Awkward...what do ya say?

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Replies

  • mrsjohnson75
    mrsjohnson75 Posts: 182 Member
    I'm glad you took it as a compliment. 32 pounds is quite an accomplishment. U should be proud!

    I never have any issues with ppl noticing my weight loss or asking questions.
  • JimieLou
    JimieLou Posts: 273 Member
    I've had this happen to me a lot lately. The only people that know my actual number lost is my mom, sister and my FB pals.
    I've had several people who would never even speak to me otherwise come up and ask me how much weight I've lost. Others ask if I'm sick..
    I usually just respond like you did with "I don't really know."
    Then comes the "what diet are you on?" (they're obviously referring to fad diets)
    Really people...it's NOT a diet for me, it's a LIFESTYLE change.
    I eat less and more healthily. I don't deprive myself of anything, I just watch really closely what I take in.
    And then I am constantly on the move. Since I'm a teacher and I get summer's off. I dont' drive anywhere unless it's to go out of town.

    That response apparently doesn't satisfy them...however they do shut up and walk away...lol
  • starracer23
    starracer23 Posts: 1,011 Member
    I'm a Leo, so I LOVE the attention, because in my head, it's always all about me anyways ;)
    (Ok, not really.....alright, maybe a lil bit...hehehe)
    Be proud of your accomplishments, you are doing an awesome job!!!
  • Wow. Well I think your response was perfect!
  • jocemorg
    jocemorg Posts: 26 Member
    I feel the same way!! I HATE being called out or the center of attention. I went to visit my parents the other day and my mom walked in and just shouted, "Well look at YOU skinny girl!" UGHH! Haha. I know she means well, but still. :tongue: I'm still a woman, and it's still my weight we're talking about... or rather *shouldn't* be talking about. :wink:
  • kenzietea
    kenzietea Posts: 614 Member
    I think part of the resentment expressed here is not over the fact that people are noticing you have lost weight, but the corollary here that means they noticed when you were fat.

    This is extremely true! My boyfriend once told me during my (still continuing) weight loss journey that 'I was looking really good'. I was upset by this... so I didn't look good before?? He was shocked by my reaction. He said to me he thought I was drop dead gorgeous on our very first date and he was the most nervous he had ever been around anyone. He clarified his statement, that he was very attracted to me the first time we met, and didn't even notice I was over weight, BUT the more I was working out and losing weight the more confident I became. When people are more confident, they do appear more attractive. He also said this: "you think I am good looking now, and are attracted to me now, right? of course I said yes.. "well, if I started lifting heavier weights and more often, and started building more muscle, and became way more confident with myself and I felt sexier, don't you think you would find me sexier and better looking too?"... and of course my answer was yes. When you look at it from that perspective, people aren't pointing out the fact you were FAT and now you aren't, they are just acknowledging the fact you have been working hard and look great! Nothing about their comments means they thought you looked bad (I mean, obviously in most situations people don't, there will always be jerks out there). It is just like what I learned in logic class.. "Tommy lost weight because Tommy was fat. Therefore everyone who looses weight was fat"... false. If someone says "oh wow, how much weight have you lost" does not imply "wow you used to be fat (or fatter, or ugly)". Relish in the fact you look better and feel better, and that people are noticing =)
  • l3ugjuice
    l3ugjuice Posts: 233
    My responses to questions are generally something like this:

    Q: have you lost weight?

    A: yes, thanks.

    Q: How much?

    A: Not enough

    Q: How did you lose weight?

    A: Intentionally

    Q: Well yes...but HOW MUCH weight have you lost?

    A: No offense, but none of your business
  • Congratulations on your success! I'm really glad you asked this question. About two years ago my gall bladder was giving up, but for some reason the doctors had a hard time diagnosing it. In six months I lost about 50 pounds living on white bread, jam and root beer as most everything else would make me horribly sick. I couldn't exercise at all because I was so weak and in pain. People were always telling me how great I looked and asking how much I'd lost. I never knew how to respond because I knew I was really sick and unhealthy. :( I just hated it! Now that I gained that 50 pounds back and am hoping to lose it and more, I'm happy to have some ideas for responses. You guys are great!
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
    I feel like it's just two VERY different personalities at work here! Like the person that listed everything she'd be happy to share and is very grateful for the compliments... I'm much like her and a very "open book" so I often stick my foot in my mouth by making the other personality type - the more private person that doesn't like attention - feel awkward.

    I guess there's no way to stop it, but at least try to remember it's probably only with the best of intentions because you DO look amazing!
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
    I'm a Leo, so I LOVE the attention, because in my head, it's always all about me anyways ;)
    (Ok, not really.....alright, maybe a lil bit...hehehe)
    Be proud of your accomplishments, you are doing an awesome job!!!

    Rock on! :)
  • wonnder1
    wonnder1 Posts: 460
    I'll be bruttaly honest and say I ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT!!!

    I'm with you! I'm thinking about getting a button, "Hi, my name is...I've lost 18 inches thanks!"

    Those compliments have forced me to walk past the chicken wings on more than one occasion.
  • imustbegood
    imustbegood Posts: 228 Member
    I know exactly how you feel - it does feel good but I do feel like running and hiding....
  • maillemaker
    maillemaker Posts: 1,253 Member
    On average since they are less emotional, if someone were to ask them a question like that, they would answer and not be bothered by it or even think twice. If you ask most men their weight, they will usually just tell you

    Yup. For the longest time my wife refused to tell me her weight. To me, this was completely illogical and irrelevant. It's just a number.

