please help me im hopeless :(

ReadyForWeightLoss · June 2017

ive been gaining weight like crazy i just keep gaining and gaining. im up to 303lbs and im so scared to get bigger... im literally crying right now! i try to watch what i eat but its so hard i give up so easily. idk what to do anymore i started to go for daily walks for a month now and havent lost a single pound

i eat so badly that wallking doesnt even help. in 7 years i went from 160 to 303

LisaMoxon155 · June 2017

Hello. Welcome to MFP.
Well u have done the first step of regonsing your weight issues.
Although walking is a great way to help lose weigjt,the reason your not losing then is because your eating more than your burning off.
Its a bout calories in to calories out.
Keep a log of what you eat and how.mucb. buy a set of scakes if need be. And change something little every day ,every week.
Even when you lose a pound it will give u boost to carry on.
Ive sent u a freind request.
Dont give up. Be dertermed.
Abd u will succeed.
Good luck

spazeppi · June 2017

If you would like to buddy up and be accountable to each other then that could help. I hear your pain and I understand it. I'm logging everything BEFORE it gets in my mouth. It really helps motivate me. And planning ahead for the next day as much as possible. It is difficult, I live rural and have a family so am super busy, but we can do this!

Derf_Smeggle · June 2017

ReadyForWeightLoss wrote: »

i eat so badly that wallking doesnt even help.

So the really cool thing is that you recognize the problem. Fixing it is simple, but it isn't easy. There are some really excellent Stickies in the Getting Started forum, and that is a really great place to start.

Remember that it took 7 years for you to get where you are now. It didn't occur overnight so don't try to fix it overnight. Start slow. Change 1 thing each week, or every 2 weeks, or whatever is comfortable.

A couple things that work for me:
1. Food scale - it just doesn't get more accurate.
2. Log everything - boy, howdy! Those little calories you think don't matter add up quickly.
3. There are items that I have a hard time controlling my intake of. Soda is a biggie for me, so I don't have it in the house.
4. Fats and proteins for breakfast. Helps me feel full longer, and avoids the mid morning "crash".
5. Log everything!
6. Playing around with number of times I eat to find what helps me the most. Personally, I'm a 5-6 small meals/snacks everyday.

There are other great methods. You have to find what works for you.

rheddmobile · June 2017

You're not alone, a lot of people here have been where you are now. You can take charge of your life and turn things around. You've done the most important part by deciding you want to change.

Have you been to a doctor? It's a good place to start when you want to make big changes. The doctor can check your thyroid and other blood work to make sure there's nothing medical contributing to your weight gain. It's not necessary but it can help.

There are as many different ways to successfully lose weight as there are people and you just need to find the one that works for you. What I suggest is that for one week, you don't do anything different, just eat and behave normally except log everything you eat. Then you can take a good look at where you are right now and figure out what you want to change. For example, are there places or times or situations which lead you to overeat, or to eat fattening food? Are there some nutritious foods you aren't eating which you could add to your diet?

Please keep posting here, people here love to help others, but you have to stick around.

cleoallen2 · June 2017

Lots of good suggestion here. The best thing you can do is to never give up. We are all with you.

aeshippers · June 2017

I second what @rheddmobile said.

Don't try and change anything major to start with and don't try and cut your calories dramatically straight off. I started at a little over maintenance for me and cut daily intake by 50 calories no more often than once a week and only when I felt ready until I was losing at a rate I'm happy with. By doing this I have lost an average of almost 1 pound a week since I started in January (and I lost nothing for the first 2-3 weeks).
View this as a lifestyle change so try and only make changes you think you can sustain in the long term and use the community and make friends on mfp, I think that is the biggest single change I made this time that has made the difference.

Good luck, you can do this

NettieBess · June 2017

cleoallen2 wrote: »

Lots of good suggestion here. The best thing you can do is to never give up. We are all with you.

100% agree. Never give up. But be kind to yourself. I think you know that you got you where you are now. That's in the past. Forgive yourself and move on. If you dislike or even hate yourself for getting fat you won't feel as though you deserve better, and I'm sure you do deserve to live healthily.

I've only just started this myself at 287 lbs. I keep making bad choices but I keep going. I wish you well. Add me if you want to.

batters1964 · June 2017

I could have written your post a few months ago. I was just over 300 lbs. I have lost 40 lbs since New Year, so still very near the start of my new healthier life choices journey.

Things that have helped me - take it one day, one meal even at a time. No food is off limits - but if I carry on eating one bag of crisps a day for instance I have to take the consequences of that choice.

Walking is fabulous. Stress busting, good for fitness and practical.

