New mom - exhausted and overwhelmed tips ?
f1tforever
Posts: 39 Member
Hello everyone .. before getting pregnant with my daughter who is now 10 months I always made time to eat healthy and exercise.
Fast forward she is still waking up every 2 hrs at night to breastfeed . I am just exhausted and by morning can't even think of eating better or getting any exercise .
Any tips or suggestions ?
Fast forward she is still waking up every 2 hrs at night to breastfeed . I am just exhausted and by morning can't even think of eating better or getting any exercise .
Any tips or suggestions ?
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Replies
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Realize that this doesn't last forever and enjoy your baby. Fitness will come.10
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Chef_Barbell wrote: »Realize that this doesn't last forever and enjoy your baby. Fitness will come.
Pretty much this!
But also, still waking every 2 hours at night to nurse at 10 months old is on the extreme side. Have you introduced solids? How often is she feeding during the day? Do you co-sleep?1 -
Take mult-vitamins, to make sure you meet your needs as well as hers. I think some of the pregnancy vits on the market say specifically that they're also suitable for breast-feeding mums.
If you have family (I know many people don't, but if you do) and they come round to admire the baby (bet she's gorgeous!), give them jobs to do to help you out. Don't be shy about saying you're shattered and you could do with help.0 -
If you want to lose then start with a calorie deficit. That's really all you need to lose weight. Exercise is great, but if you can't make it fit right now then don't sweat it. I didn't start working out until my youngest was 5 (3 years ago). I make time for my exercise now (built a gym in my home so its either 5am or when they are playing with friends). Just do what you can and build from there with time.0
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Suggestion number one! Get your thyroid checked. After my first baby I developed nodules on my thyroid. My thyroid was actually leaning toward overactive and I was very tired. I did not know the tiredness I felt was not normal. I mean it was like, crazy tired, extra exhausted with brain fog and all that great stuff. Only when I was in my second pregnancy did the discovery of my thyroid problem come around. Thyroid problems after pregnancy are much more common than people realize. So that is where I would begin.0
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waking every 2 hours at night to nurse at 10 months old is on the extreme side. Have you introduced solids? How often is she feeding during the day? Do you co-sleep?
If I recall correctly (mine is in school, so it's been awhile since the multiple night wakings), frequent feedings like this happen during a growth spurt. If that's what it is, ride it out; it won't last forever!
If this has been ongoing, is there a chance that it's not breastmilk that Baby needs, but comfort? I remember reading that giving extra cuddles throughout the day can help, and helping her to figure out other ways to fall asleep might help: rocking, patting her back, etc.
Regarding healthy meals: are you able to do food prep on the weekend? I used to do a bunch of cooking and freezing of meals on Sunday, and then mindlessly (and sleepily) pop things in the microwave as needed.1 -
Chef_Barbell wrote: »Realize that this doesn't last forever and enjoy your baby. Fitness will come.
^^THIS^^ enjoy the baby!! Fitness will come. Clean dishes will come. A tidy house will come. Sleep will come.
I've got 2 kids now and the 2nd is 11m. I didn't figure out how to fit exercise back into the new normal until my oldest was almost 2yrs old. About a month after I had figured out my new routine and what was gonna work for me I became pregnant with #2. I had a safe plan outlined for how to workout while pregnant. But my second pregnancy was sooooo much different than the first. Migraines, light headedness and feeling dizzy were the norm. In the 3rd Tri I ended up being able to move again and exercise in appropriate ways for my body, my baby, and my current health.
Since the second baby I took things slllooowwwwww in order to work with my body and help it recover after two pregnancies. I plan to have more kids! I wanted to get back into fitness for my mental health and also to prepare for a few more babies.
Try not to worry about if it will ever happen. You will figure out how to fit it in. Especially because you're asking about it. (I'm interpreting that info to mean that you care about it enough to make it happen when the time is right) I exercise mostly because it helps me mentally so I'm a more patient mama. I wasn't able to start really pushing myself until the baby started to sleep better. Do not underestimate how DIFFICULT lack of sleep is on your body and your mind. Take it slow.
As for some practical thoughts... check out YouTube workouts. I exercise for 30mins/day 5days a week with fitnessblender.com it's a website run by a husband and wife. All 600+ videos are FREE. I workout with my iPad in the living room during nap time or before the kids get up in the am or while they play (this is a new thing that's possible because of their ages now) if you want to pay a small fee for the website owners to tell you which free videos to do which day for 4-8wks at a time check out their programs. The programs still use the free YouTube videos. But the difference is that it's all laid out for you so you don't have to choose every day. That work is done for you (thus the cost) the programs are repeatable. With no additional cost. Pay once and it's yours forever. Try the low impact program. Or fbreach. Both of these are 4wks long and would be great at helping you ease back into fitting exercise back into your schedule in a way that wouldn't tax you too hard physically since you've had a baby!
