Anyone else struggle with self image issues? So I've lost a

beautybrainsbooty
beautybrainsbooty Posts: 122 Member
edited September 30 in Health and Weight Loss
I have quite a bit still to lose (75 pounds) but I've lost 82 pounds as of today. I find myself still feeling super obese. Does anybody else struggle with that. People comment about how good you look or men give you the "heyyyyy now" and you still feel...like it's not good enough?? (I think I should write about this :noway: )

Anybody else with that inadequate feeling?????

Replies

  • Purple_Orchid_87
    Purple_Orchid_87 Posts: 517 Member
    its hard to get out of the mind-set of being big - distorted body image is one of the hardest things to overcome

    ive only lost around 30lbs to date, but i can see a difference only when i put my big clothes back on.....
  • AdoreZel
    AdoreZel Posts: 63
    I suffer from body dysmorphic disorder after losing 50's lbs that sounds similar to how I feel all the time. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body_dysmorphic_disorder
    '
  • lingading
    lingading Posts: 258 Member
    I, as of yesterday, have also lost 82 pounds & still have quite a ways to go.. I get the "you look great" & "hey now"s here & there but I still struggle with my self image. Hopefully one day we'll find we see ourselves just as others see us..
  • NCmcMan
    NCmcMan Posts: 36
    Hi, I just saw your post. I wanted to say "congratulations" on loosing so much weight! I also wanted to tell you that I definitely have self image issues. I weight 500 lbs, so you can just imagine the hell that I go through every day. I ride a motorcycle and I'm always scarred that people's eyes are going to bulge out of their head when they see me coming lol. If I were you though, I wouldn't worry because at the rate your loosing weight, your not even going to be overweight at all soon. I don't even know you and I'm already proud of you. Keep up the great work, and if you want someone to talk to, just msg me..

    Josh
  • MissMaryMac33
    MissMaryMac33 Posts: 1,433 Member
    If you were overweight a long time, its very hard to get your "mind" to catch up with your body.
    It's been almost 2 years since I lost over 100 pounds and I still see the fat girl in the mirror....
    Even when I'm standing next to someone I consider skinny and I can see in the mirror at the gym, we're the same size.
    It's very strange....
  • Qarol
    Qarol Posts: 6,171 Member
    Always feel like that
    I don't know what can be done about it, either
  • Amo_Angelus
    Amo_Angelus Posts: 604 Member
    I used to walk down the catwalk with that exact same feeling. The strange thing is only people who diet/are already slim seem to get it. Gaining weight I didn't have it, but dieting and when I walked catwalks I had it all the time!
  • gunny34
    gunny34 Posts: 68
    Hey... I deffinately struggle with that.. I have been doing this for about 5 months and I am stuck in a rut with my weight loss and I totally feel like a failure. I just keep telling myself it will get better but then there are days when I just give up and I tell myself that I will be "fat" forever. :( I keep going because there are things I want to do and clothes I want to be able to look good in and feel good in (ex. bathing suits) so I keep going. I'm not as strong as I want to be but I'm still hoping I will get there. I'm here because I need ALL THE HELP I can get.. Just keep going for your goal. ;)
  • bunnyb11
    bunnyb11 Posts: 65 Member
    yes my friend i have that well. i am still working on my mindset with this. but still have alot more weight to lose. It will get better with time....

    The best of luck to ya on your journey!!!!
  • SwtKittN
    SwtKittN Posts: 176 Member
    I had a good friend in highschool every now and then she'd be like, hey girl you looking good! You look like you're losing weight! And inside I just felt like she was trying to be supportive, because honestly I wasn't losing anything at all. Even now when my mom mentions that I'm looking thinner, even if by a little it doesn't really register in my brain. It's like she's just trying to be nice, even after losing 30 pounds I don't feel I look any better than I did before :\ But the scale reads less so.. I guess I should be happy. Lots of times the mind doesn't work like that though, at least for me.
  • Monica_has_a_goal
    Monica_has_a_goal Posts: 694 Member
    I'm the oddball here... :laugh:

    I always saw myself as "normal" in my mind because I avoided pictures and mirrors.. I didn't want to face reality..
    Until recently.. a picture was posted of a group I'm a part of and I looked at it and said, " OMG is that me?" :cry:
    Oh and BTW.. it's a pic I have to live with .. It's used in a brochure.. ugh..

    It was all the motivation I needed to get started here on MFP .. and I honestly believe it's saving my life. Thank you MFP :love:
  • cheshirechic
    cheshirechic Posts: 489 Member
    Yes.

