People Telling you to Stop Losing Already
kksmom1789
Posts: 281 Member
my younger sister has always been smaller then me in weight we are about the same height she is 4ft 11in and I am 5ft even I have been over weight for as long as she can remember I am now down into the 140's and she has been gaining as is now in the 150's the last few times I have seen her she is constantly telling me that I am not going to lose anymore pounds I am as skinny as my body is going to allow and I need to just start toning I just got into the overweight section on the bmi chart my goal is only 125lbs which is the high end of the chart for normal. is she correct or is she just jealous and trying to make me not lose anymore weight?
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Drop some pics2
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She's jealous, don't let her stop you from reaching your goals.10
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At some point it won't really be about the scale - it'll be about health and fitness. If you're getting close to your goal then you'll prob want to start some lifting to tone your muscle.
Don't get hung up on the weight... and don't get hung up on her vision for you. You got this!
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She's incorrect, but I wouldn't jump to saying she's jealous. She may just not be used to seeing you so small so to her you look thin enough already.
My SO is always going on about how thin I am. I still need to lose 15 lbs to hit the top of the normal range on the bmi chart.8 -
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I can definitely see you dropping down some more. Keep it up11
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Judging from your pics, I think you're doing fine. As others have said, it's not always about the number on the scale, but also about how you feel. If you're feeling healthy and you want to keep working for 125, that is a decision for you to make, not your sister. I agree with everher: I wouldn't jump to saying she's jealous. She may be genuinely concerned, but you're the one in your body.
As a side note, keep in mind that BMI charts are helpful, but I don't take them as gospel. I'm 5'9" with a lot of muscle. According to "the charts" my ideal weight range is 128 to 168. Several years ago I was 190 and in great shape. I don't even know if I can make it to 168 without looking sick. Stick to what makes you feel healthy!4 -
Your sister is insecure and probably a little jealous. You're doing a great job! Keep on keeping on!5
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Keep going!0
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You look fantastic!0
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I've found that the worst people to get input from are the people who know and love me most. Doesn't stop them from giving it, unfortunately, but I can always grit my teeth change the subject. That's been my experience.1
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Being used to 'before', it is probably a little jarring to see you so much smaller. People dislike change but it will be a new normal eventually.6
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If you're losing and she's gaining, I would definitely say she's jealous. Keep up the good work.
(Uh, not in making her jealous. In losing the weight you'd like to lose. )4 -
Keep it up your doing a great job0
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Keep up the good work and keep heading towards your goal....0
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Unless she sees that you're not eating enough and are going to unhealthy lengths to lose more, her comment is not based on medical fact. I wouldn't say she's necessarily jealous: but maybe she worries that your weight is a judgment of her, or maybe she worries that if you change too much your relationship with her will change. If you're close, try talking with her.6
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kksmom1789 wrote: »my younger sister has always been smaller then me in weight we are about the same height she is 4ft 11in and I am 5ft even I have been over weight for as long as she can remember I am now down into the 140's and she has been gaining as is now in the 150's the last few times I have seen her she is constantly telling me that I am not going to lose anymore pounds I am as skinny as my body is going to allow and I need to just start toning I just got into the overweight section on the bmi chart my goal is only 125lbs which is the high end of the chart for normal. is she correct or is she just jealous and trying to make me not lose anymore weight?
Why are these the only options? Can't she be wrong without having a bad motivation (jealousy)? Maybe she's so used to seeing you heavier that you look unnaturally thin to her now (this is very common). Maybe she's just picked up a lot of woo on the Internet about what people's bodies will "allow."
*Edited to fix quote formatting.4 -
You look amazing, well done!
She may be jealous, but even if she's not I've noticed that people -especially slightly heavier people- often misjudge weight. If I lost a lb every time someone told me I was "too skinny to lose" when I was a good 20lbs overweight, or estimated me to be lighter by a vast amount!
Just keep going, you will know in yourself when you have reached your goals - not to say a bit of lifting wouldn't make you look/feel even better!0 -
Yep, she is insecure, jealous, and full of *kitten*.0
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I agree with everyone else - don't listen to your sister.
I'm your same height. I started at around 155 and I'm now at 106. That's just with a calorie deficit, I haven't made any real effort at toning yet so her comment is just wrong. Your progress is amazing, so if you want to lose more, I think you absolutely can just by continuing to do what you're doing. Yes, it's harder to lose weight the more you've already lost, but that doesn't mean it's impossible, it just may be a bit of a slower process. You may have to recalculate your calorie goal because of your weight loss, but otherwise, you seem to be doing fantastic and I think you shouldn't let any negative comments dissuade you.1 -
Even my doctor wanted me to stop while I was still in the overweight BMI, and she's a rail-thin Hindu vegan. I just realized that maybe she was talking about my weight on her scale, with clothes and shoes on. That's a solid 10 lb and the weight 10 lb below is in the healthy BMI. Anyway, in your case, your sister is not trained, qualified, or credentialed to give advice. Smile and stay on track. She's your sister. Love is optimal, obedience is not necessary.0
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Brutal honesty? I'd say keep losing. Or stay as you are if you're happy with how you look, it's totally up to you, not your sister!
I am usually the last one on here to say "keep losing", because i see so many women trying to get down to or are at a really low weight for their height, and I more often than not say "STOP".
For reference, I'm 5"8 and weigh around 147. I'm in maintenance now (most of the time).0 -
Thank you everyone! I am going to continue to get to my goal weight and accomplish my goals. I have a big goal of getting into a size 7 jeans that was always my favorite size as a teenager I just felt comfortable at that size I just got into a size 12 comfortably so I have a little bit of work left to do. I am just going to let her talk and nod my head and smile all while I continue to track my calories5
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Your sister is probably misinformed, and obviously believes some myth about how a body reaches a certain weight then reaches its "set point" beyond which you cannot lose any more. Maybe she read that in Glamour magazine or something and takes it as gospel. She is simply wrong. The pictures you posted show fabulous progress! If your sister keeps insisting that she's right about this, just tell her that you two must agree to disagree and you're done talking about it.0
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Definitely just jealous!!! Sisters are the worst for that. I'm 5ft6 and I weigh 118lb; I'm still curvy - no bones showing and noone has implied I'm too skinny.
Keep doing your thing! If you're happy, then great. If you want to keep going - do!1 -
Jealous, insecure,.. you are doing great! You can definitely drop to 125.2
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I get this all the time from my coworkers I am 5'6 and 163lbs I have dropped 42 lbs total since I started in February . I am trying to get to 145, the constant criticizing is frankly just pissing me off but also keeping me motivated. It's all jealousy, do what YOU feel comfortable with no one else matters1
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I'd sit down and talk to her that you are just trying to get to a healthy weight and BMI even go to a doctor and ask their opinion, if your doctor agrees you should lose weight there's not alot she can do if you've been given medical instruction to lose weight and if she tries to argue that she knows better than a doctor tell her you don't think she's advising you for your best interests and all you want to do is be healthy. x1
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Often people have the excuses they tell themself and if you lose weight you prove your sister wrong. That she could do it but isn't. So they fight to hold onto those excuses sometimes holding others back in the process.4
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You've made amazing progress! You should be very proud. The reality is that there are other people, family or otherwise, who have benefited in some way socially from being thinner than you over time. It's very possible that there is jealousy in the mix here. "As thin as your body will let you get" isn't really a thing- if you eat in a calorie deficit, your body will burn fat. You just keep hustling toward meeting your own goals and let her know you're happy to support her in setting an pursuing goals of her own.2
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