Reverse Transformation

Nothing is "ruined." This is a journey to be healthier. This is a lifelong endeavor. It doesn't stop when you reach a goal weight. Accept that we all screw up (from time to time) and then move forward. Always move forward.

Are you eliminating favorite foods? Are you trying to do too much all at once (too low calories)? Find a middle ground where you can stay more consistent.

I'm sorry you're struggling with this. Don't beat yourself up. That is negative, wasted energy that you can use elsewhere.

Since you are on meds, is it possible to get a referral to a therapist to help with the emotional eating? There are ways to conquer it and learn useful tools along the way. No one is perfect and no day is perfect so just be patient with yourself, Keep track of what works for you and what doesn't. It's a lot of trial and error.

Don't layer your boyfriend's annoyance with you on top of everything else. That's his issue; not yours. You focus on YOUR health and then decide if he's someone you need in your life long term.

Tell yourself that you can do this. Even when you think you can't and "know" you can't, you can.

As a depression sufferer myself, it can be a struggle to tell yourself you are worth it, even when the universe feels like it's saying otherwise. Start small. You seem to attach to methods and quit pretty quickly. You have to stick to something for several months to truly reap the benefits.

Start by just logging your intake. Don't cut anything. Just see where you stand. At this time, I also recommend a food scale because it will be a beneficial habit to get into when the weight gets harder to lose closer to goal. Once you have a week or two logged, see where you can cut small things here and there. An extra soda? A piece of candy? Etc. slowly bring yourself to a deficit so it doesn't become overwhelming.

Then possibly start adding light exercise. Maybe boyfriend and you could go for a walk or hike? Try to include him in physical activities if you're interested in continuing a possibly tense relationship. It could help communication and time spent together. Otherwise, just do it for you if it is not an option.

Essentially, you are looking for a sustainable way of life. Not just a diet. What you do has to be able to translate to the long term. This is why so many fad diets like low-carb fail when there's no medical necessity to it.

Talk therapy can be very helpful in conjunction with the meds. It's good to discuss your feelings about weight loss, binging, and how to deal with your boyfriend's nonsupporting comments to you.

Congrats on joining MFP, getting a new scale and using your Fitbit. Follow the plan, take some walks outside (which decrease stress), and you'll have success.

Exercise! And try to include you're boyfriend in it. I have gained about 40lbs in the past two years. I am extremely unhappy with the way I look and feel. I decided I am the only one who can really change it. Thankfully my boyfriend and our sons (1 two legged and 1 four legged) are on board to help me. I have changed the way I eat and no longer turn to food when I'm upset. Alcohol too. I still drink occasionally but not so much and not so much beer. I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss beer but my body is more important. I jog with my dog once a day for a mile and a half. Sometimes my boyfriend and my son join and I will jog the first half and then walk after I turn around and catch up with them. I do a few exercises at home too. Sit-ups, push-ups, plank...etc. but even with working out the biggest thing for me was changing what I eat and tracking it. I use essential oils to help with anxiety/depression but have also found exercising and staying active helps immensely! Good luck to you!