Starting Over...and trying not to beat myself up about it

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Background: In 2013 I was the heaviest I'd ever been. 175. Yikes! From 2013-2015 I lived in the boondocks of Texas. No friends, just work and working out. I went from 175 to 145. The skinniest I'd ever been! I primarily achieved it through my vegetarian diet (and meal planning), C25K multiple times and Jillian Michaels DVDs. Then I started weight lifting and gained...about 10 pounds in muscle, but I loved it.

June 2015: Decided to go back to school in Florida. From 2015 to the end of 2016...between working two jobs and going to school, I gained ALL MY WEIGHT BACK.

Now: I'm so ashamed. I'm really down on myself about it. Got on the scale today, 173. Ugh. I'm living in North Carolina now, but I'm finding it hard to find and keep that motivation to lose all this weight again. I think because I've already done C25K and Jillian Michaels (which I'm doing again now), I don't have that same intensity that I did before because I keep comparing it to when I did this in 2013.

Just looking for some tips, support, motivation from anyone who's been in this situation and how you got out of it and achieved your goal. Thanks!

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  • JeromeBarry1
    JeromeBarry1 Posts: 10,182 Member
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    Calorie deficit to lose weight. Exercise for fitness. Log everything. Enjoy.
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,056 Member
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    So, you're up about 20 pounds? That doesn't sound like "shame" territory. Just a little fluff, right? :wink: Just start eating a little less and get some exercise. Pick up some weight and put it back down.

    It's pretty easy to go up and down 20 pounds if you aren't watching your weight pretty carefully. Consider it a lesson learned and one you won't repeat. It does require ongoing discipline, but you can do it.
  • naomiprioleau
    naomiprioleau Posts: 38 Member
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    So, you're up about 20 pounds? That doesn't sound like "shame" territory. Just a little fluff, right? :wink: Just start eating a little less and get some exercise. Pick up some weight and put it back down.

    It's pretty easy to go up and down 20 pounds if you aren't watching your weight pretty carefully. Consider it a lesson learned and one you won't repeat. It does require ongoing discipline, but you can do it.

    Lol it's shameful to me because I worked so hard to lose those 30 pounds just to gain it all back. Argh. But you're right... I need to discipline myself cuz my weight fluctuates big time!
  • CoueCoue
    CoueCoue Posts: 69 Member
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    Maybe treat yourself to a new fitness DVD that you haven't tried before. That way, you won't compare your performance to the last time you lost the weight.

    Once the weight has gone (or starts to go), pull the old DVDs back out again for a bit of variety.
  • fiddletime
    fiddletime Posts: 1,862 Member
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    I'm here for the third time for a 25 pound fluctuation. I totally get it. I'm going very slowly this time, and lost 12# then have done maintenance for a few months to get the feel for that. I'm just starting my final push down. What I've discovered, for me, is that maintenance has been eating over on vacations and holidays, then getting back in the groove in the inbetween times and not sweating the vacations. I've gone up and down in a 3# range.

    Now that I know what I think it will take for me to successfully maintain, I'm not afraid to get to goal weight. In the past I'd get to GW and stop mfp, logging, etc. since I'd "made it". Nope. It's basically all the same. I know you can do this, but take it slowly so you learn to conquer maintenance on the way.
  • wintermama13
    wintermama13 Posts: 172 Member
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    I lost about 50 pounds and was down to 145 for our wedding on 2012. Immediately got pregnant and gained it all back plus some. I made it back down to about 175 and we started trying for #2 and had a lot of issues so finally gave birth in May 2016 and now a year later have just gotten back to really focusing and trying again. Honestly you just have to want it and be able to motivate yourself everyday to keep going. Someone above mentioned switching up your workout and I agree. I went through the same thoughts as you abouy starting over.
    Feel free to add me. While I don't track a lot I log in once a day at least to keep myself going.
  • jschltn
    jschltn Posts: 7 Member
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    I'm on this site for the 1,983rd time myself. Every other time I quit and just gained more weight. I can totally empathize with you on weight gain and can understand that feeling of failure. Get yourself back up and make little changes :smile: those make a huge difference!
  • GrayRider61
    GrayRider61 Posts: 337 Member
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    What's your motivation for coming back?
  • naomiprioleau
    naomiprioleau Posts: 38 Member
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    What's your motivation for coming back?

    That's a good question. Honestly....I really miss my muscles lol I still have muscle memory but I miss the definition!
  • CMB1979
    CMB1979 Posts: 588 Member
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    I'm right there with you. I lost a little over 100 lbs and thought, "I got this. I don't have to count calories anymore." After regaining 50 lbs, I clearly have to count calories. I re-downloaded MFP, bought a new Fitbit Charge2 (I had an Ultra the first time), and got to count'n and stepp'n. You just got to keep it up, make it a habit, and never give up.
  • AliNouveau
    AliNouveau Posts: 36,287 Member
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    You did it before you can do it again. Life happens and sometimes we have to restart. No shame. You're here trying so good for you
  • ansmit4642014
    ansmit4642014 Posts: 67 Member
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    I am starting over too as I gained all 25 pounds back and an additional 20. Everyone has to start somewhere. In the grand spectrum of things it doesn't matter where you started or when, just that you made a change and got to the end.
  • greenmaria
    greenmaria Posts: 20 Member
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    I'm restarting again too. And it's the same weight I need to lose all over again. I want/need to stay motivated this time!
  • greenmaria
    greenmaria Posts: 20 Member
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    I'm restarting again too. And it's the same weight I need to lose all over again. I want/need to stay motivated this time!
  • sarahmchugh07
    sarahmchugh07 Posts: 35 Member
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    I needed this today. I've been having similar thoughts- but the truth is we are human and we are not PERFECT. Life happens. Enjoy every moment. Take one meal/activity at a time. You GOT this!! Remember we are all here for support :)
  • janiceclark08
    janiceclark08 Posts: 1,341 Member
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    After some health issues, I've gained back 14 pounds of the 55 pounds, I lost. I was still on mfp and logging, just going over on calories. If I had not continued logging, it would have been worse. Alot of my new clothes are to tight and I know I need to lose to get back into my jeans for fall. Reset my goals on mfp and just cutting back. I found when I eat all my exercise calories back is when I gain, so not going to do that anymore. I was under calorie goes yesterday and thats all it takes one day at a time. Good luck every one.
  • leopardessa
    leopardessa Posts: 17 Member
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    Don't feel ashamed! You are amazing for having lost the weight the first time around and wanting to do it again. If you did it before you can do it again. Just try not to think of 2013. Start fresh AMC stay patient. Keep thinking of those muscles you want to get back and take it a day at a time.