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Why so much Negativity????

msblueyes5
msblueyes5 Posts: 126 Member
edited September 2024 in Motivation and Support
So I joined MFP about 4 weeks ago because a friend recommended it to me. At first it was great, and still is for tracking food and exercise. I like to read blogs and threads to get better educated on things I may not know much about and also I like the communication with all my friends on here. However, recently I see SOO much negativity in threads. People are literally attacking people and trying to make them feel stupid for not being completely accurate in what they say. God forbid we aren't all perfect. It is really discouraging me from even reading any of this info because half of it is bulls**t arguments. I used to do Youtube videos and then trolls became rampid and I stopped. Can't we all just get along??

Replies

  • Grimmerick
    Grimmerick Posts: 3,342 Member
    haha unfortunately when you post and blog in a world of other people you have strong personalities and conflicting opinions. It's the same everywhere, you just ignore and do what you have to do. Every few days I read a post like yours with someone new to here that wonders why no can get along. For the most part we do and we just ignore the rest. Welcome and good luck!
  • theaterfan23
    theaterfan23 Posts: 256 Member
    I have not come across any such negativity yet, but when you do it is important to disregard those who are negative and associate with those who are positive influences!
  • LosingTheWeight2014
    LosingTheWeight2014 Posts: 173
    I totally agree with you. The worst part is some people will misread someone original post and lecture them about something that isn't even what they stated in the first place.

    Everyone has their own journey and it's not for you, me, anyone else to tell someone what's right or wrong for them. Just be supportive, give suggestions when asked and take what you will away from others statements and comments.
  • TheYoungRetiree
    TheYoungRetiree Posts: 84 Member
    How true! It only takes one negative comment to break someone's dream- a site like this is a site for support, not negativity! I haven't run into much, but I just started as well. It's sad that we can't be a supportive community for others!
  • ericadesiree
    ericadesiree Posts: 27
    it is sad!! people that attack others are usually the ones with the lowest self esteem! i usually just ignore it as best as i can and find more positive people. it'd be nice if we could all support each other equally but the truth is that will never happen. i make youtube videos now and haven't had any problems yet. knock on wood. hope you enjoy MFP aside from the rude people out there!
  • Gilbrod
    Gilbrod Posts: 1,216 Member
    I wish we could. But unfortunately, it's human nature. I think if we al realize that we are all on the same journey here, maybe our language would be different. Se la vi :o|
  • RagtimeLady
    RagtimeLady Posts: 172 Member
    I hear ya. I was discouraged last week because I've been working my butt off and I gained weight. I got slammed bigtime, and the whole topic deteriorated into a high school slugfest. As if I didn't feel bad enough from not losing weight! People either didn't look at my diary, or if they did, they had nothing but criticism. I'm an experienced, successful dieter - a glance at my profile would show that, and I got whacked like a stupid newbie.

    But one good thing came out of that mess - I got several friend requests from people who are nice, knowledgeable and helpful! Now I do most of my communicating on my home page and gird myself for any exchanges on the boards....

    Ignore the trolls, the good ones will find you. :bigsmile:

    Cheers, :drinker:

    Tracy
  • BeeElMarvin
    BeeElMarvin Posts: 2,086 Member
    I think people read something, that, maybe, wasn't phrased quite as well as it could have been, and it triggers something, a feeling, very deep inside and they just sort of go off. Everyone seems to want to believe that the way they are losing weight is the best way possible and they seem to get very defensive about it at times. There are so many effective ways to do this and some folks just don't want to hear about it and get sort of grumpy...
  • karrenbennett
    karrenbennett Posts: 89
    Negative people are like black holes, they will suck you in. Stay away from them.

    There will always be negative people. I use to read the posts people place on news articles until I found out that is what was depressing me. It wasn't the article about how 38 people lost their lives... it was the live people posting stupid and mean comments. I've learned to not read them anymore. The problem is these people will never go away,

    I've been very fortunate that every one that I've met on MFP has been great. If there are negative people on the forum I generally try to ignore then and don't accept their Friend request. I don't need that kind of negativity. Life is hard enough without having to listen to them too.

    The other thing to remember is that posts can easily be misinterpreted. The problem is we can't read people's body language when reading a post. There's no raised eyebrow, genuine smile or bulging neck vein so it's difficult to read people's intentions. Face-to-face interaction is rich with information because we interpret what people say using their tone, facial expressions and body language. Emails and posts are nonverbal and lacking in emotional clues.

    There's a survey done by Michigan State University that determined that jokes written in emails are less funny than the same joke told face-to-face.

    Personally.... I can't wait for email 2.0 or posts 2.0 with integrated video and audio.
  • msblueyes5
    msblueyes5 Posts: 126 Member
    it is sad!! people that attack others are usually the ones with the lowest self esteem! i usually just ignore it as best as i can and find more positive people. it'd be nice if we could all support each other equally but the truth is that will never happen. i make youtube videos now and haven't had any problems yet. knock on wood. hope you enjoy MFP aside from the rude people out there!

