Weight Loss and Dating!

Julee84
Julee84 Posts: 15 Member
edited November 16 in Chit-Chat
I'm currently on a weight loss journey/lifestyle change. I gained weight after a severe back issue and surgery. (Steriods suck) I'm finally on a good path. What are people's thoughts on Dating during this time. My fear is someone wont except me for me...and if they don't like me now, they don't deserve me later after I get to my goal. But, I would like to get back into the dating scene. At times I want to get on a dating site and at other times I just get nervous I will scare people away.

I also feel it's probably not the best time to get into a relationship. You know how early dating is, lots of going out and dinners. ( better cardio, lol jk) but my main focus is on my fitness journey.

Thoughts??

Replies

  • DeficitDuchess
    DeficitDuchess Posts: 3,099 Member
    edited March 2017
    I only sought/accepted men that, didn't have; a body type preference & was honest concerning the, state of; my current body/my plans for, it but also warned that, I might gain; even more weight. None of us know for, sure if we'll accomplish; our goal or maintain it if we do, so always present; it all but it goes both ways, it isn't right to seek that; if you're unable to be that yourself!
  • jennybearlv
    jennybearlv Posts: 1,519 Member
    No reason not to date. If you are open and honest about your weight loss they can decide if it bothers them or not. Going out to dinner is a great way to casually introduce the weight loss topic. It's always nice to know on the first date if they are supportive of a healthy lifestyle.
  • try_harderG
    try_harderG Posts: 626 Member
    Life 's too short. Fulfill your dreams x
  • inertiastrength
    inertiastrength Posts: 2,343 Member
    I would definitely date regardless. You don't look obese so if someone can't deal with 20lbs I probably wouldn't want to be with them anyhow. My bf and I are both into fitness but we get fat and shredded a couple times a year depending on bulking and cutting cycles (he's always bulking on my cuts lol). If a man doesn't love you for 20lbs he can kitten off
  • xtcasy
    xtcasy Posts: 6 Member
    Your sex erotic love life is up to your mood about it. If u really want it, it will happen by itself.
    It's not worth thinking about it as a problem to solve it. whatever will be, will be B)
  • 4legsRbetterthan2
    4legsRbetterthan2 Posts: 19,590 MFP Moderator
    I dont think I would ever want to be with someone super particular about body type/size. If you meet someone you really click with there should be a reasonable amount of chage in each others bodies that's acceptable.

    Keep in mind dating doesn't all have to be just eating and drinking. Hubs and I first date was bowling, and I think 2 was minigolf. I tend to like stuff like that early in relationships bc it gives something to talk about automatically and helps cover up awkward "so what do we talk about now" moments. Go sight seeing, go to an outdoor festival, go pick pumpkins or berries or whatever....get creative with your options :)

    Good luck!

  • Julee84
    Julee84 Posts: 15 Member
    fascha wrote: »
    I would definitely date regardless. You don't look obese so if someone can't deal with 20lbs I probably wouldn't want to be with them anyhow. My bf and I are both into fitness but we get fat and shredded a couple times a year depending on bulking and cutting cycles (he's always bulking on my cuts lol). If a man doesn't love you for 20lbs he can kitten off

    Unfortunately, I have a lot to loose. :( I'm 5'8 so I hid it well. But your so right. Thank you!
  • Julee84
    Julee84 Posts: 15 Member
    xtcasy wrote: »
    Your sex erotic love life is up to your mood about it. If u really want it, it will happen by itself.
    It's not worth thinking about it as a problem to solve it. whatever will be, will be B)

    I know, I know. I never try to hard to meet anyone or date. I just think this part of my life would be great to have someone share it with. Even someone to do it with. Your definitely right, whatever will be, will be. Thanks for the comment :wink:
  • Julee84
    Julee84 Posts: 15 Member
    4legsRbetterthan2 wrote: »
    I dont think I would ever want to be with someone super particular about body type/size. If you meet someone you really click with there should be a reasonable amount of chage in each others bodies that's acceptable.

    Keep in mind dating doesn't all have to be just eating and drinking. Hubs and I first date was bowling, and I think 2 was minigolf. I tend to like stuff like that early in relationships bc it gives something to talk about automatically and helps cover up awkward "so what do we talk about now" moments. Go sight seeing, go to an outdoor festival, go pick pumpkins or berries or whatever....get creative with your options :)

    Good luck!

    I love this! It's very true. I fell like guys my age (33) just seem to not like someone my size. The truth is I guess i could try harder but maybe I'll just do me and hope someone great will come along.

    I love that and agree, it shouldn't be all about eating and drinking. Doing things more interactive is always way more fun anyways. :smiley:

    Thanks!
  • Julee84
    Julee84 Posts: 15 Member
    try_harderG wrote: »
    Life 's too short. Fulfill your dreams x

    It definitely is...which is one reason I'm changing my life. My sister in law passed last year at 32. She had Lupus and was in kidney failure...but that's not what she died from. It was very unexpected. Life can change so fast, you really have to fulfill your dreams and live life....
  • EricNewark
    EricNewark Posts: 295 Member
    Be you. Be open. Flirt a little. Don't go "looking" but don't be closed off either.

    At 31 I had almost given up on dating. Many Ms. Wrongs along the way. I said the heck with it and just decided to be open minded and stopped "looking". Met my wife a couple months later :)
  • 4legsRbetterthan2
    4legsRbetterthan2 Posts: 19,590 MFP Moderator
    Julee84 wrote: »

    I love this! It's very true. I fell like guys my age (33) just seem to not like someone my size. The truth is I guess i could try harder but maybe I'll just do me and hope someone great will come along.

    [/quote]

    I feel ya, I felt that way alot too, but them I met hubs and he is just perfect for me. I have gained (he seemed not to notice, but maybe he just kept it to himself while I was being in denial) and lost (which he has been very supportive throughout) with him and he has never made me feel that his affection for me has changed due to any of it. You will find someone you click with well, hopefully it doesn't take too many frogs first!
  • gamerbabe14
    gamerbabe14 Posts: 876 Member
    Who cares what size men do or do not like...you should be dating men YOU like in whatever size you are currently in. Stop the self sabotage, plenty of men aren't that superficial. And to those that are, bye Felicia.
  • IslaTiempo
    IslaTiempo Posts: 530 Member
    Put yourself out there. There is always someone for anyone. Men can particularly be one way with their friends, and society let's them believe there is only a certain type of woman they need to be dating but really, men know what they want.

    Jus have standards and self respect. B)
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