How do you motivate yourself to work out when you're too tired and you have little time?

MJDuley
MJDuley Posts: 47 Member
edited November 20 in Fitness and Exercise
Sorry if this is long, but I just want to give everyone as much info as possible.

My husband and I get up at 4am for work. I REALLY do not want to get up earlier than that, as I can't get to bed before 9pm as it is and it's usually closer to 10. I don't get home from work until 5pm and my husband a little after, so that gives us 4 hours to get dinner on the table, spend time with our kids (two under age 5) and get them ready for bed, then get ready for bed ourselves. So we're TIRED at the end of the day! And it's HOT here right now (still in the 100's). I really hate exercising as it is, but to try and motivate myself to do so when it's so hot and I'm so tired has been almost impossible.

DH also works outside in the heat all day, a very physical job, so the last thing he wants to do is exercise or go for walks out in the heat. I'm also in school, so most of my free time is taken up with that. I know I need to exercise. I desperately want to lose weight and get in better shape. I'm 45, badly out of shape (I still look 7 or 8 months pregnant almost 16 months after my son was born and I'm about 30-40 lbs over weight) I'm tired all the time (I have hypothyroidism but am on medication for it and have it checked every year) and I want to live to see my kids have kids! How do you find time and motivate yourself to exercise when you've never liked to exercise, have a packed day and you're just too tired at the end of it?

Over the years I've tried workout DVDs, stationary bikes, weight lifting (I used to do that a lot in my 20's), jogging, yoga and exercise classes, but I just hate all of that. Exercise bores me to tears. I've never been able to handle jogging or running; I ALWAYS end up with a bad headache afterward, even when I was younger, thinner and in great shape. And yes, I have my physical every year (plus an additional physical and physical fitness test every two years for my job) and no doctor yet has found a reason for my jogging/running-induced headaches.

The ONLY thing I really enjoy doing in terms of exercise is hiking our local mountain parks. DH and I used to do that before our youngest two kids came along (I have three adult kids from my 20's), back when we had different jobs and more free time. But I'd have to take the kids and it's just way too hot right now. The irony is that by the time it cools off enough for me to feel safe taking them, it will be too dark in the evenings and the parks close when it gets dark, so we literally won't have time except on weekends.

We also don't have anywhere to put exercise equipment at home and no room to even workout except our living room. So I'd be trying to workout in the evening while DH is trying to watch TV and the kids are running around. They'd be climbing all over me.

I know probably a lot of this stuff sounds like excuses. Even as I read my post they look like excuses to me. But to me they are very real obstacles. I know I can't be the only person dealing with these challenges. How have others on here dealt with them? Help!
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Replies

  • Savyna
    Savyna Posts: 789 Member
    Do you have classes back to back at school? If not does the school have a gym you can dip into for 15 or so minutes to do something? If not walk everywhere on campus, and take the stairs. In response to the livingroom workouts: I'd involve the kids. The husband can continue to watch tv but if your kids want to crawl around on you, use them as weights more or less. Have them climb around and do some lunges or squats or push ups making sure they don 't fall off. It's fun for them, you get to all bond and play and you get a workout from it. When my 4 year old nephew comes to visit, we always find some time to play together and every time he throws a ball or rolls it towards me I find some bodyweight movement I can incorporate between that. I also just pick him up and put him down to music. It's fun for him as well as for me, but I also get to use my muscles moving an active child through space. Hopefully one of these suggestions can work for you. Good luck.
  • brookielaw
    brookielaw Posts: 814 Member
    CICO will help you lose weight, whether or not you get exercise. I truly understand how tiring life and kids (particularly littles) are! I often walk on my lunch break, in my air-conditioned office building. Is that possible for you? It gives me time to play with my two year old at home before she's off to bed. I do *make* time for myself outside of work three times a week---a scheduled hour with the trainer on Saturdays, and at least two swims a week, where I have my DH pick Little Bit up from Daycare and I head straight there from work. I'm motivated to do it because it helps me keep my sanity, between the Little One and the stress of work and life. So here are some suggestions: find something else you love to do that helps you get moving. For me it's swimming. I also love lifting, so I'm motivated to do it. I include the whole family in active time---remember, you are setting an example for your kiddos. Little Bit loves to run and play at the park and will tolerate a ride in the stroller while DH and I walk for the reward of sliding and swinging after. When it cools down start taking them to the park! While it's still warm do you have access to a pool? Playing with the kids in the water and keeping moving is an exercise that burns calories too. Once you find some activity you love (you don't have to think of it as exercise!) you'll be motivated to do it. If a pool is out and it's too hot outside to hike, what about a walk indoors somewhere? Last summer we walked at the mall. My motivation is my kiddo, and my reward is living well and teaching her to live well. I hope you find yours.
  • MJDuley
    MJDuley Posts: 47 Member
    Wow, you guys are fast! Thank you for all the replies!

