Struggles with saying no

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bnicoletti22
bnicoletti22 Posts: 23 Member
in Food and Nutrition
Hi All,
I wanted to post about this in hopes that some of you might be in the same boat. I do pretty well with eating healthy, until there's something I REALLY want...My weakness is chocolate and italian food...and then my will power goes completely out the window. Afterwards I feel SUPER frustrated with myself, but it feels like my will power just disappears when I'm around things I crave intensely. Does anyone have any tips for being more disciplined when it comes to your biggest cravings?

Replies

  • CMNVA
    CMNVA Posts: 733 Member
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    My only hope is avoidance. My biggest weakness is probably premium ice cream. I have to NOT let it in house. Even treating myself moderately can send me off my path of avoiding it.
  • bnicoletti22
    bnicoletti22 Posts: 23 Member
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    Have you tried Halo Top at all? Some of the flavors are a little weird, but some are DELICIOUS, and they run between 250 to 350 calories per pint!
  • notreallychris
    notreallychris Posts: 501 Member
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    You don't have to necessarily stop eating chocolate and Italian food. Just eat them in moderation, to satisfy your love of chocolate and Italian food. And no reason to feel frustrated. Chocolate and Italian food are not evil. Log what you eat, and adjust where you need to, but don't give up stuff you love.
  • jemhh
    jemhh Posts: 14,261 Member
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    Avoidance/limiting those foods to special occasions works for me.

    I don't like Halo Top or other fake/substitute type foods. If I want something, I want the real thing. I'd rather have real ice cream once a month than Halo Top several times a week, for example. But everybody is different. You need to experiment and see what works for you.
  • kommodevaran
    kommodevaran Posts: 17,890 Member
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    I have become better at saying no after I accepted that it's not so much about willpower and eating healthily or not, as finding out what it is I really, really want. If I want something and I can have it and I have room for it and can afford it, I eat it, no matter what it is. If it's something that just is there, I may choose to eat it, or more often, not. And it's eaten out of the house, and on special occasions. I don't stock up on anything I have trouble moderating. My normal day to day meals are delicious, but not food I have a desire to overeat.

    I plan my meals. I let myself eat anything, I just plan for it. I've realized that if I want something, I want it when I plan, too, not just when I'm exposed to it. And that saying no to that extra cookie or whatever, is in fact saying yes to myself.

    It's not discipline, but structure and habits and self-care and self-trust.
  • MelanieCN77
    MelanieCN77 Posts: 4,047 Member
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    I run into those problems when I let myself get too hungry. If I make myself get ahead of it and prep my food before I'm really starving I make better choices. Also packing snacks when I go out on errands helps a lot of random buying of things I'd rather not be eating.
  • DrizztGirl82
    DrizztGirl82 Posts: 85 Member
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    When you really want those foods and you don't want to waste the calories just remind yourself why you are doing this. Everyone has a million reasons why you are tracking food and working out. Reminding myself helps me a lot. That way I have more motivation.
  • cangler
    cangler Posts: 104 Member
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    notreallychris wrote: »
    You don't have to necessarily stop eating chocolate and Italian food. Just eat them in moderation, to satisfy your love of chocolate and Italian food. And no reason to feel frustrated. Chocolate and Italian food are not evil. Log what you eat, and adjust where you need to, but don't give up stuff you love.

    what he said!
  • French_Peasant
    French_Peasant Posts: 1,639 Member
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    I eat chocolate and Italian food all the time.