Log all food you eat. I do this at the beginning of each day so I have my menu sorted.

But for me, the most important thing was getting into the right mindset. You may not be there yet, and you may want to talk to your doctor as well before you start.

Good luck

dejavuohlala · June 2017

ReadyForWeightLoss wrote: »

ive been gaining weight like crazy i just keep gaining and gaining. im up to 303lbs and im so scared to get bigger... im literally crying right now! i try to watch what i eat but its so hard i give up so easily. idk what to do anymore i started to go for daily walks for a month now and havent lost a single pound i eat so badly that wallking doesnt even help. in 7 years i went from 160 to 303

Add some of us as friends so we can support you on a note personal level, you can do this with support, good luck

snickerscharlie · June 2017

When I started, first thing I did was buy a food scale after reading the forums here.

Then I spent the first two weeks simply getting used to accurately logging all of my food and drinks here on MFP without making any changes to what I was actually consuming.

Those two weeks gave me a wonderful baseline of information from which to begin making changes. It was a real eye-opener to honestly look at the caloric cost of everything I was consuming.

I then started to make small changes - ones that I knew I could live with. Those started added up in a positive way, which encouraged me to make other changes. As the weight started coming off, I added more activity to my day in the form of walking. When I started, I could barely lap the couch.

After a few weeks I could walk around the block. Then I could walk around two blocks. Then three.

I can honestly say I never had to cut out any of the foods I love while I lost the weight I needed to. I just ate way less of them. This works for some people but not for others. Some find it best to eliminate trigger foods from their environment entirely until such time as they feel they can reintroduce them without bingeing on them.

Start slow. Every small step you make is a step forward.

Heather4448 · June 2017

Welcome. You'll find very helpful and honest advice here. I can't add anything meaningful to what has already been said by the others. I'll just reiterate: One day at a time. We all mess up from time to time. Don't expect perfection. Small changes over time=lasting results.

namelesshere · June 2017

First, you are not hopeless. Take a step back and decide if today is the day you start your weight loss journey. Next forget about the scale you step on. It is very fickle and the daily fluctuations are enough to get anyone discouraged. Now, if you have not yet done so, purchase a good quality digital food scale. Learn to use it and weigh everything that goes in your mouth. It might take a while to get used to manufacturers portion sizes vs "your" portion sizes but trust me on this. You do not need 2 cups of cereal for breakfast. (What I was eating before I started.) Next, come her to your account daily and log your food faithfully, even if you go over. This will help you see where you need to make changes. Continue the walking. Greatest way for exercise. If you don't have a dog, borrow one from the animal shelter to walk. More motivation to keep it up and doing a good deed at the same time. You can do this, you are so worth doing this for yourself! You are not hopeless. Any day I come here and log my intake faithfully is one day closer to my goal.

HealthyGoalie · June 2017

When using a scale with body fat measurement, be aware that hydration.. has influence on the reading. If weighing after a hot summer night, it can display a body fat higher than normally cause being dehydrated or if not drinked enough water the day before. While being more hydrated can display a lower body fat number..

Using a guidance to keep making the best decisions food wise. Looking at the trend over time, not the daily number in itself.

JeromeBarry1 · June 2017

The math of going from 160 to 303 in 6 years indicates that you have averaged a daily calorie surplus of about 230 calories. That's not hopeless.

Use this site to log your food. Just log all of it and be accurate. You'll figure it out.

Testimony: I weighed well in excess of 300 lb before I tried to actually change something about the way I was gaining 20 lb per year. When I stopped my daily drive-through burger consumption and my daily C-store Doritos and donuts consumption, I lost about 100 lb in a year without any exercise at all.

BD_1960 · June 2017

Hi....I've been exactly where you are right now. It's ahot

I finally started losing weight by SETTING MY CALORIE GOAL and STAYING UNDER IT.

I started logging every piece of food that goes in my mouth. Everything. This allowed me to see why I was still gaining weight. I'm now down 12 lbs, and if I can do it, you can too!

I SET my calorie goal and I literally fight my food cravings and stay under that number One day at a time.....

It's not easy, but it can be done. It's a battle, and only you decide can make the (daily ) decision to win it.

Wishing you strength.

fitandfabwithbecky · June 2017

@ReadyForWeightLoss Hey!

I sent you a friend request this morning!!

