then spent 9 months and THOUSANDS of dollars training with a personal trainer with no weight loss. I did gain some muscle and build stamina, but my goal was fat loss and I didn't have ANY despite all that time, $, effort... UNTIL I GOT MY DIET UNDER CONTROL. I wasn't even eating badly during this whole time, I was eating healthy foods for the most part, but too many calories. But as soon as I started using myfitnesspal and actually stayed within my calorie goal so I was in a caloric deficit I immediately and finally lost weight.

So hopefully this will help you make better eating decisions and stay within your calorie goal. You don't even need to cut out ALL takeout and fries- but only in portions that fit into your total calories per day. It is also much easier to stay within your calorie goal if you eat more nutrient dense low calorie foods and less calorie dense nutrient devoid foods... and much better for your long term health too- but you should still be able to fit in some treats now and then so you don't feel deprived.

Remember you've only got 1 body and 1 lifetime- how do you want your body to look and feel? What do you want your health to be like? How do you want to feel about yourself? How long do you want your life to be? Are those fries really worth staying overweight, unhealthy, being embarrassed every time you walk into a room or try to find a cute outfit to wear? Is the convenience of take out food worth a shorter life span and weight related health conditions?

Think about your goals and priorities. Then make the necessary changes to get what you want.

courtneyfabulous · February 2017

I also find visuals helpful...

Here is me, the picture on the left is my starting point - actually this was after about 6 months of hiking and home workouts, but no calorie tracking. I was eating healthy foods but in too large of portions and too many carbs, not enough protein. That doesn't look like the body of someone who eats clean and healthy and goes hiking several times a week and does home workout videos every couple days, does it?? But it is.

The middle picture is me after 9 months of joining a gym and having 2 sessions a week with a personal trainer plus at least 1 more gym workout on my own, plus home workouts and hiking too. Still eating clean and healthy too... but still no weight loss! A little toning but that's it.

And the picture on the right is me after just over 4 months of the same workouts and same types of foods, but WITH tracking calories and staying within my calorie goal (and also making sure to get enough protein each day). I wasn't even starving or anything, I chose a very mild deficit for slow weight loss.

So now you can clearly see the impact that getting your diet in order can have, right? It makes all the difference!! 9 months of no weight loss vs 4 months of steady weight loss- and the only difference was diet.

I'm not done yet BTW, I still have some more weight to lose- but just thought I would share this to help you see how important the diet part is to weight loss. It is essential!

gemstoneisland · February 2017

courtneyfabulous wrote: »

spent 9 months and THOUSANDS of dollars training with a personal trainer with no weight loss. I did gain some muscle and build stamina, but my goal was fat loss and I didn't have ANY despite all that time, $, effort...

I wholeheartedly second this! I did the same - KILLED myself in the gym with a personal trainer for months and months (and wasted $3000!), only to lose 4 lbs. Not only was that a motivation-killer, but the training sessions were way too hard on my body (I'm not in my 20s or 30s anymore) and my body started to break down.

Now I'm back to it, and determined to get my diet piece sorted out.

I can't get my shi*t together

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