Sorry for the novel!!! I just like empowering new moms because it's been SO helpful for me when others have told me similar things!!2 -
All three of mine didn't sleep well until age 2. So it's. Not that abnormal if you ask me. I kept it simple when they were young. Walks with them in the stroller or sit ups a couple times a day when I could fit them in. Every little bit helps. But if you need that nap instead of working out, then take it! This is a passing phase in life . Do what you need to do to get through0
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Are you still breastfeeding? (No judgement, my oldest lost interest shortly after a year and my youngest was still flashing the "milk" sign at me on occasion after two). Solids will help, but so will a formula bottle before bedtime. Try to keep that kid on a schedule. Up at the same time. Nap at the same time. Bed at the same time. If Baby F1 is in daycare, maybe they are allowed to sleep all day? Request that Baby not be allowed to sleep all day. At 10 mos, Baby F1 should be super mobile and passing out at the end of the day from exploring! Lastly, ask for help mama F1. If you have family, they would I'm sure love to help you with whatever you need! I love this age! So fun and curious! I don't have family, so at times it was all on me and that sucks.0
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I was in your spot about 4 years ago. I did not start losing the weight until about a year ago. focus on your baby and getting sleep. The weight loss will come.1
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I mash up about 1/2 a banana and 1/2 an avacado and feed that to the baby (11m) at bedtime. Then she nurses (if she has room) that has helped her sleep better :-) just throwing out ideas!0
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I started walking with my little dude before the sleeping got better because I simply had to get out of the house and that's what started me down the whole path. I had to plan stuff out pretty far in advance to have a chance of eating better. Also, cosleeping. My 20-month old STILL nurses through the night and cosleeping is the only reason I have any sanity left.0
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f1tforever wrote: »Hello everyone .. before getting pregnant with my daughter who is now 10 months I always made time to eat healthy and exercise.
Fast forward she is still waking up every 2 hrs at night to breastfeed . I am just exhausted and by morning can't even think of eating better or getting any exercise .
Any tips or suggestions ?
Don't add any stress to your life (dieting, pushing yourself to work out, etc). Take walks with you daughter, sleep, and get the calories that you need until she's not nursing as often. I completely understand wanting your "life" back, but this is such a short season in the light of the rest of your life. Genuinely - she will grow up very quickly (mine are 9 & 7), and won't need you as much. There will be time for exercise and pushing your own fitness/aesthetic soon enough.
You're doing a great job.2 -
Put baby in the stroller and go for a walk everyday for half an hour. After a week you will see your mood improving and you'll be able to add something else on.
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Chef_Barbell wrote: »Realize that this doesn't last forever and enjoy your baby. Fitness will come.mabinethin wrote: »I was in your spot about 4 years ago. I did not start losing the weight until about a year ago. focus on your baby and getting sleep. The weight loss will come.
^This and this.
There's so much going on in your life right now. It's tempting to jump back into and want to do it all, but sometimes we just can't. Be kind to your body and keep enjoying your time with your new little one. It really does pass too quickly.
As a point of reference, I didn't feel like myself until my first was 4. With my second, I was back to feeling like myself within the year.2 -
I've got a 6 year old, 4 year old, and 10 week old. I'm lucky because my babies all slept 5-6 hours a night from birth, but I formula feed. Would you be able to pump and let your hubs get up with the baby occasionally so you can get some sleep?
I also have to say that breast feeding takes up a huge amount of your body's resources. I don't think I'd be actively trying to lose weight until the baby was weaned. I know some mom's can do that, but I don't have what it takes.
Be easy with yourself. You grew and are feeding a person from your body. That stuff isn't easy.0 -
I have a 4 and 2 year old and just am able to make this work. Don't rush it. This is a short but beautiful season of life I'd recommend looking for ways to get moving with your little one. Hike It Baby has branches all over and encourages moms and young kids (and dads and dogs and whoever) to get out and go on hikes together. It's excellent and you'll meet some great people. If you are nursing, just keep up that water and good nutrition. Weight loss will come, but many women's bodies hold on to weight while nursing. You are doing excellent! 0
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ohhhh, do I understand! My 8 month old is still waking every 3 hours to eat at night. I'm so tired, but also really frustrated with people suggesting what she "should" be doing. She should be sleeping through the night. We sleep trained- didn't work. She should sleep better if she's eating more- she eats solids, 3 full meals a day- doesn't work. I totally understand being in survival mode and not having energy for eating right and exercising. I also work full time, and it's tough. I recently added in a 20 minute walk with the dog and baby after work each evening. I put on my tennis shoes the second I walk in our mud room, click the baby's car seat right into the stroller, put the leash on the dog and go before I even walk all the way into into the house. I love running and have added a short run on Saturday and Sunday while the baby is sleeping and husband is around. I prepped healthy breakfasts for the week and washed and separated out a bunch of salad greens into containers to include with lunches. Some days go really well, others are a complete loss. The exhaustion really wears down my willpower, so eating unhealthy is common practice right now. I'm just trying to be gentle with myself. When I want to overeat cookies, I pause and think if this will make me feel good. Sometimes, it will and it's what I need emotionally to survive. Sometimes, it won't make me feel good. Be gentle with yourself, and do small things each day that will give you a tiny win for the day. You got this, momma!1
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Chef_Barbell wrote: »Realize that this doesn't last forever and enjoy your baby. Fitness will come.