ElvisPedro · June 2017

Hi, I was 17 stone a few weeks ago (about 238 lbs, I think). I've lost 6lbs doing slim fast but quickly realised you can swap the slim fast and meal replacement bars for something more filling with the same amount of calories. I got some digital kitchen scales, a calculator (or even pen and paper) and a cheap pedometer. I try to stick to my mfp diary and do 10k steps every day. For the days I really don't feel like precisely counting calories I have a stock of low calorie ready meals in the freezer (just don't mop them up with multiple bread and butters like I used to, lol). Good luck x

bluets2011 · June 2017

I really liked all what the previous posters have written. I'd say stop thinking of yourself as hopeless. You're strong. You came here and was brave enough to ask for help. This is huge. Now breathe and read what people have written about their own experience. We can learn from others, but end of the day your experience is going to be as unique as you are. There will be hiccups, mistakes, bad choices, but this is a learning curve. Keep the big picture in your mind all the time. That's where you want to live: in the big picture. It's worth it. You are worth it.

Tried30UserNames · June 2017

You're no more hopeless than the rest of us are, which is to say, not hopeless at all. You've already started by coming here. Put your information into MFP and find out how many calories it tells you to eat. Don't make your goal too aggressive at first or you may want to give up before you begin. If you're really feeling you can't even start this, tell it you want to lose .5 lbs a week. If you're feeling more motivated, tell it 1 lb or 1.5 lbs. It'll probably give you something around 2000ish calories a day to eat. You can make a really nice meal plan out of that.

Then sit down and figure out what you have been eating. Figure out approximately how many calories those foods and portion sizes have. If you've been eating those foods, I'm going to assume those are the foods you like. So use that same basic plan (with smaller portions) to create your new, calorie controlled menu. Then, make some changes over the weeks and months. Swap in some more vegetables and fruit and swap out some foods that aren't as nutritionally sound.

As others said, buy a digital food scale and weigh your food. That egg that the carton says is 50 grams? Mine are closer to 55-60 grams. The slice of bread that is supposed to be 23 grams...it's probably closer to 32 grams. The half cup of dry oatmeal you carefully measured out? It's probably 20% bigger in grams than the 1/2 cup serving size on the box label. The ounce of cheese you eyeballed? It's probably only half an ounce and you can eat more.

Just take it one day, one meal at a time. Plan ahead. Go to the grocery store and make sure you have healthy and convenient choices available. If your house is full of foods that tempt you to overeat or binge, get rid of them. Don't make too many and too drastic changes at once. Don't deprive yourself too much. Keep up the daily walks.

suhashmi · June 2017

Find your favourite old dress that you can't fit into now or buy one with a size you want to fit into and keep trying it on before each weighing every week. Think about fitting in it when you have any craving. I do that. Really helps. It has helped me before and believe me when you can one day you will feel so happy just remember that. This is positive approach . Another way is tough love . Remember every mean thing anyone has ever said about your weight when you have food craving and don't eat it because you want to prove those jerks wrong and show them that you can lose that weight and look stunning and gorgeous .Both of these methods have worked for me in the past and even now. Take care please add me as I'm looking for weight loss buddies

ninerbuff · June 2017

ReadyForWeightLoss wrote: »

ive been gaining weight like crazy i just keep gaining and gaining. im up to 303lbs and im so scared to get bigger... im literally crying right now! i try to watch what i eat but its so hard i give up so easily. idk what to do anymore i started to go for daily walks for a month now and havent lost a single pound i eat so badly that wallking doesnt even help. in 7 years i went from 160 to 303

Go see a professional. The habitual eating may be compensating for a problem you haven't addressed.

As for eating, it's up to YOU to get it under control. Stay out of the kitchen as much as possible. Trust when I tell you that if you don't start handling it now, it's going to be a really life threatening issue soon.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

ReadyForWeightLoss · June 2017

Thank you all for your kind and motivating words. I will definitly keep all your advice in mind. You guys are amazong ppl , I hope you all achieve your goals

ksz1104 · June 2017

ReadyForWeightLoss wrote: »

ive been gaining weight like crazy i just keep gaining and gaining. im up to 303lbs and im so scared to get bigger... im literally crying right now! i try to watch what i eat but its so hard i give up so easily. idk what to do anymore i started to go for daily walks for a month now and havent lost a single pound i eat so badly that wallking doesnt even help. in 7 years i went from 160 to 303

Please remember that once you do start to change, you won't see results right away. Some of us started out and worked out for a week and got discouraged. It takes much longer than that to see progress and results. Take one day at a time. Don't beat yourself up if you need a break but get back up and dust yourself off and keep going. You can do this.

Moici · June 2017

I'm in the same boat and I've just recently begun my weight loss journey.
An easy first step for me was choosing to not drink my sugar. I'm a sugar addict but I found I didn't mind giving up sweetened drinks.
And like everyone says, log EVERYTHING you consume!

everher · June 2017

Tons of good advice and I'll add a bit more.

