Convincing the Husband

MaddMaestro · July 2017

I'm at the point in my weight loss now shere I know I can really benefit from a personal trainer. Why a personal trainer specifically? I have trouble motivating myself to start and keep going with a weight and high intensity work out. I dont have friends or family that I can bring to the gym with me (they're not interested in going)

My husband is highly against putting money out for a trainer because of the expense. While I agree that they are expensive, cardio is not much of a challenge anymore, and I'm scared to push myself because of potential injuries. I've had one before by not having the right posture on a machine before.

No matter what I've said to the husband, he seems to tjink that I can just do it on my own. I really can't, and I don't think he'll consider my fears all that much. What should I be doing in this situation where I could really use a gym partner/trainer? Too afraid to try Craigslist, and Meetup doesn't have what I'm looking for (they're more like hiking groups, not gym groups, and I already hike on my own.)

MidModJenn · July 2017

Would he be up for a compromise? Perhaps he'd be cool with you working out with a trainer for a couple of months to start, and the trainer could set up a weekly workout plan for you... then you could meet with him/her 1x/month after that to ensure your form is still good and that you're still being challenged in your workouts.

rheddmobile · July 2017

Does he have to approve every expense? Is there something else you ordinarily do for yourself that you could cut back, such as manicures? Can you afford the trainer? You're a grown person and should be able to spend money without his approval, within reason.

MaddMaestro · July 2017

rheddmobile wrote: »

Does he have to approve every expense? Is there something else you ordinarily do for yourself that you could cut back, such as manicures? Can you afford the trainer? You're a grown person and should be able to spend money without his approval, within reason.

Joint bank accounts say otherwise.

Also, what I USED to do for myself was food. I no longer do that seeing as how I've lost nearly 80 pounds using MFP

It's not just me. He's just frugal as he will never buy for himself. If he does, he'll shop around for the best deal, rebate and coupons first. The only reason I've even got a gym membership is because I pay $10 a month. Same gym also have trainers available, but for $100 + for 3 or 6 months. Therefore, it makes less sense to get a separate trainer at a more expensive gym.

KarinaOrtiz6 · July 2017

You can always look for group training sessions that are with a trainer. I'm actually in the same boat as you! Exactly the same boat!

But anyway yes, group sessions are usually much cheaper. Also, I'd drill the importance that this is for you. And on another note, for me I was thinking about waiting around tax season to put $500 towards a trainer. Depends on how much you get and if you're willing to wait. I just started my own journey and have plenty to lose so it wouldn't hurt me to wait. Plus I want to show my husband how hard I'm willing to work for this before bringing up the trainer again.

Also for the time being, I recommend books on form and strength training. I have one called "Strength Training Bible for Women". I'd say to educate yourself as much as you can so when you do see a trainer you have some knowledge down pact and that can potentially save you money on him or her. I watch YouTube videos. And if you're ready you can even record yourself in front of a mirror and compare to what you've learned and watched.

What else? Hmmm.. oh and there are online coaches too that you can send videos too and they're much cheaper too. But be careful with those.

Keep your head up. And don't worry you're not the only couple that talk major purchases out. When you marry you become one.

TorStar80 · July 2017

Is he just being cheap or is there just no money to spare? What about picking up some part time hours somewhere to cover it, then you won't have to get it approved.

everycontinent · July 2017

There are other options - what about apps that talk you through the exercises? (Thinking aptiva or Fitbit). Or even getting the app 7 minute workout? I believe that is $4.99 one time purchase. YouTube and Netflix's all have great workout options - you can do a lot with body weight exercises. I understand why you want a trainer but if that's not in the budget, figure out another option.

PaytraB · July 2017

Have you checked out the local Recreational Center? They usually have a gym and a trainer. The charges are less (just admission to the Center) and you do have to share the trainer with others in the gym but he will give everyone some time.

DebLaBounty · July 2017

Does your gym offer a one-time free introduction to the equipment that you haven't done yet? You can tell the trainer that you just want someone to show you proper form this one time so you can avoid injuries. Believe me, they want you to have a good workout, and free is good.

Another approach with your husband might be to point out that if you get injured you may have to pay a doctor bill, a referral to a physical therapist for recovery, and, if you have a job, lost time at work. Prevention is cheaper in the long run. Honestly, you've reached a workout stall and have identified a very reasonable course of action to maintain your health. You've been saving money on food for months, and you've certainly earned the reward for yourself. Three months with a trainer for $100 works out to about $34 per month. That's about $8.50 per week. Cheaper than one meal out at a restaurant.

Congrats on the 80 pound weight loss! That's a great accomplishment.

InkAndApples · July 2017

My argument is that my trainer is cheaper than all of the following:
1) my exorbitant spending on clothes (which I can't do as training is changing my size too much to warrant it atm)
2) anti anxiety medication and therapy
3) takeaway bills three or four nights a week

All of which used to be "necessary" and would be required again were I not to go training twice per week.

Note - I also use the same argument for the cleaner, only this time that it's cheaper than marriage counseling.

TavistockToad · July 2017

If you feel so strongly about it you need to tell him that its happening.

How do you decide on what else you spend your money on, if its all 'both of yours'?

MichelleLaree13 · July 2017

If the expense is truly out of the question, I feel there are other options.
Maybe sign up for a class that introduces you to new exercises? It would be way cheaper if it isnt already included in a membership. Maybe you will meet a new workout buddy in one of the classes.
Your gym might offer a one time free training session to show you how to do things yourself.
I am always a little off put by free weights by myself just because I dont want to hurt myself doing the wrong form. When I have done free weights by myself, I use pinterest to find workouts and then google videos or step by step instructions. When I was new to weights, I mostly stuck to the stuff I thought was safe... directions are on the machine and it seems pretty safe. At my gym, there is a leg press and an abduction/adduction machine that both have instructions on them.
I still wont do certain exercises without a partner... I don't want my skull crushers to crush my skull, lol.

Heather4448 · July 2017

Work an extra shift here and there to offset the expense. Sell your old clothes. There's always a way. Just be creative:)

lorrpb · July 2017

Are you near a Y? They will set you up with a plan, teach you the machines, always have staff available, and review your progress from time to time, all included in your basuc membership fee ..
Can you work with a trainer 1x week rather than all the time? Or for a month then go on your own?
Maybe hubby will be your training partner?

Convincing the Husband

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