What should I name my son?

I worked in a hospital for 15 years -- the worst baby name that I heard of was a daughter named Placenta....

Anything but "Aiden" or anything that rhymes with it. Nowadays, you can't swing a dead cat without hitting three or four kids with those names. And I swing a lot of dead cats.

Melvin

Alferd Packer

'There’s that famous story that I’d always heard that during the sentencing, the judge said something like “Packer, you voracious son of a b!tch, there were seven Democrats in Hinsdale County and you ate five of them.” That turned out to be completely apocryphal.'

Myles

If I had one it'll be Sebastian though I've heard that it's come back into popularity.
How about...
Boyd
my mom almost named my little brother Guy Dude

Kitten.