1. You can do this. We all started somewhere and many of us started where you are now. Just take a deep breath and start.

2. Something that helps me that hasn't been mentioned - preplan what you are going to eat and prelog if you have to. It's much harder for me to wake up and try to figure out what to eat versus already having decided on Sunday all week I'm going to have x for breakfast and so forth. It makes life easier and takes some of the stress out of decided what to eat.

3. Don't go too extreme at first. Baby steps. I would log everything I eat accurately and honestly for two weeks or so first and then go about trying to reduce your calories to MFP's recommended calories for your rate of loss. This also gives you information and you can see where and how you can change things.

4. Just take it a day at a time. Sometimes we all have bad days, but thankfully one day can't ruin weeks of effort.

CynthiasChoice · June 2017

All great advice here! I have one more thing to add - something my doctor advised when I confessed to him that I felt frustrated by my lack of willpower.

My doctor said, "Begin your day with at least 25 grams of protein. It will set you up for success the rest of the day. Make sure you get at least 25 grams of protein at every meal. You will be less likely to overeat if you're getting adequate protein." (Your protein requirements will be different, of course.) This advice literally changed my life. With higher protein and lower carbs in my diet, my impulse control with food improved dramatically.

Just the act of confessing my weakness to my doctor had a transformative affect on me. It was a humbling experience, and forced me to face the fact that I could not avoid the challenge of weight loss any more. I avoided seeing him for so long because I couldn't bear the idea of his disapproval and the shame I knew I would feel when I stepped on his scale. Once I finally did go and see him - I won't lie - it was as bad as I had imagined it would be! But it was exactly what I needed, and he was kind and encouraging and helped in a practical way by instructing me to eat more protein and fewer carbs.

If you're avoiding your doctor as I was, I hope you will feel encouraged to plan a visit. Best wishes to you!

daciamatthew · June 2017

So much great advice here! I just want to encourage you to keep on going. Weight loss always has it's ups and downs, but if you keep on going in the right direction you'll eventually get there.

mlinci · June 2017

snickerscharlie wrote: »

When I started, first thing I did was buy a food scale after reading the forums here.

Then I spent the first two weeks simply getting used to accurately logging all of my food and drinks here on MFP without making any changes to what I was actually consuming.

Those two weeks gave me a wonderful baseline of information from which to begin making changes. It was a real eye-opener to honestly look at the caloric cost of everything I was consuming.

I then started to make small changes - ones that I knew I could live with. Those started added up in a positive way, which encouraged me to make other changes. As the weight started coming off, I added more activity to my day in the form of walking. When I started, I could barely lap the couch. After a few weeks I could walk around the block. Then I could walk around two blocks. Then three.

I can honestly say I never had to cut out any of the foods I love while I lost the weight I needed to. I just ate way less of them. This works for some people but not for others. Some find it best to eliminate trigger foods from their environment entirely until such time as they feel they can reintroduce them without bingeing on them.

Start slow. Every small step you make is a step forward.

This. Best advice and I'd say the only advice most people need. I wish it was printed as a leaflet and handed out to every individual who ever tried to lose weight.

rach__b · June 2017

First things first.... Don't panic! You sound extremely anxious. A little bit of stress is good as it motivates you to make changes. But if you keep over stressing it's extremely detrimental and gets you into a hopeless thinking mode. It's like 'learned helplessness'

Congratulate yourself on being brave and admitting you're not happy in your current situation. Use this anxiety and channel it into making positive life changes. I love the quote 'do something today that your future self will thank you for'

Make a long term goal, but make small daily ones too. For instance keep up your walking. Go to new places, make it more exciting. And start logging your calorie intake everyday.

For me, I love the mentality of fitness. It's extremely positive and encouraging. It's all about setting goals and smashing them! This will in turn give you more confidence and will give you more momentum. You'll be unstoppable!

I'm not overweight. However, I do suffer with extremely bad depression/anxiety and exercise helps tremendously. It's increased my mood and given me more self esteem when I realise I do have the power and control to achieve my goals.

More importantly though, Don't give up and have patience. Envision yourself with the body you want and think about it everyday, make it an imprint in your mind. Think of how healthier and happier you'll be and take small steps to achieve it. Don't lose sight of it.

I wish you all the luck in the world

hoffman2300 · June 2017

So many wise responses so far - I'm not sure I can add much other than support (and I'll add you as a friend). There were a few people who mentioned logging what you're eating before even making changes so you have a sense of where you are calorie-wise now - that's so smart (and I wish I'd started doing that!). You can do this!

please help me im hopeless :(

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