So I'm huge now

Hey....I'm new here and looking for some support... I am not new to the world of eating clean and exercising but having done it before, put back on all the weight and more... That self worth is at an all time low.

I am a bridal stylist and I make a living making women feel good about themselves. I do not value myself enough to eat well, exercise, work on a balance in my crazy life... I put all my time and energy into my clients and at the end of the day gets none left for me and I laze on the couch or in bed... Food calms my emotions and anxieties.... The pressure of being a sought after stylist where everyone wants something from you and you have to no on social media day in and day out non stop to maintain your relevance.... The anxiety is just building day in and day out... I don't manage my stress or anxiety at all , I just eat or shut down... My weight is exponentially increasing with every burger I eat instead of something nutritious.

About 4 years ago I felt as I do now... And I decided to change... I worked with a very fit friend who coached me daily on food choices, exercise, checking in with her everyday... Over about 5 months I lost 65lbs and felt amazing, looked amazing and everything was amazing... Problem is that to do this I didn't take a single client in that time and it allowed me to focus my caring energy on myself and not others. As soon as clients started back up again the weight came with it.

I need to learn to love myself first and not to put everything and everyone else's happiness ahead of my own health and happiness. I need to stop paying others and please myself. I need to make myself a priority but having failed before is really hard to feel like it's wortg trying again.

So im trying this... Has anyone experienced anything similar? Any advice?

Much love,

Kesar