awkward question....

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abalicious
abalicious Posts: 361 Member
in Chit-Chat
I feel like I've lost my sex drive... and I'm only 21! I used to be ready for it any time of the day. I thought about sex all the time. And now I'm never in the mood. This has just happened recently, as in the past 2 weeks or so. I've been saying no to my boyfriend, but we usually end up trying anyways, and then I'll just be so NOT into it that we stop.

I've looked up some possible answers and found antidepressants (not on those) or birth control (not on that either but was about 2 months ago) can be a factor, but has anyone experienced loss of sex drive for other reasons? Maybe stress? Do you think my diet change could be a factor?

This sucks!!! :sad:
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Replies

  • Zombriana
    Zombriana Posts: 764 Member
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    I feel your pain... I have been going through the same thing for months. But I'm on BC. So who knows...
    I heard to try ginseng?? idk D:
  • mommyoftwins05
    mommyoftwins05 Posts: 645 Member
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    Stress probably!! Not sure about diet change
  • MegRuthie
    MegRuthie Posts: 147 Member
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    This happened to me, and I'm not sure why either. If you figure out some miracle thing I can add to my diet, let me know!
  • Ajontheguitar
    Ajontheguitar Posts: 695
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    I feel like I've lost my sex drive... and I'm only 21! I used to be ready for it any time of the day. I thought about sex all the time. And now I'm never in the mood. This has just happened recently, as in the past 2 weeks or so. I've been saying no to my boyfriend, but we usually end up trying anyways, and then I'll just be so NOT into it that we stop.

    I've looked up some possible answers and found antidepressants (not on those) or birth control (not on that either but was about 2 months ago) can be a factor, but has anyone experienced loss of sex drive for other reasons? Maybe stress? Do you think my diet change could be a factor?

    This sucks!!! :sad:

    My girlfriend suffers from this. Badly. Very badly. Tell me, any birth control that's new? Any feelings of "numbness" in your emotions? I feel like a damn expert on this :(
  • iwannawearatutu
    iwannawearatutu Posts: 150 Member
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    Going through it as well, for me it's definitely the birth control. I switched to a different type and it seems to help, but maybe going off it is what triggered it with you? I'd ask your doctor, if you're comfortable with them.
  • map1972
    map1972 Posts: 13
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    An awkward answer: It could be stress or depression. Those can also cause you lose interest in sex. It could also be a hormonal thing too. Since you are not on an antidepressant or BC, then those two can easily be ruled out. Have there been any changes in your life? New job? Moved to a new house/apartment? Loss of a family member (or pet)? I know that when I'm depressed or upset, my sex drive goes way down. Being a guy, that says something!

    You might talk to a doctor about it.
  • Revolutionwithin
    Revolutionwithin Posts: 47 Member
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    I get that way from stress. I've had billion crappy things going on the last few weeks and even the idea of a kiss makes me want to roll my eyes. It isn't even anything he's done, I just want everyone and everything to leave me alone.
  • tkcasta
    tkcasta Posts: 405 Member
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    It waxes and wanes, that's normal. Try not to worry. Just because you aren't ready at the drop of a hat, doesn't mean you can't be ready. Give yourself some time...
  • papamurphy
    papamurphy Posts: 5
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    I went through this when I was at my heaviest.

    This is rather embarrassing...

    Human fat breaks down testosterone, which is the key ingredient to someone becomming "horny" so to speak. The more fat you have on your body the more the testosterone your body produces will be broken down and turned into other things... things that dont get you in the mood.

    I had trouble wanting sex, I had trouble performing and half the time would just stop... i thought I had E.D. butreally it was simply a weight issue for me... i have dropped 40 lbs so far and I have noticed a big difference in my sex drive.

    Obviously I am not a woman, so this information might not help directly, but maybe it can give you another avenue to persue, or help you find the right answer. Don't be affraid to ask your Dr.

    I was, but I am glad I did anyway.
  • boomboom011
    boomboom011 Posts: 1,459
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    stress and lack of sleep and possible age. Wait until you are in your mid to late 30s! thats when you really want it, so i hear! :blushing:
  • monocot
    monocot Posts: 475 Member
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    I've been suffering for a while. Sometimes it's just how you feel about yourself. have you been Loving your self image lately or putting negative thoughts upon yourself.
    I find if i eat really crappy, I feel un sexy and don't want to be touched.
  • Ajontheguitar
    Ajontheguitar Posts: 695
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    I went through this when I was at my heaviest.