    My schooling is all online, so I don't go to an actual physical school (in fact, the school itself is in another state). And I do get a break from work in the middle of the day, but that's when I'm doing school work. I'm expecting to finish classes by September of next year so that I can do my demonstration teaching in the spring of 2019. Then there will be a job change (elementary school teacher).

    It's still in the 90's to 100's here by the time I get home from work and if the temps go back up into the 110's, which they probably will, it will be hotter. I know lots of people who walk, hike and jog in these temps, but they're also all in way better shape than DH and I are, lol. Plus I worry about overheating the kids, especially the youngest. Their cheeks turn bright red after just 10-15 minutes on our back porch in the shade and they're very sweaty, so I really worry about taking them out in the sun (which currently goes down about 7:30 at night, their bedtime). It will get better once the weather cools off. We did used to take the kids for walks when the evenings were cooler and the sun went down sooner, but that's still a couple of months away (evenings will start cooling into the 70's in mid to late September, so that will help a lot). I'm just trying to find some motivation for right now while it's still so stinking hot.

    One thing I used to do but got out of the habit of last year was going for walks on field trips. I'm a school bus driver and often have field trips in the middle of the day (between routes) and the evenings. So I get paid to sit around and wait for the sports teams and classes to do whatever it is they are doing during the trip. I'm going to try and get back into walking during these trips, but I know it will be hard to get myself to do it while it's still so hot. But those times really are perfect for exercising, as it's anywhere from 2-6 hours of downtime when I have nothing else to do (no computer access, so I can't work on school). Those won't start up for another couple of weeks, but then I just have to really force myself to take advantage of the free time (last year I sat on my bus and read books, which was awesome to be able to do, but doesn't burn any calories). It will still be really hot there though. Any tips on how to just get myself to do it (some places I will be able to go indoors, but for most of the sports trips that won't be an option)?

    I've tried just cutting calories, but based on my sedentary lifestyle MFP says I need only around 1300-1400 calories and that is just not doable for me. By dinner time I am starving and I end up overeating.

    What are some good, safe ways to work out with my kids? My 4-year-old is ADHD and tends to get really wild, hurting herself and others (you wouldn't believe how many trips to urgent care or the ER we've had to make with her). So I love the idea of using the kids, but want to make sure I don't set them up for getting hurt, lol. Are there some good websites devoted to this?

    Thank you for all the suggestions!
  • MJDuley
    MJDuley Posts: 47 Member
    I forgot to mention that I have been doing some light weight lifting the past 3 days when I first get up. Not a lot, as it's been years since I've done it so I'm starting off slow. I'm only using 10lb weights and doing 3 sets of 15 bicep curls, then 2 sets of lunges (10 on each leg). So far, this isn't enough for MFP to register any calorie burn, so that's kind of discouraging. But I can feel it in my arms and legs, so I figure it must be doing something. Right?
  • Need2Exerc1se
    Need2Exerc1se Posts: 13,575 Member
    MJDuley wrote: »
    What are some good, safe ways to work out with my kids? My 4-year-old is ADHD and tends to get really wild, hurting herself and others (you wouldn't believe how many trips to urgent care or the ER we've had to make with her). So I love the idea of using the kids, but want to make sure I don't set them up for getting hurt, lol. Are there some good websites devoted to this?

    Thank you for all the suggestions!