^^THIS^^ enjoy the baby!! Fitness will come. Clean dishes will come. A tidy house will come. Sleep will come.
I've got 2 kids now and the 2nd is 11m. I didn't figure out how to fit exercise back into the new normal until my oldest was almost 2yrs old. About a month after I had figured out my new routine and what was gonna work for me I became pregnant with #2. I had a safe plan outlined for how to workout while pregnant. But my second pregnancy was sooooo much different than the first. Migraines, light headedness and feeling dizzy were the norm. In the 3rd Tri I ended up being able to move again and exercise in appropriate ways for my body, my baby, and my current health.
Since the second baby I took things slllooowwwwww in order to work with my body and help it recover after two pregnancies. I plan to have more kids! I wanted to get back into fitness for my mental health and also to prepare for a few more babies.
Try not to worry about if it will ever happen. You will figure out how to fit it in. Especially because you're asking about it. (I'm interpreting that info to mean that you care about it enough to make it happen when the time is right) I exercise mostly because it helps me mentally so I'm a more patient mama. I wasn't able to start really pushing myself until the baby started to sleep better. Do not underestimate how DIFFICULT lack of sleep is on your body and your mind. Take it slow.
As for some practical thoughts... check out YouTube workouts. I exercise for 30mins/day 5days a week with fitnessblender.com it's a website run by a husband and wife. All 600+ videos are FREE. I workout with my iPad in the living room during nap time or before the kids get up in the am or while they play (this is a new thing that's possible because of their ages now) if you want to pay a small fee for the website owners to tell you which free videos to do which day for 4-8wks at a time check out their programs. The programs still use the free YouTube videos. But the difference is that it's all laid out for you so you don't have to choose every day. That work is done for you (thus the cost) the programs are repeatable. With no additional cost. Pay once and it's yours forever. Try the low impact program. Or fbreach. Both of these are 4wks long and would be great at helping you ease back into fitting exercise back into your schedule in a way that wouldn't tax you too hard physically since you've had a baby!
Sorry for the novel!!! I just like empowering new moms because it's been SO helpful for me when others have told me similar things!!
Personally I haven't tried these specific videos but I second youtube workouts. I've been trying to find mommy and me workouts and most of them are around 10 minutes long so I'll do two or three on a good day. My little guy is about 4 months old and he generally loves it. He makes a great weight too because as I get stronger he'll get bigger.1 -
Chef_Barbell wrote: »Realize that this doesn't last forever and enjoy your baby. Fitness will come.
Yes, I have a 10 month old that still wakes to nurse at night...once it twice. But, what I keep telling myself is you only have this time to baby your baby. He will only be this small for so long. I have the rest of my life to criticize myself over my weight.
Not until he got older, eating solids and becoming mobile was I able to eat better and take time to prep some food while he was distracted playing with his brothers. It gets easier and it gets better.0 -
Feed her some solid food right before her bedtime and go to sleep! You need to sleep!0
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Yoga helped me to energize. But it's just tiring having a baby and doing all that of the other things in life (working, cooking, trying to samtay awake0
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Thank you so much everyone for your feedback . I completely agree that the baby phase is too short for me to be stressing about weight and exercise. I hope it's true that things get better and I can somewhat get in a healthy groove again. Being a new mom is so much harder than I anticipated ... boy did I eat my words when judging other moms pre- baby lol!
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Oh trust me I have been there... and sorry because many will be shocked but even though I love my daughter more than anything, it was not enjoyable at all... extreme sleep deprivation, frustration over not getting help from my husband at night... It was survival mode basically and I put on 7 kilos over 7 months (on top of the pregnancy weight).
What I did is that when my husband was coming home I left straight away for 30 minutes to the gym...... and surprisingly it helped me feel less exhausted (I started doing that when she was 6/7months old)... now my daughter is 14 months old and sleeping well at night (i stopped feeding her at night when she was around 6 months and slept through the night - 11 hours - when she was 8 months) once I started that and once she slept everything changed for the better and I can say that NOW I am enjoying motherhood. I am so happy this time is over, it felt like an eternity.... good luck !0 -
I've been in your shoes , dear!! Hang in there. It will get better; I promise. My girls are 13 months apart and I was totally exhausted when they were babies. There were days I never got out of my pjs bc I was just so tired and overwhelmed... If she's napping early in the evenings, try to keep her awake until it's her bedtime. I'm sure you've started her on some solids by now so just make sure she's been fed before putting her to bed... Once she's up walking around, you'll start to lose some of your weight bc you'll be chasing her around. Lol .. Best of luck to you.0
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I'm so glad I came across this post. All of these responses are wonderful, and I so very much needed to hear them, too. I'm a new mom, my daughter is almost 5 months, and only now do I understand how exhausting it can be. It doesn't mean I love my baby any less, just probably with a little less gusto, lol. She has had many days lately where she is insatiable, I mean, where does it go?? (I believe she is teething as well.) My own health and fitness has been far from my mind for a long time. So far one of the biggest lessons I've learned: cat naps are a mom's best friend.1
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I also remember saying to my friends that I would gladly take two more kilos for just one night of complete sleep ahahah good times .....not.1
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