Why I came back to myfitnesspal

Options
Hello stranger,
If you're reading this than maybe you too lost your way on your fitness journey but have recently stumbled back into the path where you realize your health isn't going to get better but worse if you stay on the path your were on. Yep, me too. I come back to this community humbled and in need of support. Let me start at the beginning. I came from a chaotic family where meal time never really existed. Sometimes we weren't sure where our next meal was coming from. My mother was a single parent and struggled with weight herself and for as long as I can remember I recognized food as a coping mechanism. Food was a luxury and it was associated with security. Something I wanted very much. Maybe your introduction to food wasn't similar to mine but I'm willing to bet their is a high chance that you too have used food as a coping mechanism at least once in your life.

Fast forward to my 18th birthday where I weighed in at 230 lbs. I was miserable. I showed myself no compassion or empathy and only hated myself. I would look at myself with disgust and be angry that I had let myself get to that point. Once I moved out of my mother's house my relationship with food changed. My relationship with myself changed and I realized that if I wanted change I was the only one who could make it happen. Funny enough this is a lesson I often forget. I lost 60 lbs over the span of 2 years. It was a slow process but I wasn't in a rush.

You might be asking yourself why I'm back here if I'd already lost weight. Well, life happened. And I gained 10 lbs back. Slowly, but without warning I realized my jeans wouldn't do up. I hated the way I looked in clothes and I would give up on trying to find a nice outfit. To make matters worse I turned to food and would use statements like, "You'll try again tomorrow". Well tomorrow never came and I'm still making excuses everyday.

This is why I need your help. I've began to doubt and be unkind to myself when I look in the mirror. I'm clueless when it comes to a healthy lifestyle and frankly I could use all the advice I can get! If you were kind enough to read through all my rambling and want to reach out and connect with me I love to talk with you and support each other!

Thanks for listening!

Ashley

Replies

  • skymningen
    skymningen Posts: 532 Member
    Options
    You are so self-reflective and focused. Congratulations! I am sure you will make it.
    There are so many ways to learn about healthy eating. I learned quite a lot for myself just by using websites which tell you the most x-rich foods. I went there for protein-rich, because I needed to include more of that in my diet.
    When you start looking for it, there is so much advice available everywhere and you can come here to discuss everyone's experiences about that.
    Good luck on your journey! I am sure you will do well.
  • mygreenhalo
    mygreenhalo Posts: 1 Member
    Options
    Hi Ashley,

    Be kind to yourself, even if you don't like what you see. From your profile photo I see a beautiful girl and we all need to love ourselves more, I think that is half the battle, no matter who we are or what we look like.

    You have done amazingly well in the past, congratulations! That is definitely reason to be proud! For now, you have the power to change what you don't like and you've taken the first step by reaching out here - hopefully that will catapult you along your journey.

    While I've logged in every day for over a year, I've not necessarily logged my food, in fact I haven't for weeks... and I've fallen into a hole and am struggling with eating too much crap again. Like you, I keep saying, "I'll start again tomorrow" but it never happens. I'm 10kg down on where I was last year, but that is starting to rise again and I am miserable for it... and cursing myself.

    I've never added any friends despite being on here so long and haven't been on the boards at all. I thought it might be about time to make some connections to hopefully re-motivate myself, so very happy to give you some support and motivation if you'd like to add me.

    Stay strong! I have no doubt by reaching out you'll make lots of supportive friends who will help you find your mojo again.

    :) Nat
  • EsmeMary101
    EsmeMary101 Posts: 154 Member
    Options
    Hello Ashley

    Come and join the Fat 2 Fit challenge. It's a very friendly and supportive group. It restarts every month so in a few days or so they'll be calling for people to join the August one.

    Also add me as a friend if u like. I find having a few and sharing my diary really helpful.
  • MrsRemyRoc
    MrsRemyRoc Posts: 11 Member
    Options
    Hi Ashley

    Firstly well done! You've managed to be more insightful into your own life and habits than a lot of people ever get. Secondly, 10lbs is not so bad at all. You've got this. As soon as you get a few days back into it you will feel better quite quickly! Good luck lass.
  • Nate1619
    Nate1619 Posts: 25 Member
    Options
    Ashley, it's so easy to slip back into unhealthy if we're not focused on maintaining it. Feel free to add me here. I'll be sticking around for a while too!
  • ngoziish
    ngoziish Posts: 60 Member
    Options
    Welcome back Ashley! Thanks for being transparent by sharing your story. I can certainly relate to some parts of your story. First thing is recognizing you have a problem and the other is doing something about it. I commend you for this. I will be happy to join and assist you in your weight loss journey if you will allow me. My diary is open to all friends and do not hesitate to ask if you have any question related to food or fitness activities. Feel free to add me. All the best!