    Active video games like the Wii are a great way to get some exercise and involve the kids. Some of the children's TV channels also now have exercise programs geared toward young children. My grandson loves some Mickey Mouse aerobic show. IDK what channel but I would guess the Disney Channel since it's Mickey.
  • ishredder
    ishredder Posts: 6 Member
    Very good comments above from earlier posters. My suggestions. Don't plan to exercise at a set time for set amount of time. Your current lifestyle will not support that. Do what you can... when you can. It really adds up. I am starving in the evening too. I bank my calories for the evening by eating less during the day. Not ideal but it works for me. Count the calories AND make the calories count. Fiber, protein. Anything to help you feel full longer. I find that calorie for calorie... nothing beats an apple to make me full.
  • laurenebargar
    laurenebargar Posts: 3,081 Member
    I too am working full time and going to school full time (even in the summer) and although I dont have kids I do have a house to attend to, make dinner and take care of a dog. I just try to get little things in. Somedays I go for a walk with the dog, weekends we go hiking, workout DVDS, last night we played soccer (two people and a dog not sure if it can be called soccer lol) for about 45 minutes. Somedays I skip breakfast and have a light lunch and then I just use all my calories at night. figure out what works for you and run with it.
  • gillidovew
    gillidovew Posts: 10 Member
    I class myself as sedentary as I work at a desk all day and mfp gave me 1200 calories for 2 lb loss a week. I was hungry and have since started using a Misfit tracker linked to mfp to monitor actual activity and this gives around 300 / 400 more per day to still lose at 2lbs a week and this is the difference of not being hungry for me. I m sure with two kids you are running around in an evening and weekends and may be doing more than you think.
  • MJDuley
    MJDuley Posts: 47 Member
    I know I definitely need to watch what I eat as well. I've gotten REALLY bad this summer with the sodas. I typically have a 44oz Pepsi every day, and sometimes more! I was doing really good in the spring and had almost quit sodas cold turkey. Then it got hot and I had "just one" and then "just one more" and now it's a daily thing. And I recently bought cookies for the first time in months which was a big mistake because I have no willpower when it comes to sugar. This is another goal I have, to eat healthier.
  • steveko89
    steveko89 Posts: 2,223 Member
    Juniper210 wrote: »
    MJDuley wrote: »
    I've tried just cutting calories, but based on my sedentary lifestyle MFP says I need only around 1300-1400 calories and that is just not doable for me. By dinner time I am starving and I end up overeating.

    I don't think MFP allows for enough calories, especially at the sedentary setting and the default macro splits could use some work. Go here follow the steps and use the TDEE spreadsheet to work on dialing in your actual TDEE. You'll need to take a scientific approach to the data collection but I've seen better results using that sheet in the last two weeks than I have for months trying to dial-in my calorie intake using other resources.

    From what Juniper210 mentioned about your diary I think improving your food choices could go a long way as well. Exercise is great but it's not the be-all-end-all for weight loss the fitness industry tries to sell. Optimize your nutrition choices and calorie-intake and weight loss will come. Maybe you can target going for a hike once per weekend if fitting exercise in during the week isn't feasible.

    Here's an interesting read from US News about exercise frequency
    http://health.usnews.com/wellness/health-buzz/articles/2017-01-10/only-working-out-a-few-days-per-week-could-mean-health-benefits-study-says
  • slimpig342
    slimpig342 Posts: 26 Member
    That sounds really tough, good on you for not giving up. I've pushed my wake-up time to 6am to get time to work out before work, but before 4am does not sound doable. I agree with @ishredder that little and often sounds like the best option for you. Do you have a pedometer? I've found that even on busy days I'm determined enough to force 10,000 steps into my day, even if it's just going to the loo at work a few floors up (drinking lots of water makes me go more often and keeps me hydrated, so win-win!) I play chase in the house with the little one to help tire him out too, though perhaps with a 4yo with ADHD that's not the best idea for you.
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    edited August 2017
    Unless you husband has some specific fitness aspirations, he doesn't need to workout if he has a very active job...his body doesn't know whether he's working in the gym or doing hard labor outside. I used to do landscape constructions...no deliberate exercise/workout was necessary for anything.

    In regards to motivation in general, you just need to find something you enjoy...most of my "workouts" are just fund recreational activities that I enjoy...mostly I ride my bike...I do so in the morning to beat the heat and a ride can be anywhere between 30-60 minutes depending on how much time I have. I also hit the climbing gym most weekends...if not, I go hiking. I lift a couple of times per week.

    I don't drone away on cardio machines or jump around my living room to DVDs, etc...I would hate that and never do it...you need to find something you enjoy doing.

