Missed My Goal. Epic Fail? :\

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fanullona
fanullona Posts: 82 Member
in Motivation and Support
I joined MFP 1 year ago for the sole purpose of losing weight and looking good at my sister's wedding. I wanted to be 125lbs. The wedding is on Thursday and I'm 140lbs. I feel like such a failure!

It's not that I had hit a plateau, or that I was "doing everything right" and therefore dumbfounded as to why I wasn't losing more weight. I messed up a lot of times. I went overboard on some weekends. Sometimes I was lazy for days.

But for as many days that I screwed up, there were plenty more that I worked hard and ate right and chose the healthy route.
I'm proud that I managed to lose and keep 10lbs off. But, is that not the point? Am I kidding myself thinking 10lbs in 12 months is a feat worth being proud of?

Has anyone else missed their goal?
Anyone else experienced this type of rollercoaster momentum?
How do you face your goal day (for me it's this Thursday, the wedding) when you missed your goal?

Replies

  • rachelalethea
    rachelalethea Posts: 10 Member
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    10 lbs per year=30 lbs for three years.. the average american gains about 5 per year as they get older.. I would say it is a step in the right direction and better than gaining 10 lbs.
  • NKF92879
    NKF92879 Posts: 601 Member
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    Did you put on that much weight in one year? I'm guessing you didn't. I know you wanted to look good for your sister's wedding, but this is about YOU. Whether it takes you 2 months, 2 years, or 5 years, the point is that you're moving in the right direction. It's OK to be bummed about not getting there, but don't let it get you down. Use that frustration to keep working.
  • tammykoon
    tammykoon Posts: 302 Member
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    I think we have all missed a goal at some point. Was it worth it? Well, you have lost weight. Would you rather have it back? You have two options as I see it. Keep going or give up.

    Why keep going? Becuase you can set a new goal. Maybe it will be to eat healthier meals on the weekends. You have lost, you are smaller and you should be proud!
  • mendogirl
    mendogirl Posts: 87
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    even though your weight loss isn't as big as you hoped, i am sure that you have probably lost inches. think of your physical achievements. i bet you look great!
  • Keegansmum6
    Keegansmum6 Posts: 193 Member
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    Look at your profile picture a year ago could you have done that? To be honest if I didn't know your weight I would have guessed you weighed around 130 not 140 by how strong and fit you look.
  • KimAggie04
    KimAggie04 Posts: 165 Member
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    10 lbs in a year is great. Did you make big changes or small changes that you can continue? If you have made permanent changes to the way you eat and exercise, I think it is a success that you should be proud of.
  • Qarol
    Qarol Posts: 6,171 Member
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    You kinda said it yourself. You were not as disciplined as you should/could have been. Yes, you had plenty of good days, and you lost 10 lbs because of it.