    Italian food is part of the Mediterranean diet, one of the most effective, healthy diets/ways of eating out there; it has maintained generations of thin and gorgeous Italian women (and men!) and it's so freakin' delicious. The trick is to have *reasonable* amounts (aka a single serving) of bread OR pasta (unless you can fit doubling up into your calories), take it easy on the olive oil (100 calories in a tablespoon) and eating lightly dressed lean meats, like fish or chicken in a white wine sauce rather than meatballs or something under large piles of mozzarella. Also, Italian treatments make vegetables magically delicious; and remember marinara sauce is a vegetable, with a great nutritional profile. And of course there are all the salads--use a vinaigrette dressing if you need to shave off the calories. I jar my own tomato-basil marinara sauce, make my own dressings, and grow a wide variety of herbs and vegetables that are lovely complement to any Italian dish.
  • cburke8909
    cburke8909 Posts: 990 Member
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    2 approaches
    1. Eat less but eat the best. You want chocolate take your time and obtain the best most delicious chocolate you can and have a reasonable amount of it.(You can do the same with Italian food) The satisfaction factor in this case can be to the extreme helping you resist until it's reasonable to consume more.
    2. Eat it till your sick of it. Intentionally over indulge until your body and taste buds are so saturated with them that you don't want them anymore.(Some people's high tolerance in this regard make this method a predestined failure, so understand that if you try this method and it does not result in an aversion to the irresistible then the method is not for you. You may also want to avoid this method because if it does work very well you will no longer enjoy these foods.)
  • DKG28
    DKG28 Posts: 299 Member
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    knowing my favorite foods are coming, I have to mentally plan how i'm going to approach eating them before i see and smell them. I find it helpful to ask myself: If, on this occasion, I limit my portion size, don't indulge the way i would like, is that going to affect my happiness later today, tomorrow, in the future? The answer is always "nope". But eating too much and regretting it certainly will. Because eating my favorite foods carefree is a psychological urge I've programmed into myself, not a bodily need, I have to prep my mind to eat things I can easily overdo, and before I eat them, to get out of the moment and consider where I want to be mentally when the food is digesting.
  • kenyonhaff
    kenyonhaff Posts: 1,377 Member
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    Instead of going for avoidance, go for top quality and just make it work.

    If my weakness is Italian food, here would be my strategy:

    * Find Italian foods that fit my plan well. Italians are known for quality food that uses a wide variety of proteins and veggies so what are they?
    * Just suck it up and indulge once in a while. It might take a lot of Zumba and skimping on morning calories, but if that Italian restaurant dinner is worth it, so be it.
    * Figure out what it is about your favorite Italian foods you like. Is it garlicky tastes? Fresh made pasta? Herbal tastes? You might find out that you can take those favorite flavors and use them in healthier ways. If you like lasagna, all you need to do is figure out how to make lasagna that's not so heavy on pasta, for example.
  • sofchak
    sofchak Posts: 862 Member
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    So much good feedback on this thread!

    Personal thoughts as I have similar triggers:
    - Regarding chocolate specifically, I read an article about how chocolate cravings can be triggered by a magnesium deficiency. Sure enough, now that I eat a spinach salad 2x a day, the cravings are minimized and when they are intense, not for as long
    - Substitutions can be your friend. I love making zucchini lasagna or pizza on a portobello mushroom. I've also been known to add cocoa powder to yogurt, oatmeal or cottage cheese to get my chocolate fix
    - Plan for it - add the food to your daily calorie allotment and if you know you're going to eat a lot, plan for that. My recommendation would be to portion control any trigger food in advance to prevent overeating. When you want pasta, you have a single serving (or two if that's your plan) ready rather than 5 servings easily accessible. That may also mean cooking and packing up extras before you sit down to eat
    - Give permission to others to help you. If you tend to overeat when eating with others, giving someone permission in advance to tell you that you had one too many servings already can be helpful
    - Use an app to hold yourself accountable. I use a free app called Strides. 2x a day I track this literal item: "rational amount of chocolate". I find that I like having a visual that allows me to see a streak of good days

    Hope some of these ideas help!
  • Locolady98
    Locolady98 Posts: 92 Member
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    Great discussion. I like that someone brought up triggers. I have triggers, too - anything that's salt + fat, like tortilla chips, salted nuts, or microwave popcorn. Even the "healthy" versions totally set me off (like baked chips, low fat popcorn) - I can't stop eating them if I start. An exception for me is raw nuts... I'm okay with just an ounce or small handful of almonds, but not if they're salted. Only if they're raw and plain.