    It doesn't matter who says it or how often it's said that I look "great"-- if I feel "fat" or "squishy," that's what stays in my mind. It's hard, but I'm trying to seek help for it.
  • kfitz10103
    kfitz10103 Posts: 354
    I have had that go both ways. When I saw the dreaded "fatso" picture of myself on facebook I didn't realize how big I looked. Then people were commenting on how great I looked in my "fatso" picture. Well that made me feel even worse. So now that I have lost 55lbs I still don't quite see myself how others do. I know in my head I am at a normal weight now, but I still see myself as being obese. I think it just takes time. You can also go the the mybodygallery.com and put in your size to see what others look like at your same size.
  • ElizabethObviously
    ElizabethObviously Posts: 380 Member
    That is totally normal. I think it is because your mind has seen the heavier person, worn the "heavy person suit" for years so in your mind you are used to it. You are used to being this way for so long. Your mind just has to catch up to your body!
  • PalmettoparkGuy
    PalmettoparkGuy Posts: 212 Member
    I think that's pretty common, even for guys.
  • MisterDubs303
    MisterDubs303 Posts: 1,216 Member
    I'm still 80 pounds from my goal, and my biggest fear is that when I reach my goal, my mind will still operate from a fat mentality.
  • christine24t
    christine24t Posts: 6,063 Member
    I definitely have problems with this. i wonder how people I've known forever view me now, and then I wonder what people who meet me now think about my body. When I was at the bar the other day, a couple of random guys tried dancing with me and I was so shocked, and then I realized that I am much thinner than I think I am. Sometimes, I stand in front of the mirror and just look at my body and nitpick dumb things about myself.

    I am about six pounds away from having a "normal" BMI. I know BMI isn't really anything, but being able to say I am not overweight will be so satfisfying when I get there, but I am pretty sure I will still think I am fat.
  • annacataldo
    annacataldo Posts: 872 Member
    I struggle with this as well; I went from 313 to 263 (HW was 325), so 50lbs loss while on mfp, and even though im 5'10" (so i look better than someone who is 5'2 weighing this weight), I still look horrible. People say omg you look amazing... really? Amazing? Yea, I know 50lbs is quite an amazing accomplishment, but when my stomach fat still hangs so low I cant see my "area" without lifting fat rolls, and you cant see my belly button without lifting a different roll, and the fat on my inner thighs bulges out when my legs are together and creates its own little crease of a fat roll (an up and down one), and when my upper arms are over 5" wider than my entire neck, and I still cant see the skin on my back under my love handles... is it really that amazing??
  • daylitemag
    daylitemag Posts: 604 Member
    Apparently this is a very common issue. I literally have no idea what I look like to others. When I'm "skinny" I feel just as bad as I ever did, and when I'm "fat" I really don't "feel" as fat as I actually am. I see pictures of myself now and think "is that really me?" By the same token, if I see a picture of myself when I was at a reasonable weight I think, "how did I NOT feel awesome when I looked like THAT?"
  • Kitty412
    Kitty412 Posts: 152
    You should be very proud of losing 82 pounds.
  • Sublog
    Sublog Posts: 1,296 Member
    I've always found that my self-image lagged behind my physical body by a few months during my 11 month weight loss journey.

    Also, here's a good book I'd suggest reading.

    Psycho-Cybernetics

    Even though I am considered athletic by normal standards now in my body shape, I still struggle to see the fit(ter) guy I've become.

    I want to have the body that completely leaves no cast of a doubt in my mind about how I look. And I won't stop improving my body's composition until I get to that point.
  • rmartin72
    rmartin72 Posts: 1,085 Member
    I have felt that way all my life and untile I realized that, I am the only person can make a choice to change the way I think about myself and do something about how I look and feel inside and the way I think. I had a heart to heart talk. About a year and half ago I gave my life to Jesus Christ and have been working very hard to improve my life and lose 100 pounds. I am taking one day at a time and moving forward and not giving up. I have made a choice to make a difference in my life and help others.
  • lissarv68
    lissarv68 Posts: 61
    LOL it took how many years to see yourself as overweight/obese? Well maybe it takes just as long to change that mental image?

    I know that this weekend I went shopping with my boys (husband & son) and literally did a double take when I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. I stopped and did a couple of goofy poses because I sort liked the image of that woman in the mirror and wanted to make sure it was really me. She was pretty and dressed really cute! My mental image isn't pretty and only wears black clothing that is frumpy and plus sized.

    Yes, I do still see myself as obese even though technically now I'm just overweight.
  • christine24t
    christine24t Posts: 6,063 Member
    this topic also made me think of something else.
    i've never had a boyfriend or had any guy ever attracted to me and i guess i always thought it was because of my weight. I never really understood why though because my other bigger friends have had boyfriends and I didn't. But now that I'm nearly 40 pounds down, and almost to a normal weight, I'm worried. I'm worried that it's not the weight guys haven't liked, but it's me. Does anyone else feel the same?
  • rankailie
    rankailie Posts: 144
    I'm the oddball here... :laugh:

    I always saw myself as "normal" in my mind because I avoided pictures and mirrors.. I didn't want to face reality..
    Until recently.. a picture was posted of a group I'm a part of and I looked at it and said, " OMG is that me?" :cry:
    Oh and BTW.. it's a pic I have to live with .. It's used in a brochure.. ugh..

    It was all the motivation I needed to get started here on MFP .. and I honestly believe it's saving my life. Thank you MFP :love:

    I had the same problem myself. I still even have the problem of seeing myself as way thinner then I am. I would even lie to myself "Oh you're only buying a size 20 because the cut is wrong."

    Its a hard thing to shake, but really seeing 250 on the scale is what did it for me (I associate that weight number with when I feel my mother truly gave up herself on her weight). That jarred me back to reality about my weight.

    But I still look in the mirror and have to remind myself that I'm fat and out of shape.
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