    I understand your frustration, but don't let it derail your efforts.
  • 2tired2think
    2tired2think Posts: 36 Member
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    I had a similar goal for my parents 40th Wedding Anniversary party. Like you, when the day came I hadn't reached my goal. Ultimately, I told myself that the day was about my parents, not myself, and that the people attending were our friends and family who love me just the way I am and do not judge me by some number on the scale. Besides, most could never even guess what that number on the scale was!
  • Emily4H
    Emily4H Posts: 170
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    So not an epic fail. The thing that is a struggle for me in all of this is how "good" you have to be all the time. I have yo-yo'd for years. It is never easy. I think that if you are happy and healthy and your body is happy at the weight you are at - just go with that. Its so easy to gain over a year - 10 pounds down is 10 pounds down. Good job on that 10 and if you want to lose the rest - we are here for you. :flowerforyou:
  • avsingleton
    avsingleton Posts: 98 Member
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    don't sweat it...that won't change a thing. just get a larger size dress and don't forget the spanks. spanks will surly slim u down a size maybe two. u'll have more goals in the future, just let this one be a learning experience...we live and we learn. :wink:
  • pebbles71785
    pebbles71785 Posts: 6 Member
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    If it makes you feel any better, I wanted to lost 5 pounds by my birthday. I made this goal in June my birthday was last week....I did not lose a single pound I actually gained 1 pound. I just got very unmotivated at one point in time because the scale wasn't budging at all, I also felt like a failure. But no matter what you are not failure when you try! Even tho you didn't make your goal in time keep your goal to lose that weight and it will happen. I know how awful it makes you feel but don't let it get you down think of it as a challenge to do better and be more on top of it. Also I totally think losing 10 pounds in 12 months is worth being proud of, it's better than gaining 10 pounds in 12 months :)
    Just believe in yourself and you can do it!! (I think i should be taking my own advice here lol)
  • jamie1888
    jamie1888 Posts: 1,704 Member
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    The number on the scale is arbitrary and not a good indicator of overall health. I've weighed less in my life but I've also never had as much muscle visible muscle as I do know. At my lightest weight, I could never run a 5K as fast as I do now. Have you had your body fat tested? I would make body fat percentage a goal instead of weight.
  • rthompson81
    rthompson81 Posts: 305 Member
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    I had a boss once that said she wanted all of her employees to fail. Sounds strange, but If you constantly reach your goals, then first, you aren't pushing hard enough, and second, you never give yourself a chance to learn from your mistakes. Think of this as one of those "good failures" that gives you insight to what you need to do in the future and that pushed you in the right direction.
  • dfborders
    dfborders Posts: 474 Member
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    OK - so maybe you didn't reach your goal but you did lose weight and keep it off. I lost about 70 lbs but have gained back 45 lbs of it. I have tried losing weight so many times it would take more than my fingers and toes to count. Does that mean I am going to give up!!! Heck no - I am just going to keep trying and when I get really down I remind myself that I haven't gained it all back from my mid-20s!! Go to the wedding, have fun and make a more reasonable goal for yourself. If your food intake is good try setting a goal for your exercise...Just keep going and don't give up!!!! After all after the wedding in a year is the anniversary:wink:
  • Jennyisbusy
    Jennyisbusy Posts: 1,294 Member
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    Not a fail - maybe just a 'miss' So you use your displeasure as motivation to get your booty in gear! Your desire to be thinner/healthier has to be greater than your desire to eat crap. That 's how you face it everyday!

    You can totally do this - you just have to decide that you want to!
  • hiltonheadagain
    hiltonheadagain Posts: 42
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    Stop beating yourself up. 140 is still better than 150! : ) And you will look great in whatever dress you decide to wear. Since ultimately your goal weight is for "you".....your goal date doesn't have to end on the wedding date. If 125 is what you want, keep on going. Do not have a defeatest attitude when you've accomplished something noteworthy. This weight loss stuff is definitely a life style change and sometimes things take a while. So, chin up, have fun at the wedding, and start again working toward your goal! : D

    p.s don't underestimate what a little help from a garmet like Flexees can do!! : ) Marshall's has these body smoothing items for as little as $10.
  • birdielosingit
    birdielosingit Posts: 34 Member
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    Excuse me, but do I see a warrior in your profile pic? Per Dictionary.com, a warrior is a person who shows or has shown great vigor, courage, or aggressiveness. Don't you think you have met that definition? You have continued with your journey not matter what set backs you may have had and you are 10 lbs down. This isn't an epic fail, just part of an epic battle you are on your way to winning. :)
  • kathyhull
    kathyhull Posts: 327 Member
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    January 2009 I set a goal of losing 50 pounds by my 50th birthday that July. I lost 30. Epic fail in some respects but still, I lost 30 pounds and I learned a lot. I've kept it off (most of it anyway). I started again at the end of this past March. I've only lost 10 pounds in the last 4 months. I guess I could be disappointed in how slowly I've done it but, I too have not been terribly disciplined about it. But, I've improved my running time and the length of time I can run before having to walk, I've increased the weights I use when I lift. And I've gotten much better at drinking the water and eating vegies. So, I choose to look forward at what I can do, not backward at what I failed to do. The time will pass no matter what we do with it. I'm choosing to keep plugging away a little bit at a time. You have to be happy with who you are right now - you can't go backward and change anything. We can only learn from our mistakes and go forward with that knowledge.

    Take pride in having lost 10 pounds and "keep on truckin"
  • tammykoon
    tammykoon Posts: 302 Member
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    Excuse me, but do I see a warrior in your profile pic? Per Dictionary.com, a warrior is a person who shows or has shown great vigor, courage, or aggressiveness. Don't you think you have met that definition? You have continued with your journey not matter what set backs you may have had and you are 10 lbs down. This isn't an epic fail, just part of an epic battle you are on your way to winning. :)

    Oh, my goodness!!! I love this!!!!!
  • fanullona
    fanullona Posts: 82 Member
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    thank you guys!! :)

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