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momofamadhouse
momofamadhouse Posts: 197 Member
edited June 2017 in Health and Weight Loss
Hey you guys. I'm 5'7.5" and 165. I've lost a pretty significant chunk (112 pounds) in the last 18 months. I'm still about 20 pounds from my "goal" weight and just still just slightly above a healthy BMI. The last few months my progress has slowed to a bumpy crawl due mostly to my losing focus in consistently logging and exercising. I've done mostly cardio (running, spinning, Zumba etc), but I also do kettlebell workouts 2-3 times a week and yoga almost daily.
I feel...disillusioned (?) with my body/results. It feels like I'm wearing a skin suit too big for that I can't take off. And the fat deposits that remain are much more noticeable and irritate me far more than when I was pushing 300 pounds. Not to mention it feels like there's so much room in the 'skin suit' that the fat just flops all over the place instead of just staying put. My next fitness assessment is in two weeks, so I'll find out more about my BF% then. I'm just kind of stuck in my head. Should I stay in a deficit to lose the last 20 or 30 pounds of fat? Do I need to start thinking about recomp now? How do I come to terms with the skin suit? It's hard to admit how discouraged I am because I'm proud of the progress I've made and I knew going in that being morbidly obese for over a decade (and four pregnancies) would take it's toll on my skin, I always expected the sag but I didn't realize how much it would frustrate me when I got to this point.
These mental hurdles are absolutely stalling my progress. I've always been a stress eater and it's a battle I have fought every step of the way on this journey. For about two months I completely ignored trying to lose and by sheer luck I maintained a steady weight during that time, can't take credit for it at all.
If anyone has any insight or advice, please advise me. I hope I've articulated the issues I'm having clearly, but my state of mind is confusing to me so I wouldn't be surprise if none of what I've said makes sense.
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Replies

  • msdemeanor70
    msdemeanor70 Posts: 66 Member
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    Congratulations on what you've done so far! That is awesome. I'm 5'3". Though I've only lost 50 pounds, I also started seeing sagging skin - arms, very upper thighs and middle back. So, I decided to stop losing once I hit 135. My maintenance is 135-140. For ME personally, I would rather hold onto the extra 15-20 pounds and minimize the loose skin. Am I always thrilled? No, but when I am having a body image struggle, it is typically the loose skin that I'm cursing not the extra weight. I've been working on toning and whatnot which has made a difference over the last two years, but you can only do so much. Who knows, maybe down the road, I'll try and drop a few more pounds, but for now, it's weight over sag for me.
  • Seffell
    Seffell Posts: 2,222 Member
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    Nice loss!

    About the disillusionment - I'm your height and my starting weight was 166lbs in Feb 2016. I looked almost the same as you, i.e. you just have lots more to lose. I'm 136lbs now and need to lose 10lbs more to get to my original weight from 4 years ago.

    Just keep losing and do as much lifting as you can (up to the optimal amount of course).
  • snickerscharlie
    snickerscharlie Posts: 8,578 Member
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    The belly and thighs are, for most people, the first place that excess weight appears and last place the weight comes off. You've come a long way in your marathon. You'll soon cross the finish line. Take a mental break and then carry on.

    How much saggy skin you'll be left with at the end is a product of time and genetics. But even if it's never perfect, think instead of how much you've improved your health and longevity by accomplishing what you have. :)
  • momofamadhouse
    momofamadhouse Posts: 197 Member
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    Thank you all for the replies and encouragement. When you start off so heavy it takes a while to actually see a change (the first time I really saw one was after I had hit -40#) and at this point, I don't have nearly as much left to lose so it's hard to see how 20 more would make much difference. I'll probably change my goals from -2# a week to .5 or 1 and get used to expecting slower results.
    Thanks for the reminder about lifting. I'm downloading SL to start this week and maybe focusing on building strength and maintaining muscle mass will distract me and get me out of my head for a while.
    Even if my skin doesn't bounce back I'm sure it's something I'll eventually accept. I'll definitely take being healthy with looser skin over not being able to catch my kids when they take off running
  • gothchiq
    gothchiq Posts: 4,598 Member
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    Loose skin is a thing. I hate mine too.... I know that whatever is going to tighten up will do so in 2 years (according to my doctor) and whatever is left at that point we are stuck with. The older you are in general the less it snaps back. I pick workout clothes that keep that stuff under wraps to prevent chafing and other annoyances. Like capri yoga pants rather than shorts, and short sleeved rather than sleeveless tops. Much less annoying when your clothes hold onto it for you IMHO.
  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,268 Member
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    momofamadhouse wrote: »
    Thank you all for the replies and encouragement. When you start off so heavy it takes a while to actually see a change (the first time I really saw one was after I had hit -40#) and at this point, I don't have nearly as much left to lose so it's hard to see how 20 more would make much difference. I'll probably change my goals from -2# a week to .5 or 1 and get used to expecting slower results.
    Thanks for the reminder about lifting. I'm downloading SL to start this week and maybe focusing on building strength and maintaining muscle mass will distract me and get me out of my head for a while.
    Even if my skin doesn't bounce back I'm sure it's something I'll eventually accept. I'll definitely take being healthy with looser skin over not being able to catch my kids when they take off running

    to give some perspective on what 20lbs will do.