    This is rather embarrassing...

    Human fat breaks down testosterone, which is the key ingredient to someone becomming "horny" so to speak. The more fat you have on your body the more the testosterone your body produces will be broken down and turned into other things... things that dont get you in the mood.

    I had trouble wanting sex, I had trouble performing and half the time would just stop... i thought I had E.D. butreally it was simply a weight issue for me... i have dropped 40 lbs so far and I have noticed a big difference in my sex drive.

    Obviously I am not a woman, so this information might not help directly, but maybe it can give you another avenue to persue, or help you find the right answer. Don't be affraid to ask your Dr.

    I was, but I am glad I did anyway.

    Me too buddy, you're brave to say it out loud. At my heaviest, it was the WORST. I WANTED sex but could not, ahem, rise to the occasion. It just takes some time for us guys my friend. Now, I'm good to go!
  • triashlete
    triashlete Posts: 3
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    Stress probably!! Not sure about diet change

    Diet change can = stress
  • squashaclein
    squashaclein Posts: 24
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    I feel like I've lost my sex drive... and I'm only 21! I used to be ready for it any time of the day. I thought about sex all the time. And now I'm never in the mood. This has just happened recently, as in the past 2 weeks or so. I've been saying no to my boyfriend, but we usually end up trying anyways, and then I'll just be so NOT into it that we stop.

    I've looked up some possible answers and found antidepressants (not on those) or birth control (not on that either but was about 2 months ago) can be a factor, but has anyone experienced loss of sex drive for other reasons? Maybe stress? Do you think my diet change could be a factor?

    This sucks!!! :sad:
  • i_love_vinegar
    i_love_vinegar Posts: 2,092 Member
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    although it sounds like everything is ok....have you had relationship problems with ur boyfriend?

    asking from personal experience and I'm the SAME age.
  • fbmandy55
    fbmandy55 Posts: 5,263 Member
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    I think it's normal to go through this from time to time. . I know I have in the past for short periods of time and really think it was just things going on in life. When I was 21 I had a boyfriend who I was starting to hate and more recently because of stress. As soon as those issues were resolved I was ready to go! I wouldn't worry unless it becomes prolonged. For now, just be patient an try to relax a bit!
  • 707janette
    707janette Posts: 77 Member
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    On a recent episode of The Doctors TV show they did say that women have testosterone and when it decreases your libido decreased as well. Personally, I have major body image issues that tend to make me not want to have sex. Also, in my opinion 2 weeks is a short amount of time to really get concerned over as it is perfectly normal to occasionally have periods of time that you are just not interested in sex.
  • SueInAz
    SueInAz Posts: 6,592 Member
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    It has been a relatively short time, I wouldn't spend too much time worrying about it. Like so many things, worrying about it will only make it worse.

    If you recently went off birth control pills, that could be at least part of the problem. What are you using instead? Are you maybe worried about that method not being effective enough? I know worrying that I might get pregnant would certainly kill my sex drive! Also, BC pills cause hormone changes and those hormones can affect quite a few things about us. Last year, I went off one type and ended up with horrible acne a month or so later. And I'm 45! I waited a few months, it didn't get any better so I went back on a different brand and it cleared my acne up again (well, as good as it ever is, anyway).
  • kristydi
    kristydi Posts: 781 Member
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    Lots of good advice and suggestions here. 2 weeks isn't very long, could just be a normal downtime. One more possibility, are you pregnant? I wanted nothing to do with sex in the very beginning of my pregnancy.
  • DorkothyParker
    DorkothyParker Posts: 618 Member
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    If you are very worried, see a doctor as it could be medical.
    Barring that, stress and depression are a big deal.
    But really, it waxes and wanes. If you have been with your bf for a long time, sometimes one doesn't have that same fiery romantic urges as before.

    2 weeks isn't a huge bit of time, though your partner might disagree. A little self-romance can be beneficial too. Try that and see if it breaks the seal so you feel ready to be with your partner again.

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