    Also, your weight management is going to be far more attributable to your diet than this or that exercise...regular exercise has an added bonus of burning a handful more calories, but really, exercise is about health and well being...if your diet isn't under control, all of the exercise in the world isn't going to make a dent in your weight.
  • KayHBE
    KayHBE Posts: 906 Member
    How busy are your weekends? Could you take the kids somewhere to swim? Especially at the start I motivate myself with a step count. I challenge myself to go 100 more steps everyday and everyday I found myself with more desire and energy to go further. Losing weight is mostly about the calories, and like someone else posted finding those calories that fill you up and lessen the desire to snack and eat over your goals.
  • Brabo_Grip
    Brabo_Grip Posts: 285 Member
    There are a number of aps out there with quick (15 to 20 minute) minimal to no equipment exercises. They are not a magic bullets but something is better than nothing. Check out the 12 minute athlete. It's pretty cool and cheap. ($3 maybe?)
  • MJDuley
    MJDuley Posts: 47 Member
    cwolfman13 wrote: »
    Unless you husband has some specific fitness aspirations, he doesn't need to workout if he has a very active job...his body doesn't know whether he's working in the gym or doing hard labor outside. I used to do landscape constructions...no deliberate exercise/workout was necessary for anything.

    Well, he's obese according to his BMI and his doctor wants him exercising more. He did lose about 30 pounds his first few months on his job last year, but now he's plateaued so his doctor wants him to increase his activity level.

    KayHBE wrote: »
    How busy are your weekends? Could you take the kids somewhere to swim? Especially at the start I motivate myself with a step count. I challenge myself to go 100 more steps everyday and everyday I found myself with more desire and energy to go further. Losing weight is mostly about the calories, and like someone else posted finding those calories that fill you up and lessen the desire to snack and eat over your goals.

    Our weekends are not too bad most of the time (although DH does often work on Saturdays). I am definitely able to do more on my days off work (like today, I'm off and my adult daughter and I are going to take the kids to the mall to go walking in a few minutes). But I know that weekends alone won't be enough.




  • MJDuley
    MJDuley Posts: 47 Member
    slimpig342 wrote: »
    Do you have a pedometer?

    I do. I actually have 4 (two I bought and two were given to me) and they all suck. None of them reads even close to accurate. I was going to ask for suggestions for good, accurate pedometers in another thread, but while we're on the subject, does anyone have any recommendations?
  • SmithsonianEmpress
    SmithsonianEmpress Posts: 1,163 Member
    Juniper210 wrote: »
    MJDuley wrote: »
    I've tried just cutting calories, but based on my sedentary lifestyle MFP says I need only around 1300-1400 calories and that is just not doable for me. By dinner time I am starving and I end up overeating.

    You are working very hard to try to come up with a way to exercise, how about putting that effort into finding a way to eat 1300-1400 calories? You will not get the weight off getting some exercise in here and there. You will get it off through calorie reduction.

    You're willing to walk around in 100 degree weather, but you are dismissing the main thing that will let you lose the weight. You have the motivation to lose, but you are putting your focus in the wrong place.

    Taking a quick look at your diary, you can make easy little changes to drop your cals. Switch from the pepsi to a diet pepsi, that's 550 calories gone. Switch from the 330 cal hamburger patty, to a 200 cal turkey burger and have one less cookie. Bam, that's basically the same amount of food but it hits your calorie target instead of going over.


    You can do this. You are not destined to keep overeating. You can make better choices. Items that help keep you full throughout the day. Small switches that drop the cal count. Prelog treats and work around them. You can do this.

    ^^^THIS...focus on what you are putting in your body...don't worry about exercise right now because your schedule is jammed packed. Eat at a deficit and you will lose weight. Find a way to stay full on your allotted calories.
  • laurenebargar
    laurenebargar Posts: 3,081 Member
    Why dont you just pick a smaller weight loss goal? Try .5 lbs a week or 1 lb and eat those calories. I started at 1,200 calories and it was just way to hard, even after I've lost 32 lbs and now am on 1,300 calories plus exercise calories (which as I mentioned before isnt me slaving away in the gym its just doing something outside or an exercise dvd) I feel satisfied and I still have the foods I enjoy. Your weight loss is going to come from your diet, Fitness is going to come from exercise, you can lose all of the weight you want with purely diet alone. I think the saying is you cant exercise your way out of a bad diet.

