Losing everything
Noamsh
Posts: 79 Member
In the past few weeks my life completely changed. Well, fell apart.
First, I lost my job.
A couple of weeks later the guy I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with, ended our relationship.
Since we lived together, I had to move back in with my parents, single and unemployed on the week I turned 27.
Now I realize that I've gained over 20 lbs in the past 2 years, after maintaining for a very long time. I wasn't blind to my weight gain, but I was in love and happy and didn't really care.
But now, when I lost pretty much everything, I feel like I also lost myself. I lack motivation to start back up again and feel that it's pointless since no matter how much I try, it's impossible for me to be successful at anything. I always fail and I am never good enough for anything.
How do I pick myself up when I feel like I lost everything I had?
First, I lost my job.
A couple of weeks later the guy I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with, ended our relationship.
Since we lived together, I had to move back in with my parents, single and unemployed on the week I turned 27.
Now I realize that I've gained over 20 lbs in the past 2 years, after maintaining for a very long time. I wasn't blind to my weight gain, but I was in love and happy and didn't really care.
But now, when I lost pretty much everything, I feel like I also lost myself. I lack motivation to start back up again and feel that it's pointless since no matter how much I try, it's impossible for me to be successful at anything. I always fail and I am never good enough for anything.
How do I pick myself up when I feel like I lost everything I had?
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Replies
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It's really hard to lose weight or even care when you're going through so many difficult changes. I'd just start walking or exercising daily. Even a small amount. I'd aim to maintain and log everything. After a few weeks, if you want to lose, change the setting. Sometimes we just need to take the smallest of first steps. A walk around the block every day would count. And log all of your food. I'm sorry about your job and boyfriend. Wow. That's so difficult, but both together....2
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I was in a similar position in 2010. Jobless, homeless, 50 pounds overweight, newly divorced, and raising two kids with no support. I ended up moving in with my parents until I got back on my feet.
The thing about having nothing is that you have the potential for greatness. You have the chance to find a great career. You have the chance to really figure out yourself. You also have the chance to build a smoking hot body. Start by figuring out what you like to do for exercise and go from there. Go make active friends and see where life takes you.6 -
I was in a similar position when I started losing weight. I lost my job, was totally broke, and super stressed out and sad.
What got me started on losing weight was that it was one thing I could control 100%, and that I could control RIGHT NOW, not in a month or down the road.
So you might be single, sad, and living with your parents, but none of that can stop you from getting up and losing weight One step at a time. You can do it.4 -
Everything happens for a reason. Time to take care of you!1
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It's hard to know where to start when everything's fallen apart all together. You don't have to fix everything at once. Give yourself a little time to sort everythign out, but start somewhere: helping your parents out around the house, getting into an old fitness routine, reconnecting with people you may have lost touch with while in your relationship, taking a risk and applying to jobs that look fun as well as practical. Whatever you need to do to get out of the rut, it'll come in time.2
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I wish I could say it gets better but my life is just as *kitten*1
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In the past few weeks my life completely changed. Well, fell apart.
First, I lost my job.
A couple of weeks later the guy I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with, ended our relationship.
Since we lived together, I had to move back in with my parents, single and unemployed on the week I turned 27.
Now I realize that I've gained over 20 lbs in the past 2 years, after maintaining for a very long time. I wasn't blind to my weight gain, but I was in love and happy and didn't really care.
But now, when I lost pretty much everything, I feel like I also lost myself. I lack motivation to start back up again and feel that it's pointless since no matter how much I try, it's impossible for me to be successful at anything. I always fail and I am never good enough for anything.
How do I pick myself up when I feel like I lost everything I had?
So sorry you are going through all these things at the same time. Your depressed feelings seem normal to me. These big setbacks won't be permanent. Thousands of people go through the same thing. You can heal, too.
It might not seem this way right now, but it's better not to marry someone if things aren't right than to get married and then go through a divorce. I hope you find your true soulmate.
As far as a new job, while you are looking you might volunteer somewhere once a week. It will lift your spirits and you can also put it on your resume.
Find an exercise you enjoy and try to stick with it. Sign up for a class if you can't motivate yourself.
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It all happens for a reason! You can do this!!!1
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You have loving, caring parents. You're very lucky. Spend time actually building an adult friendship with your parents.
You may feel depressed, but you have a lot to be grateful for. I mean this in the best way- I'm not diminishing the sadness you feel.
You're not a failure. Things will get better, I promise.2 -
Thank you everyone.
Even though my life is a mess right now, I don't really have a choice but to start putting things back together and I have to start somewhere.
So today I did my first workout in months and logged food for the first time in probably over 2 years. I worked way too hard to get to where I was fitness wise to just throw it all away. At least I haven't gained all of the weight I originally lost. I guess this is pretty much the only thing I have somewhat control over at the moment.6
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