Help - I'm a social eater!

Options
LeelaaC
LeelaaC Posts: 17 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
So I just realized something about myself last night... I am a social eater! As soon as I'm at a social gathering, I toss calorie counting to the wind and eat with abandon! This includes birthdays, friends coming for dinner, holidays, vacations. Anytime there is food and people I eat huge quantities of high calorie food, and then am full of regret the next day.

I'm not really sure if I feel I deserve to eat this way when it's a party, or if I just stop eating mindfully and eat more without thinking. Or being a people pleaser, am I eating things like chips and dessert because I don't want anyone to feel bad if I refuse? Or maybe it's all three.

Anyone else struggle this way? How do you overcome it? It would be OK if it was once year on Christmas day, but this is completely sabotaging my weigh loss efforts and in fact, during Christmas this past year I gained a ton of weigh so I would love to find a way to change this behaviour.

Replies

  • getupforchange
    getupforchange Posts: 86 Member
    edited May 2017
    Options
    Comes down to self-discipline and knowing your 'why' I think. Of course you don't want to tread on anyones toes and insult them but really, if you had people over and a couple of them didn't eat the crisps you served as a snack, would you be hurt? If they told you, "those look great but I have a fitness and health goal and I'm doing amazing so I'll pass, but thank you", would you be upset with them? Probably not right?

    If they're good friends they should respect your efforts and so should you. At the same time this is a lifestyle and this won't be sustainable if you never ever, for the rest of your life, allow yourself a couple of treats at a birthday party or over Christmas.

    Anyway my top tips are:
    - Bring some almonds, strawberries or other snacks you know you like. If you feel weird bringing them just for yourself, bring enough for the party.
    - Call ahead to the host of the party and explain that you have some specific health goals in mind and ask about the menu beforehand so you know what to expect.
    - Decide beforehand how much you will eat and what. If there will be cake, make up your mind beforehand - do you want a slice, have one, but have that one slice, not another 3.
    - Eat a proper meal before the party, never arrive starving or you'll be more likely to trip up
    - If eating out with friends look up the menu of the restaurant online, before you go. They will usually have calories for each meal listed on there or you can request a list over email. Decide beforehand what you will order and throw in an extra workout to cover the calories if needed.
    - If on vacation (or holiday where I'm from haha) bring your bathing suit AND your workout schedule. Most resorts and hotels have a fitness centre or pool. Get up, get your normal workout in and the damage done at the breakfast buffet after won't be as bad as if you had skipped the workout.

    Don't know if any of that helps at all but those are things I keep in mind in order to stay focused.
  • ad28517
    ad28517 Posts: 27 Member
    Options
    I like your suggestions!

    When I am at a place that I can't control what is served (aka, Christmas), I try to load up my plate with veggies and protein (like turkey). It's harder to cram in the carbs (stuffing, cookies) onto a full plate! Also, if there's healthy appetizers, like a veggie tray, nibbling on that 20 min before the main meal can help tide you over, and you'll eat less overall. I hate to drink my calories too, so if you feel like you need to have a glass in your hand, opt for water or something similar. Oh, and socialize! Talking during the meal with your fork down between bites will help you feel full sooner.

    My family usually takes a break before the big meal and coffee/dessert. I like to use that time to take a 20 min brisk walk with my mom, aunt, sister. Dessert is my weakness- once a bite doesn't taste as great as the first bite did, I try to stop.

    I definitely think looking at a menu (and nutrition facts) for a restaurant in advance helps me make smart choices :)

    Friends for dinner: throw some chicken in the crockpot with taco seasoning and a jar of salsa. Shred with forks. This is great because (1) it is healthy (2) it is simple (3) it is inexpensive. If you are trying to be really good, put the chicken in a bowl (instead of a tortilla) with some tomatoes, onions, lettuce, peppers (load up those veggies).

    And put the food away when eating is over. I can usually resist those chips/donuts/etc. for awhile, but after they tempt me for an hour or so, I start picking at them...out of sight, out of mind.

    Hope this helps! (Note, please don't think I have this all figured out, I don't lol)
  • EmbeeKay
    EmbeeKay Posts: 249 Member
    Options
    I'm the exact same way.

    I know will be a lifelong goal to learn to eat moderately in all circumstances. That said, I have found it to be very helpful if I can have an "endless" mug of hot tea or a giant Nalgene bottle of water to just keep sipping on. That way I still feel like I'm partaking.

    I get the idea that you don't want to offend the host; still, I hate when I'm at a party chowing down on, say, a bowl of Doritos, and I notice a fit and healthy woman who is NOT eating Doritos and I think, she can get away with not eating these... good grief, I don't have to eat them either.

    I have tried to set a goal for myself that I will only eat those things which truly look delicious, things I can't easily buy for myself at the grocery store... things like homemade dips or desserts that look truly wonderful. If someone brings a platter of homemade baklava, for instance, I feel no guilt about enjoying a couple of pieces. But a bowl of potato chips and dip? Cold pizza?

    Another tip is to get involved in a long conversation far away from the food table.

    Good luck to both of us, this is hard for me too!
  • LeelaaC
    LeelaaC Posts: 17 Member
    Options
    Well I'm glad I'm not alone Embeekay! :) And thanks everyone for all your tips, they are great and will be implementing them. I do think that when we go to our cottage I will bring my scale and my weights - even just to remind myself that I can't take a vacation from being healthy.

    And when we have friends over, I will keep a glass of water in my hand and I like the idea of passing over the stuff I could eat anytime, the junk that comes from the grocery store and just eat homemade goodies... that's a great tip. And I also like the idea of bringing a healthy snack, or if friends are here I'll just make popcorn, or have veggies out. And yes.. I do have to put the food away after.. that's huge!

    Thanks again!
  • BlueSkyShoal
    BlueSkyShoal Posts: 325 Member
    Options
    Hello, fellow social eater!

    Personally I do NOT eat a meal before going to an event, that would be a mistake for me. Because the whole point is that I'm engaging in eating as a social activity, a way to share and connect with others, not just because "omg I'm hungry".

    I actually avoid eating when I know I have a birthday party, gathering, whatever, coming up. Going in to the event, I have a set number of calories in mind for my "limit", and I guesstimate calories on the foods there. I don't really log at parties, just keep a running tally mentally.

    I agree with only going for things that look truly delicious, and passing up on things that are "so-so", or that you could buy yourself from the supermarket.

Categories