    As for the pedometer, I have the fitbit charge 2 and I love it. I eat 90% of my fitbit adjustment back and Im losing what im supposed to every week.
  • Packerjohn
    Packerjohn Posts: 4,855 Member
    MJDuley wrote: »
    I know I definitely need to watch what I eat as well. I've gotten REALLY bad this summer with the sodas. I typically have a 44oz Pepsi every day, and sometimes more! I was doing really good in the spring and had almost quit sodas cold turkey. Then it got hot and I had "just one" and then "just one more" and now it's a daily thing. And I recently bought cookies for the first time in months which was a big mistake because I have no willpower when it comes to sugar. This is another goal I have, to eat healthier.

    Lots of good ideas so far. You know it, the the regular Pepsi is a killer. The 550+ calories in 44 ounces takes 3-5 miles of walking to work off.

    Remember, you can't out exercise a bad diet.

    Best of luck.
  • girlgeeklula
    girlgeeklula Posts: 85 Member
    On mornings that I don't go in early for work, I motivate myself with the fact that it's the coolest time of day to workout and that I'm going to get home late and not want to. On days I do get called in, the kiddos in my class help me out (we sing and do laps around the classroom, they like for me to pick them up and do shoulder lifts and squats, or we walk down and back to the fence outside together).
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    edited August 2017
    MJDuley wrote: »
    cwolfman13 wrote: »
    Unless you husband has some specific fitness aspirations, he doesn't need to workout if he has a very active job...his body doesn't know whether he's working in the gym or doing hard labor outside. I used to do landscape constructions...no deliberate exercise/workout was necessary for anything.

    Well, he's obese according to his BMI and his doctor wants him exercising more. He did lose about 30 pounds his first few months on his job last year, but now he's plateaued so his doctor wants him to increase his activity level.

    KayHBE wrote: »
    How busy are your weekends? Could you take the kids somewhere to swim? Especially at the start I motivate myself with a step count. I challenge myself to go 100 more steps everyday and everyday I found myself with more desire and energy to go further. Losing weight is mostly about the calories, and like someone else posted finding those calories that fill you up and lessen the desire to snack and eat over your goals.

    Our weekends are not too bad most of the time (although DH does often work on Saturdays). I am definitely able to do more on my days off work (like today, I'm off and my adult daughter and I are going to take the kids to the mall to go walking in a few minutes). But I know that weekends alone won't be enough.




    He can exercise if he likes...but really, he needs to eat less...he's eating maintenance if he's not losing weight. Doing some exercise for 30-60 minutes is going to pale in comparison to having an active job in regards to energy expenditure.

    Bottom line is he is eating too much...weight loss comes down primarily to diet...it's way more efficient to just cut back on your calories than to go out and try to work everything off.

    Eat less...
  • goalpeace
    goalpeace Posts: 272 Member
    I think you need to break away from focusing on exercise right now other than trying to get in those walks during work hours. Your focus should be on logging your meals to stay within a deficit range. One thing that has worked so well for me was NEVER skipping breakfast. I also have a snack twice a day. Log everything into your diary. Don't give up on that!

    As far as cooking, I just started using my crock pot and boy does that remove hours a week in the kitchen! I also just ordered some containers to try and prep meals for the week. I plan on starting slow. Prep for Mondays only then keep going till I can do it freely.

    You have the right attitude. Remember this is YOUR life. Nobody else's. If Mama is happy, everyone is happy right?!
  • cinblog1965
    cinblog1965 Posts: 133 Member
    Wow, you are busy! I have it easy compared to you. I'm menopausal so as far as tired I do understand, it has completely drained me. And I live in Georgia so I know all about HOT! I do not focus on how I feel when I start the workout (dreading it on the drive home, etc.). Instead I focus on how good it feels to finish the workout. As for your situation, you have to make exercise work for your life and it can't be something you never enjoy doing! I don't know how old your young kids are, but I suggest finding activities that you can do with them, riding bikes in the back yard or in the neighborhood, basketball or badmitton, walking in the park. Video games that make you get up and move (Rockstar, Wii, etc.). You can find older models in pawn shops. Life is short, enjoy some of it, please!!
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