    You do!! Whats your username?? Ill subscribe to you..My user name is the same as the one I have for here...what are you videos about??
  • msblueyes5
    msblueyes5 Posts: 126 Member
    I hear ya. I was discouraged last week because I've been working my butt off and I gained weight. I got slammed bigtime, and the whole topic deteriorated into a high school slugfest. As if I didn't feel bad enough from not losing weight! People either didn't look at my diary, or if they did, they had nothing but criticism. I'm an experienced, successful dieter - a glance at my profile would show that, and I got whacked like a stupid newbie.

    But one good thing came out of that mess - I got several friend requests from people who are nice, knowledgeable and helpful! Now I do most of my communicating on my home page and gird myself for any exchanges on the boards....

    Ignore the trolls, the good ones will find you. :bigsmile:

    Cheers, :drinker:

    Tracy

    :) I love this!!! You are so right Tracy!!
  • msblueyes5
    msblueyes5 Posts: 126 Member
    Negative people are like black holes, they will suck you in. Stay away from them.

    There will always be negative people. I use to read the posts people place on news articles until I found out that is what was depressing me. It wasn't the article about how 38 people lost their lives... it was the live people posting stupid and mean comments. I've learned to not read them anymore. The problem is these people will never go away,

    I've been very fortunate that every one that I've met on MFP has been great. If there are negative people on the forum I generally try to ignore then and don't accept their Friend request. I don't need that kind of negativity. Life is hard enough without having to listen to them too.

    The other thing to remember is that posts can easily be misinterpreted. The problem is we can't read people's body language when reading a post. There's no raised eyebrow, genuine smile or bulging neck vein so it's difficult to read people's intentions. Face-to-face interaction is rich with information because we interpret what people say using their tone, facial expressions and body language. Emails and posts are nonverbal and lacking in emotional clues.

    There's a survey done by Michigan State University that determined that jokes written in emails are less funny than the same joke told face-to-face.

    Personally.... I can't wait for email 2.0 or posts 2.0 with integrated video and audio.

    I was the same way before. I used to get depressed from the news and the comments! Poeple are seriously crazy out there lol!! But you are riht. I should just not dwell on it and remeber to be as nice as I can to people and thats it. I can't change ppl I don't know, nor do I want to I guess. I will spend my energy on all the people that are so supportive to me on here from now on and foregt "the blackholes"! :)
  • missysmission777
    missysmission777 Posts: 82 Member
    I totally agree... I've seen so much negativity but you just move on and let them be well (idiots) ... I don't read alot of blogs, for one I don't have the time but I post on the POSITIVE ones.... Don't let others take away your joy, happiness and love for others. YOU can stand firm and take a step and be different... People will notice that you are different....

    May you have a great success in your weight loss journey. You feel free to friend me if you like.

    One of my favorites quotes:

    ~~~~~~~Do not follow where the path may lead. Go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.~~~~~


    Missy
  • Eats_With_A_Fist
    Eats_With_A_Fist Posts: 181
    Cling to the good, chuck the bad, and work hard at staying positive and strong! Keep in mind that you're pursuing better health for yourself and that even the best from others doesn't change that at the end of the day. Stay focused on your goals and make a difference in your life and if you can find people who inspire you and give you strength, reach out to them and lean on them as much as possible. As far as everyone else is concerned...Illegitimi non carborundum, (never let the *kitten* get you down)!
  • icandothistrish85
    icandothistrish85 Posts: 116
    I agree with everyone on here! Ignore the trolls, especially the ones that twist and warp EVERYTHING you write or post on your own profile. You want honest supportive REAL down to Earth friends that keep it real on here. You don't need fake friend collectors that sugar coat and butter everything with a repeatitive "WTG!" those are usually the people that just collect a number of friends and don't genuinely support and suggest tips. We're here to support others living the LIFE LONG journey of a healthy lifestyle. Not everyday is going to be perfect, not every food journal completion is going to be completely healthy and not every blog post is going into the inspirational *kitten*-kissing hall of fame. You will have sad days, bad days, frustrated days and the only friends you need around are the ones that understand the emotions of a REAL world person, supportive them (good, bad and ugly), reassure them and kick their *kitten* back in line!

    If you would like a real HONEST friend like that, feel free to add me. This site is amazing! It can help in more than just physical weight-loss ways. If you ignore the BS and get great honest friends, it'll help you get rid of fat-brain thinking as well. And everyone KNOWS you need a healthy mind BEFORE you try to have a healthy body!!

    Always,
    Trisha
  • mangirl
    mangirl Posts: 93
    Internet is not serious business.
  • IronSmasher
    IronSmasher Posts: 3,908 Member
    I'm sorry, I'm just kind of a negative person :(

    I always mean well. I always help people that ask questions as much as I can.

    It's all the people that offer advice that is complete and utter nonsense when others need help that I have a problem with.
  • twistedsista0408
    twistedsista0408 Posts: 71
    I try to look through the negative talk at what they mean by it...are they giving constructive critism or just trying to make someone feel like crap because that's how they feel about themselves. I pity the person who is intentionally negative toward good efforts of others. Flee from it! Embrace the encouragement others will give! Live your life to the fullest, it's the only one you got!
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