    I think the bottom line is some people are super self-conscious about their weight, and so when people comment on it in any way, they instantly feel super-defensive about it.

    And, like was said, some people just can't take a compliment. You say, "Wow, you look nice today!", and some people will think, "Gee, did I look ugly yesterday?"
  • _SusieQ_
    _SusieQ_ Posts: 2,964 Member
    I think part of the resentment expressed here is not over the fact that people are noticing you have lost weight, but the corollary here that means they noticed when you were fat.

    This is extremely true! My boyfriend once told me during my (still continuing) weight loss journey that 'I was looking really good'. I was upset by this... so I didn't look good before?? He was shocked by my reaction. He said to me he thought I was drop dead gorgeous on our very first date and he was the most nervous he had ever been around anyone. He clarified his statement, that he was very attracted to me the first time we met, and didn't even notice I was over weight, BUT the more I was working out and losing weight the more confident I became. When people are more confident, they do appear more attractive. He also said this: "you think I am good looking now, and are attracted to me now, right? of course I said yes.. "well, if I started lifting heavier weights and more often, and started building more muscle, and became way more confident with myself and I felt sexier, don't you think you would find me sexier and better looking too?"... and of course my answer was yes. When you look at it from that perspective, people aren't pointing out the fact you were FAT and now you aren't, they are just acknowledging the fact you have been working hard and look great! Nothing about their comments means they thought you looked bad (I mean, obviously in most situations people don't, there will always be jerks out there). It is just like what I learned in logic class.. "Tommy lost weight because Tommy was fat. Therefore everyone who looses weight was fat"... false. If someone says "oh wow, how much weight have you lost" does not imply "wow you used to be fat (or fatter, or ugly)". Relish in the fact you look better and feel better, and that people are noticing =)

    Will you marry me, b/c I think you are awesome in your responses!!! ;)
  • schninie82
    schninie82 Posts: 502 Member
    And, like was said, some people just can't take a compliment. You say, "Wow, you look nice today!", and some people will think, "Gee, did I look ugly yesterday?"

    haha so true!!
  • Goal4Good
    Goal4Good Posts: 115
    I went to a company event one time. I had not seen some of my husband's business associates in like 8 months or so and I had lost 30 lbs in that amount of time. I had forgotten about it but when I walked in, one of the guys just yelled out, "Damnnnnnnnn Girl!!!! You lost a TON of weight!!!" (First of all, I did NOT lose a TON of weight.) I lost 30 lbs! so my first thought was, Okay, every person here, that has never met me before, now thinks I used to be obesely overweight. I started to tell him I'd be happy to give him my meal plan for his own use (since he was like 80 pounds overweight) but I bit my lip.

    Instead, I shook the ill timed and rather dumbass comment off, smiled and took it for the compliment this idiot actually intended it to be. But his choice of words and making me the center of attention really did surprise and embarrass me. Later on he told my husband I was super sexy and he better watch me like a hawk. (His second stupid comment of the evening.) First I was obese, and now I had the potential to become a "cheat". Some guys just don't get it!!! But I figure he didn't have a clue how he came across.
    Sometimes you just have to overlook people. They don't realize half the crap they say!!!
  • dkb228
    dkb228 Posts: 73 Member
    I'm somewhere between liking the attention and not. It really depends on who's making comments or asking me about it. When friends and family notice, I love it! When my annoying, jealous, overweight coworker makes comments and jokes about trying to force me to eat to sabotage my weight loss success, not so much. I usually give vague answers when I'm uncomfortable with the attention. This way they get their answers and leave me alone. Lol
  • laurabarrett79
    laurabarrett79 Posts: 39 Member
    I went to a company event one time. I had not seen some of my husband's business associates in like 8 months or so and I had lost 30 lbs in that amount of time. I had forgotten about it but when I walked in, one of the guys just yelled out, "Damnnnnnnnn Girl!!!! You lost a TON of weight!!!" (First of all, I did NOT lose a TON of weight.) I lost 30 lbs! so my first thought was, Okay, every person here, that has never met me before, now thinks I used to be obesely overweight. I started to tell him I'd be happy to give him my meal plan for his own use (since he was like 80 pounds overweight) but I bit my lip.

    Instead, I shook the ill timed and rather dumbass comment off, smiled and took it for the compliment this idiot actually intended it to be. But his choice of words and making me the center of attention really did surprise and embarrass me. Later on he told my husband I was super sexy and he better watch me like a hawk. (His second stupid comment of the evening.) First I was obese, and now I had the potential to become a "cheat". Some guys just don't get it!!! But I figure he didn't have a clue how he came across.
    Sometimes you just have to overlook people. They don't realize half the crap they say!!!

    Totally hear ya! Great job with your success though:)
  • If it really makes you uncomfortable, the thing that works is diverting attention away from what grabbed their attention. The question grabbed the whole table's attention (or in his case, your weight loss.)

    So just throw em a curve.
    "Wow have you lost weight?"
    "YES! Bulimia has worked absolute wonders."

    cricket. cricket.
  • ansonrinesmith
    ansonrinesmith Posts: 741 Member
    I just tell them, "Well, I've lost some, but I've got a long way to go" or "I'm x% of my goal"
  • laurabarrett79
    laurabarrett79 Posts: 39 Member
    If it really makes you uncomfortable, the thing that works is diverting attention away from what grabbed their attention. The question grabbed the whole table's attention (or in his case, your weight loss.)

    So just throw em a curve.
    "Wow have you lost weight?"
    "YES! Bulimia has worked absolute wonders."

    cricket. cricket.

    Yeah, awkward moment numero deuce. Not sure if I'm that witty.
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