    Imo, that means I have a food addiction, so I treat it like I would if it were any other kind of addiction... abstinence. I stay away from that stuff, because I know if I have just a handful of tortilla chips, I'll just keep mindlessly munching the whole bag, and I won't care until later on.

    Fwiw, there are some great and very friendly books on food addiction. It's not the end of the world, and I'm betting a lot of people on this site struggle with it, and don't know that it falls into that category. For me, once I understood it as such, it got easier.

    Where I really get challenged is socializing. If I'm at a party or a potluck, and someone has brought tortilla chips - even with a healthy dip like hummus... I have a really tough time. Again, I feel like it really is an addiction. I can only imagine what it's like for an alcoholic to be at a party where people are drinking. I feel the same way at a party where people are eating party snacks. So, I usually decline parties, or if I go, I just stay a short time, have some club soda, maybe some raw veggies if there are some, and leave before I weaken.

    I wish there were a better way... meaning I wish I didn't have this issue.

    The only time when it's more or less okay is when I'm already at my target weight/fitness level, and I'm working out like crazy. Then I don't have to worry so much about what I eat, because I'm burning so many calories. And by working out a lot, I'm talking the equivalent of running 30-40 miles a week. Then if I go to a party and indulge in chips once a month, or make popcorn on a video night once a month, my fitness level/habits can take it in stride. But the word "habits" is key there... I can only splurge on that stuff rarely - like a couple of times a month. And for the most part, I'm really better off just saying "no."

    So, here's to getting back into that kind of shape, and *staying* in that kind of shape.
  • laurenebargar
    laurenebargar Posts: 3,081 Member
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    Im with the plan for it and allow the food you love into you diet. Every few weeks i'll go to our grocery store, and grab some food from the hot ready to go food on my lunch break. I love love love mozzarella sticks and pizza logs, I limit my intake by literally grabbing one of each and then getting a salad, By the time I get back to the office to eat it, I have one of each thing, then eat my salad and I feel satisfied, its still like 400 calories but I dont feel deprived and I can fit it into my day every once in awhile.
  • 88olds
    88olds Posts: 4,463 Member
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    Urges v cravings.

    I start everyday with a plan, but for instance, say I go to work and there are donuts. I wasn't planning on a donut but there it is. Now I want one, a substantial indulgence. That's an urge. I resist urges. I'm not letting someone else's actions derail my program. I've become the office germaphobe. I don't eat stuff that's just sitting out. No donut.

    But now it's the next day. Remember those donuts? they sure looked good. Glad there aren't any today.

    Then the next day. You know what might be good? A donut. Now we are talking craving. Only way to satisfy a craving is to get it. So I work a donut into my plan. Maybe I buy a donut and throw half in the trash. Worth a try.
  • sunfastrose
    sunfastrose Posts: 543 Member
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    It doesn't have to be a permanent no, just a no for right now. Plan for the foods you really want and eat them when you want to, not just because they are there.
  • JeromeBarry1
    JeromeBarry1 Posts: 10,182 Member
    edited June 2017
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    The only thing I've found I can't have in small portions is pecan pie. It's a pity, too, as that's my very favorite.

    Other sorts of pies, cakes, candies, etc in my home are no more or less 'tempting' than goldfish or saltine crackers. I can eat too much of anything but often manage to not do so.
  • ValkyrieOnline
    ValkyrieOnline Posts: 160 Member
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    I love mozzarella cheese. I could eat over 3 balls a day of it, the size of baseballs! I have to remember that I will eat it again, but not right now. Moderation is a good one, too! I still have Hershey's and Twix [calorie proportioned] bars that have been sitting there for days, seriously surprised I still do!
    I also like to try to get in some walking if I can, just to give me some free space if I ever want a piece of something I am craving :]!
  • Lizzy622
    Lizzy622 Posts: 3,705 Member
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    I had to stop eating potato chips completely when I first started because once I started I did not stop. Other foods like chocolate, I learned to eat in small portions of very good quality. After about 2 years I was able to have a few chips and stop. It's amazing what we can accomplish when we put our minds to it.

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