    At 165 (almost same height as you) I was in a size 10. 15lbs less...size 6...5lbs more size 4.

    I can look at myself in the mirror and gauge what I weigh based on a small part of my belly...if there is "hang" or if htere is skin drape.
  • Seffell
    Seffell Posts: 2,222 Member
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    momofamadhouse wrote: »
    I'll probably change my goals from -2# a week to .5 or 1 and get used to expecting slower results.

    Yes definitely reduce it from 2lbs. 1lbs seems appropriate. I've lost my 30lbs mostly at 0.75lbs/week. It takes a while but it's a gradual transition into maintanance itself because you'll be eating almost the same calories as for maintanance.
  • carterbrent
    carterbrent Posts: 91 Member
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    I swear by wearing shapewear... I am about 60 to 70 pounds overweight. I will probably get a tummy tuck once I lose the weight. But I think you look great. What ever you do, don't give up!
  • everher
    everher Posts: 909 Member
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    You look amazing!!! And congratulations on your weight loss! You are nearly half the person you were before.

    Now as to your concerns I agree with everyone that losing the rest of the weight you want to lose as well as strength training will make a difference. Skin does tighten up some even after the losing process is done so it may tighten up a bit more.

    I'm 32 lbs from my goal, 17 lbs from a healthy BMI, and I feel like I can see a difference in the areas that were bothering me everyday. I also started doing some strength training which I believe is helping.
  • lynn_glenmont
    lynn_glenmont Posts: 9,988 Member
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    momofamadhouse wrote: »
    Thank you all for the replies and encouragement. When you start off so heavy it takes a while to actually see a change (the first time I really saw one was after I had hit -40#) and at this point, I don't have nearly as much left to lose so it's hard to see how 20 more would make much difference. I'll probably change my goals from -2# a week to .5 or 1 and get used to expecting slower results.
    Thanks for the reminder about lifting. I'm downloading SL to start this week and maybe focusing on building strength and maintaining muscle mass will distract me and get me out of my head for a while.
    Even if my skin doesn't bounce back I'm sure it's something I'll eventually accept. I'll definitely take being healthy with looser skin over not being able to catch my kids when they take off running

    At your start weight ("pushing 300"), 40 lbs was about 13% of your weight. At your current weight (165 lbs), 20 lbs is about 12% of your weight. I would expect the next 20 lbs to be as noticeable as the first 40. Also, we're not always the best judges of our own size and shape. The fact that you feel worse about the way you look now is evidence of that.
  • Goober1142
    Goober1142 Posts: 219 Member
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    You look fantastic! Great job, cut yourself a break.
  • ILoveGingerNut
    ILoveGingerNut Posts: 367 Member
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    I think you look great
  • Sara2652
    Sara2652 Posts: 158 Member
    edited June 2017
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    Wow, you're results from the pictures look great! Congrats!

    About taking a break, I was reading somewhere about it and how it can be really helpful. Maybe take a little break -2 weeks/months- to just maintain. I think its good to keep tracking and doing things that you need to do to maintain but just taking a break from the intensity you'd need to lose. I also wonder if taking a break allows your body some extra energy to 'repair' the skin.

    If once you do get to your comfortable/livable weight and the skin is still an issue get surgery. Start talking to your doctor now about it if you are experiencing chaffing, discomfort or infections in the folds so that when/if you choose surgery you will have something to show the insurance company.

    I started at 230lbs with the goal of losing around 100 total but I plan on taking 2 months off when I get to 180lbs and then again at 145lbs. At 145lbs I will assess what would be a livable and comfortable body to see if I even want to go lower. I will likely need surgery as my breast have always given me trouble from their size to saggy-ness, they appeared over night and immediately headed south. Also my stomach flap has folded over and the lack of breathability is uncomfortable so imagine it will not get much better with weight loss.

    Keep up the good work and know that what you have accomplished so far is great.
  • MJ2victory
    MJ2victory Posts: 97 Member
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    I am worried about your focus on the way you look. Have you entered therapy? Losing that much weight has huge mental implications and without a trained professional, you may run into trouble. For what it's worth, your body is beautiful. It saddens me you can't see that. I really think you should look for a therapist who can guide you through accepting your new size and learning to love the new you.
  • try2again
    try2again Posts: 3,562 Member
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    Also, as to your dieting issues, another great thread you might want to read:

    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10481830/the-diet-break/p1

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